Seeing someone again? 48.5 > 46

[deepstillwater]

I was in a long term relationship of six years that ended last year, although my ex boyfriend and I are still quite good friends. It mainly ended because we were friends, not lovers. I'm sure some older couples will smile at this, but as we are only 33 it was very daunting to face a relationship where were was no longer any passion (my ex did not want to hold my hand while walking down the street).

I've started dating, in the sense that I went out on three dates with one man. The first was simply amazing, lots of fun and laughter - I felt as if we really connected. So I asked to kiss him at the end and he agreed, and it was lovely.

But on the second and third dates he got progressively more distant: saying he prefers to take things slower. Which of course is fine with me! Except his idea of slower is not kissing, or showing affection.

I guess it would be fine to do that, except I actually really like this man, I am not dating anyone else and I'm also wanting to know someone wants me in a romantic way. I felt he was giving me mixed messages: being friendly and charming, but distant.

He has told me I've lovely, but that he doesn't think he is the man for me - and that he would return the book I loaned him at any time.

My reply was, " I understand, and I appreciate the honesty. Keep the book - return it if you ever feel like a friendly chat (I know now there is no attraction there - I won't reiterate what I have previously said to you - the last date was bruising enough). If not then read/enjoy and pass the book onto someone you think would enjoy it."


So yes, I'm sure you can imagine why I asked this question.

Will I see him again? 48.5 > 46

Perhaps I will, or perhaps I will come to greater understanding internally about why this happened the way it did.

 

[goddessliss]

OOOh naughty deepstillwater you know better than to ask yes/no questions! I think this means just enjoy whatever he offer you, just enjoy.
From personal experience however, please just move on from your desire of the relationship to be any different and believe what he says - there is someone else that is the right one for you. - Liss

 

[deepstillwater]

dang...

and of course, that is great advice.

Thanks Liss

 

[Olga Super Star]

Did you see him again?

 

[deepstillwater]

Funnily enough Olga,
I've not "seen" him but he dated a good friend of mine briefly (five dates) and he is on her Facebook. He regularly likes posts that contain myself and my friend. It was very bizarre when it first happened as their dating ended in a pretty dramatic and hurtful way by his behaviour. My friend and I accidentally found out we had dated the same guy, and at first it was a bit shocking but I was glad I was able to help my friend with some insights I had gained by dating him (he is a boy that likes the chase, not the winning for example.)
But many month's later he requested her on Facebook and they are friendly enough. I don't know if we remembers me as we did date very briefly, but it is quite amusing in some respects.
So very simply and broadly speaking... I think 48.5 represented the drawing from the well that is Facebook!

 

[Olga Super Star]

thanks for updating!

I have asked because when I was about to get an agent I had to choose among three and thought 48.5 was the most promising one - you can drink the water
Almost two years have passed and nothing came of it: I have not seen them again !!!


But nothing bad came of it either, and sometimes this is quite a lot, I have to admit