=__= sexual situation..... 12 (unchanging)

[CheersC]

hello. I hope this kind of question is accepted in this forum, but I will be quite soft about it. Basically, I'm worried that my love life is not going anywhere, so I asked if AT LEAST I would have some kind of short affair...12 Unchanging. lol, that sounds like I have no chance of any activity D:unless... If the hexagram is unchanging, my friend reads the major line, which is the 5th, that says i dont have to worry because stillness is over

 

[diamanda]

12 says that the small comes and the large goes.

It doesn't sound super great for your love life.
But... since you asked about something small, maybe you'll get it.
Then again, if you go for the small, you'll lose the 'large', whatever that means.

In this type of question, I always find it helpful to set a time limit.
e.g. "will I have even a short affair till the end of this month?".
If the cast sounds good, great! If it sounds not so good, you'll have hope for later

 

[CheersC]

Thank you Dia! I didn't set specific time limits, yes, I asked if something would happen ''soon''. I will do the way you suggested.ahaha, ehm, perhaps it's better small than nothing :/

 

[CheersC]

Diamanda I asked with the specific time limit... ! ''Will I have any hot contact with someone interesting by the end of this month?''40.3.4 to 46 46 is about improvement and about meeting someone... good... but 40.3 speaks about a burden...same thing about 40.4 line that is about having friends around

 

[moss elk]

D:unless... If the hexagram is unchanging, my friend reads the major line, which is the 5th, that says i dont have to worry because stillness is over.

Your friend has been misled.

You did not receive 12.5, you received 12 unchanging.
All you need to read with an unchanging hexagram is the image and judgment. (the 5th line is often very helpful in understanding a hex as a whole, but the meaning of line 5 here is different than the meaning of 12 unchanging.
Entirely different. can you see this?)


Here is an example to show your friend.
If you asked about the worth of going to do something and got 23 unchanging, the Judgement advises:
No advantage in going there.

If you got 23.5, it would be saying yes there is advantage (favor) here, and it comes through the ladies of the palace.


So, what do the image and judgement say here?

 

[CheersC]

So , the image says: Say no to wrong peopleNo harvest for a noble one's determination The great proceeds, the small comes upThe great image says:Heaven and Earth do not interact: obstructionThe noble one holds back his virtue and avoids disasterHe does not allow honor by an official salaryu_u i keep being a nun

 

[diamanda]

Hi Cherry,

I totally agree with Moss Elk - when you get an unchanging hexagram, you do not read its 5th line. You just look at what it says in the Judgement, in the Image, and also the direct character translation, and you see what you make of that.

Will I have any hot contact with someone interesting by the end of this month? 40.3.4 > 46

Sorry to say that no, not with "someone interesting".

40.3 advises to not pretend that we're "rich".
40.4 advises to make a first move towards someone we trust.
Hidden line 32.4 says that there's no game in a particular field.

In conclusion, you need to make a move towards someone you already know, someone who probably lives south to you (46). Then you can have some hot contact with that person. Not sure about the end of the month though. 46 shows 'wood' (probably referring to male desire here) very slowly starting to rise through the earth, so even if you reach out to that 'safe bet' who lives south, the process might still not be that quick.

 

[CheersC]

well, there's a guy who is actually moving towards an eastern/southern city.. I invited him (WHY WOULDn't THEY DO ANYTHING TOWARDS ME IF I DIDN'T????!!!!!!!! No real interest?!?!) and he said ''ok''. But we didn't decide where and when, so I expect he won't call me. Except this cat-mouse situation, in which i'm always running for someone who doesn't give a damn about me, there was the guy of the other question (the one who also disappears or mocks after being kind) but I'm actually NOT going to do action towards him.I'm fed up.

 

[CheersC]

So yea, I guess I will just have some small contacts or friendships.

 

[diamanda]

well, there's a guy who is actually moving towards an eastern/southern city.. I invited him (WHY WOULDn't THEY DO ANYTHING TOWARDS ME IF I DIDN'T????!!!!!!!! No real interest?!?!) and he said ''ok''. But we didn't decide where and when

Ah yes, this sounds exactly like the situation the cast described.
I'm afraid you'll have to be the most proactive of the two of you, but, I'm pretty sure it will happen between you eventually. And 40.4 says you can trust him, and also 46 is promising.

Why he wouldn't have done anything towards you first - could be a million reasons. Maybe he never thought you'd be interested, maybe he's emotionally retarded, maybe maybe, who knows why. Don't take it personally (alhtough I know it's hard).

I totally understand you're fed up... but please try to not lose your cool. If you lose your cool and your self-esteem, then you lose the whole game.

So yea, I guess I will just have some small contacts or friendships.

Small for now, for February. Only 8 more days left ;-)

 

[CheersC]

Ah yes, this sounds exactly like the situation the cast described.I'm afraid you'll have to be the most proactive of the two of you, but, I'm pretty sure it will happen between you eventually. And 40.4 says you can trust him, and also 46 is promising.Why he wouldn't have done anything towards you first - could be a million reasons. Maybe he never thought you'd be interested, maybe he's emotionally retarded, maybe maybe, who knows why. Don't take it personally (alhtough I know it's hard).I totally understand you're fed up... but please try to not lose your cool. If you lose your cool and your self-esteem, then you lose the whole game.Small for now, for February. Only 8 more days left ;-)

Aahahahah I don't know what to expect anymore but more I ching and less worries are on the road for sure XD

 

[rosada]

I think of hexagrams 11 and 12 as describing a roller coaster ride.
With 11 Judgement and Image everyone is getting off and getting on - The small depart, the great approach, while the man in charge, the ruler, helps everyone find their seats and regulates the switches and so aids the people.
1.1 Everyone is focused on the same goal and the able man joins right in and climbs on board.
11.2 Some are scared, some are laughing, but we all have our own seats and each can have their own individual experience.
11.3 And away we go! Life and the roller coaster go up and down and down and up! All we're required to do is hang on. Eventually it will end, so enjoy it while you can.
11.4 The ride is over and everyone, rich or poor, wise or naive must get off.
Don't cry because it's over...
11.5 Be grateful because it happened.
11.6 Again, your turn is up and the ride is shutting down, folks. Complain if you like but you wont change anything and you're just making a fools of yourselves!!!

So then we come to hexagram 12 where life and the roller coaster are at a Standstill.
So the Judgement and Image tell us that the group departs, the great people move on to other adventures and only small people approach asking their money back and particularly the Superior man knows his time is worth more than this and moves on, refusing to get involved with any doomed demands for refunds.

So all in all I'm seeing Standstill is not meaning that things are somehow stalled or that one is in a situation where one should be patient and wait. I'm seeing Standstill as meaning "The ride is OVER, there is nothing more going to come of this. You need to put fresh energy in to a fresh project to make anything new manifest. Meanwhile, move on."

Interesting how both 11 and 12 talk about being among groups of people but it's not until they've all gone on a lot of rides and life adventures together that the people start to recognize their mutual dependence and develop 13. Fellowship.

 

[CheersC]

you give me nice insights...because I was thinking to leave all my friendships but I feel like I'm still and standing here without doing anything to move on and really find these new friendships... about love, same thing, there was a hot guy who wanted to get me, but i refused 'cuz i was hurt from his previous behaviour (he didn't show to treat me with respect), and now im feeling stupid because I refused a hot guy. THen there was a friend of mine who looked interested in me, and I liked him too, not seriously though, and he disappeared... He wants me to do all the thing, like writing, inviting and so on... All I feel now is that I really need news, from friendships to love!

 

[CheersC]

so yes the feeling is that everything is OVER

 

[Trojina]

you give me nice insights...because I was thinking to leave all my friendships but I feel like I'm still and standing here without doing anything to move on and really find these new friendships... about love, same thing, there was a hot guy who wanted to get me, but i refused 'cuz i was hurt from his previous behaviour (he didn't show to treat me with respect), and now im feeling stupid because I refused a hot guy. THen there was a friend of mine who looked interested in me, and I liked him too, not seriously though, and he disappeared... He wants me to do all the thing, like writing, inviting and so on... All I feel now is that I really need news, from friendships to love!

In 12 times one isn't valued or even seen by others for who one is. I think you get 12 here because of your attitude to this, it's really 12ish. Like you seem to think you are obligated to accept a 'hot guy' just for the sake of it ?

What the heck for !!? If there is no love don't bother, you aren't worth less than proper love. If you aren't loved and respected don't sleep with them. Also the way you speak it's like you half believe you are an object and he is an object, he is a 'hot guy' so you think it's stupid not to 'have' him. He's not a cream cake, neither are you. The whole ambience feels shallow and unsatisfying and it will do if you try to make relationships in this current sort of scenario you are in.

So let it go, wait. I think 12 says in Wilhelm 'the superior man does not allow himself to be honoured by revenue'. In other words the superior woman doesn't offer herself up for the sake of being able to reassure herself she is sexually active, she waits for better times and better offers !

In 12 one can feel very undervalued by others. The advice is not to go along with this and say 'oh okay maybe I'm not worth much so maybe I should have slept with him just because he wanted to and that's better than nothing' but to quietly decline and go one's own way until the time is more fortuitous for you.

 

[CheersC]

well, i lost an occasion... It wouldn't be that imporant if he treats you shallow until you don't have a relationship with him... the result is that I'm refusing everyone. I'm still with nobody. Wow. Pure 12 I ching... I hope this will change soon :S

 

[CheersC]

I don't have any opportunities actually

 

[CheersC]

I hope these fortuitous times arrive soon, because I feel like I deleted the only chances I had XD

 

[rosada]

Although the specific lines do not apply when you get an unchanging hexagram they can give useful insight on how to handle the situation. The lines of hexagram 12 describe the Standstill and also what one needs to do to get things moving again.

 

[CheersC]

Although the specific lines do not apply when you get an unchanging hexagram they can give useful insight on how to handle the situation. The lines of hexagram 12 describe the Standstill and also what one needs to do to get things moving again.

How?
My sexual life is dead. I hoped for someonr attractive to revive it but... i'm only clinging to the past opportunities lost due to way too rigid morality.
:| how long does the standstill last?

 

[diamanda]

Your original question here was:
I asked if AT LEAST I would have some kind of short affair

If you would like to know how to find something more substantial, you'd need another cast.
If you'd like to know when, I highly recommend setting a specific time in your question.
I know it's hard to be patient, but please don't lose your cool.
Concentrate on concrete questions and proceed with a good strategy

 

[rosada]

Stagnation does not change automatically. Effort must be put forth in order to end it.

 

[CheersC]

That's right.
I've been alone and isolated from the rest of the world, like, for 2-3 weeks
I have no friend to go to parties with, and if i do, they always have someone different while I keep being abstinent XD to be honest. Very very difficult.

It's been almost a month from the original cast - when should I re do it? Without asking something more substantial (because in that case, I would ask specifically for someone)

You are all very good with I ching, I hope to become a reader like you all are!

 

[CheersC]

hello forumians