Shall I invite her again? 38.1>64

[MrKind]

Hello friends, hope you are well. Several weeks ago I invited colleague from my work (she no longer works there) for a cup of tea, as we had a fairly good connection. I sensed she is somewhat damaged/hurt but she has a good heart so I was curious about whether we can become friends. She unfortunately is very, very closed in her upper chakras and can't read people well- she spent more time with toxic people at our work, regrettably. She is married and there's no sexual attraction from both sides, so it was just an ordinary cup of tea. I listened to previous I Ching reading who said I shall go and meet with her which was a bit against my own will. So I did. The meeting went okay, but she was again very closed... it was Friday evening and we both had a day off but she wanted to talk about work... and it just confirmed my earlier suspicions that at the end of the day, there's really nothing ''for me'' in this relation apart from me ''entertaining her''. I asked I Ching whether I should invite her again? And got:

Hexagram 38.1>64

After a week or two, she meet with my other friend at the gym and asked ''How I am?'' (she asked her rather than me) also told her that ''the contact between me and her was cut off'' - in reality the way I see it is that I stopped talking to her over the FB and she did nothing to continue our relation. From experience I know those kind of people who never do 50:50 in a relation and always wait for you to do all the work. This doesn't feel right to me. Also, she recently recommended very toxic girl from my work to her hubby, who referred her for interview to a very high profile company position. This also feels wrong to me. My interpretation is that I should forget about this relation and that I Ching wanted to tell me that I should *always* listen to my intuition. But maybe I am missing something and reading that wrong? What do you guys think?

 

[Trojina]

Why not start your interpretation based on what Yi actually says, not what others say it says but the actual words.

Hilary's translation of the actual words. Not her commentary note, but her translation.

'Regrets vanish.
Lost horse, no running after it, it returns of itself.
See hateful people,
No mistake.'

Okay what do these words suggest to you ? It isn't talking about intuition, it's speaking quite plainly here. Look at the 2nd line, that's clear isn't it ? It's very clear.

 

[MrKind]

The note about listening to intuition was connected with the reading I received before this one (which I haven't cited here)

My interpretation is that I should forget about this relation and that I Ching wanted to tell me that I should *always* listen to my intuition

I should make this more clear to avoid any confusion. So, I think that regarding the current situation and result I believe that "My interpretation is that I should forget about this relation" and regarding the previous one I mentioned was "I should *always* listen to my intuition" and that it makes sense as a whole situation is clear now.

 

[Trojina]

Your answer is this 38.1>64

'Regrets vanish.
Lost horse, no running after it, it returns of itself.
See hateful people,
No mistake.'

so I assumed that is what you wanted interpretations of although it speaks for itself without needing too much elaboration I think.

 

[MrKind]

I get it that she will probably contact me again at some point [horse returns of itself] ; ''see hateful people'' - does this relate to her or toxic people around her I am not sure. But I assume the answer is no. Now I wonder whether I should do it IF/WHEN she will contact me back on her own, but thats for another casting.

 

[MrKind]

Trojina, let me explain this for you In the past I asked I ching whether I should meet her for the 1st time. Answer was definitely yes. I haven't cited the exact hexagrams I got, because it was some time ago and I don't have it anywhere by now. Also, I wasn't asking for the interpretation of that previous casting because it was very clear to me. I only mention it to present a little bigger picture on the situation why I've meet with her on the first place at all.

I listened to previous I Ching reading who said I shall go and meet with her which was a bit against my own will. So I did.

Then the meeting happen and I understood with this second present casting advising against inviting her again, that the major lesson from the first casting was to just listen to my intuition. Hope this makes more sense to you now. Sorry, my writing is sometimes a bit clumsy.

 

[MrKind]

I asked the Oracle today whether I should invite her somewhere if /when she will reach out to me first /by herself. Received:

Hexagram 63.2>5

I believe that it also means that I should restrain myself from meeting with her.

 

[angelatlantis14]

Hi MrKind,

I think this is a pretty clear answer, and agree with you that it advises you to not continue contact.

Hex 63 has a number of translations, my favorite one is "From Order to Chaos", but even any other one has the result that things start out well enough but will soon turn into disorder. As you mentioned that this person is very closed up, it is possible that this refers to things under the surface, emotions, expectations etc. from her side that might create a sort of chaos.

I assume that you are looking for friendship in general (maybe even more), and line 2 of Hex 63 (which btw is VERY similar to Hex 38.1 says, stop trying so hard, it will come all by itself - further emphasized by the changing Hex 5 which advises waiting in good cheer.

Hope this helps a bit!

maui

 

[Trojina]

I asked the Oracle today whether I should invite her somewhere if /when she will reach out to me first /by herself. Received: I believe that it also means that I should restrain myself from meeting with her.

Yes this line says not to mind a temporary loss. It's the second answer where you've been told whatever loss you think you have made you need not fret about it and it will return by itself or something even better will come to you.

Don't invite her anywhere, just let it be. 38.1 says there's no harm at this time in communicating with people who appear 'toxic' to you, hateful people. Also don't forget it's 38. In 38 people will have entirely different views of the same situation. You probably cannot judge her motives or psychology very well because she sees things very differently so there has to be room between you for accommodating very different perspectives.

 

[MrKind]

Thank you both Maui and Trojina, in short- yes and yes!We have mostly opposing views on many things. And sometimes you feel you know it underneath but still look for a confirmation from the I Ching, like in this case. I won't continue any relations with her, it would feel forced and I live too long already to not be able to spot when there's something wrong with someone. She has *a lot* of issues underneath her very well built ''professional'' facade, which I assume allows her to succeed at work etc but I saw enough proof (+using my own skills as an empath) telling me that it's not worth to mix with her on any level. I wasn't looking for friendship or love, at this point in my life I am concentrated on myself only. I was rather curious whether I was right about her, and I was - case closed.