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state fo Mind 49.1>31

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goddessliss

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My son rang me a close to midnight talking about how he thinks there is no point in living and he doesn't understand why we are here - this is not the first time and it is usually a trigger that gets these thoughts happening but I also believe he suffers from depression as he chooses not to deal with the things that have happened for him despite my encouraging him to seek counselling etc.

This is the first time though he has really opened up and communicated effectively so that is a blessing in itself however as a mum I am still concerned

What do I need to know about K state of mind Hex 49.1>31

My one thoughts on this are he is NOT ready to make the change yet.


What is the best support I can give K at this time

Hex 35.6>16 Oh gosh have no idea about this one.

thks for your help on this concerning matter

Melissa
 

foxx777

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So sorry to hear you son is having this trouble. I have had similar with my own son, and as mothers it really does get us worried. Counseling and even anti-depressant medicines are sometimes called for. On the other hand, it could be simply the angst of youth.

49 , Radical Change/Revolution. Line 1 is described usually as hiding in yellow ox hide , wrapped up, secret.

Emotional I ching says "before any action one must carefully consider one's intentions." I guess you could discuss with your son, rather than taking action secretly (which you were probably not inclined to do anyway).

H35 is Progressing, bringing to light. The relating hexagram 31 is of course influence: Your own, a therapist's.

This could indicate that the advice of a professional is warranted.

On the other hand:

Line 6 in Emotional i ching says,

"Pushing one's ideals, one attempts to overthrow the state. . . Regrettable."

Perhaps his "depression" is a transition state, not to be forcibly overthrown? It is very hard to advise, as I worry about my own 24 year old son due to such talk, etc.....:( Very best wishes to you and your son.:hug::bows:

 

dragona

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Hello, Indeed he is struggling (49.1)
You are in a position of someone who can offer support and line 6 states that: Making progress with lowered horns-i.e., acting on the offensive-is permissible, in times like those referred to here, only in dealing with the mistakes of one's own people. so I think this says that with him, you can get a bit pushy, make him do as you say in some situations, use your influence as a parent in order to produce some enthusiasm.
Perhaps I am bias because I do believe that a depressed person is not supposed to be left alone to struggle for some sense...it may take too long.
 
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goddessliss

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Thanks foxx777 and dragona for helping with this emotional situation.

Yes dragona I am thinking I need to be a bit pushy although that is not my way but I need him well and certainly not fighting ongoing depression - something I have done all my life and although counselling has helped me process and progress recently I have had enough as spoken about on my recent threads and am really hoping to get it sorted this time - yay for the art therapy, and this site amongst other resources I am using.
But for a 17 y.o. I think they do need their mum or at least someone who can really help them.

It was a beautiful moment when he said - ' I didn't ring J(his brother) cause I just need to hear your wisdom, mum' lol don't we live to hear that from our children. - Liss
 

foxx777

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Thanks foxx777 and dragona for helping with this emotional situation.

Yes dragona I am thinking I need to be a bit pushy although that is not my way but I need him well and certainly not fighting ongoing depression - something I have done all my life and although counselling has helped me process and progress recently I have had enough as spoken about on my recent threads and am really hoping to get it sorted this time - yay for the art therapy, and this site amongst other resources I am using.
But for a 17 y.o. I think they do need their mum or at least someone who can really help them.

It was a beautiful moment when he said - ' I didn't ring J(his brother) cause I just need to hear your wisdom, mum' lol don't we live to hear that from our children. - Liss
I think it sounds like he really trusts his Mom, really is open to your advice and compassion and guidance. :)
 

dragona

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I did not know his age; and was not sure since W. speaks of "one`s own people"..but who is more your own then your child? Also, having the experience, should help him be more receptive of your advices...all in all, to me it looks like it will take some time but good he has you on his side.
 

long yi

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My two cents worth analysis

Your six line layout
49/1 to 31
出生时间:年 性别:Mother of querent 起卦方式:直接指定
起卦时间:2012年06月02日03时51分
神煞:天乙—丑未 福星—寅 日禄—寅 羊刃—卯 驿马—申 桃花—卯 华盖—戌
干支:壬辰年 乙巳月 甲午日 丙寅时
旬空:午未  寅卯  辰巳  戌亥


六神  伏神    坎宫:泽火革          兑宫:泽山咸
         【本 卦】           【变 卦】
玄武       ▅▅ ▅▅ 官鬼丁未土     ▅▅ ▅▅ 官鬼丁未土 应
白虎       ▅▅▅▅▅ 父母丁酉金     ▅▅▅▅▅ 父母丁酉金  
滕蛇       ▅▅▅▅▅ 兄弟丁亥水 世   ▅▅▅▅▅ 兄弟丁亥水  
勾陈 妻财戊午火 ▅▅▅▅▅ 兄弟己亥水     ▅▅▅▅▅ 父母丙申金 世
朱雀       ▅▅ ▅▅ 官鬼己丑土     ▅▅ ▅▅ 妻财丙午火  
青龙       ▅▅▅▅▅ 子孙己卯木 应○→ ▅▅ ▅▅ 官鬼丙辰土  
Revolution means making possible changes for a good future.

Your son is in line 1 of hexagram 49. This month he is not sure about himself, but this situation will continue for sometime (at least 6 months or more) to come (line 1 卯木 sits under the next few months of luck).

You are in line 4 (water) and try to help him (line 1 wood).

If it is a career matter, wait for 官鬼丁未土 应 line 6 of hexagram 31. Events start to change by July 6 (counting 30 days, may be after Jul 20).

Line 1 + line 4 of hexagram 49 + month of Jul 6 & thereafter 未土 = wood. The wood character is strong. Mother and son will work together to achieve results.

One female is under line 3 of 49 under another guy. The female and the guy may be both someone he knows. Mind his own business, the two has nothing to do with his future. Guy may move, female he likes or a friend.

Line 1 & 6 of hexagram 31 are both career/academic lines. Everything has something to do with his immediate future.

For your son: career or academic, + another female (someone’s girl). I think that is the picture. Your question is not specific to the Oracle.

Miscellaneous: Hexagram 31 is a sexual attraction, intercourse type of hexagram. In this analysis, change for him is necessary to achieve success. However, the outcome is also like people having sex. When sex is over, the person achieves objective, buy he is really tired. There is no good or bad news to this hexagram. Your son is capable. You can encourage him in Jun/Jul and help him in Jul.

He is sitting on the line of green dragon. Too young to fly. His time will come if he changes. He is smart enough to talk to you. Just to clarify, the sex is an analogy for the situation, not meaning that he has an affair with someone. Not to worry.

One additional comment: 官鬼 officer/ghost line can mean illness. As mom, please check that he is mentally sound. I do not see anything bad on this issue in your hexagram.
 
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goddessliss

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Revolution means making possible changes for a good future.

Your son is in line 1 of hexagram 49. This month he is not sure about himself, but this situation will continue for sometime (at least 6 months or more) to come (line 1 卯木 sits under the next few months of luck).

You are in line 4 (water) and try to help him (line 1 wood).

This makes sense - he chose to leave living with me to go live with his dad(thinking he could save his dad from being an addict), which then turned into a domestic violence situation. Now he has left living with him and is living with his mate I still think he is far too young to have done this and it is now beginning to show. Brave perhaps but he is not mature to understand the implications thereby putting himself through unnecessary struggles but although we did speak about the implications as a teenager he did not want to listen

If it is a career matter, wait for 官鬼丁未土 应 line 6 of hexagram 31. Events start to change by July 6 (counting 30 days, may be after Jul 20).

Line 1 + line 4 of hexagram 49 + month of Jul 6 & thereafter 未土 = wood. The wood character is strong. Mother and son will work together to achieve results.

Yes at the moment he is definitely looking for a career - an apprenticeship or traineeship. And I always help and support him as best I can. :)

One female is under line 3 of 49 under another guy. The female and the guy may be both someone he knows. Mind his own business, the two has nothing to do with his future. Guy may move, female he likes or a friend.
This may be his father and his partner who are both addicts - although my son does not like the female at all - she has commited abusive volatile offenses towards him.


Line 1 & 6 of hexagram 31 are both career/academic lines. Everything has something to do with his immediate future.

For your son: career or academic, + another female (someone’s girl). I think that is the picture. Your question is not specific to the Oracle.

Maybe my son's girlfriend although she is not very supportive of him and plays mind games with him.

Miscellaneous: Hexagram 31 is a sexual attraction, intercourse type of hexagram. In this analysis, change for him is necessary to achieve success. However, the outcome is also like people having sex. When sex is over, the person achieves objective, buy he is really tired. There is no good or bad news to this hexagram. Your son is capable. You can encourage him in Jun/Jul and help him in Jul.

He is sitting on the line of green dragon. Too young to fly. His time will come if he changes. He is smart enough to talk to you. Just to clarify, the sex is an analogy for the situation, not meaning that he has an affair with someone. Not to worry.

One additional comment: 官鬼 officer/ghost line can mean illness. As mom, please check that he is mentally sound. I do not see anything bad on this issue in your hexagram.

I think just depression and teenage angst - he says he feels stupid about some of the decisions he has made I said you are thinking like a 17y.o. - he thought that was funny but he said it made him feel better cause of course he is 17 and man do we make random decisions when we are that age.

Thankyou very much for your help - it has helped me feel a little easier about him and his situation. - Liss
 

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