What are my ex feelings about me? Hex 42.2 to 61

[Somnus]

Greeting friends, Ive recently been through a separation with my ex, we had a very intense relationship that he decided to end two months ago, but we kept seeing eachother, I was distressed all the time because he was very controlling and jealous since we were no longer "partners" but only "dating", I always stood firm in my commitment and I was constantly reafirming to him that I would never be with someone else and all I was thinking about was fixing the relationship together in a proper way... although he never fully commited, lied about not talking to other girls (he was apparently doing this with a lot) and I started to feel very depressed and paranoid, which caused many struggles and missunderstandings and things became really toxic. It was not only a lack of commitment on his side but he was also very unstable about his feelings, he would keep saying I was the only woman he could spend his life with, talked about a future and living together but then backed up and didnt even want to take off his "single" facebook status. Some days ago we met for the last time, I had a crisis and started crying due all of this, we had an argument and he blocked me saying he didnt want us to talk anymore. Today I asked the I ching:
What are his feelings about me? Hex 42.2 "Increase" to "Inner Truth"
How does he think about the relationship? Hex 23.5 "Desintegration" to "Contemplation"


I don´t know if the Hex 42 refers to renewed feelings of love and commitment that he might have been blocking or an increase in the negative feelings about splitting apart, also the views he has on the relationship on Hex 23 make me wonder if this is about a desintegration of the past or of the entire relationship. Thanks a lot!

 

[redoleander]

42.2 maybe implies seeing you as valuable? The thing about this line, sometimes I’ve received it when giving something beneficial up. Someone’s increase. Not necessarily mine. It’s a beautiful line and I think it definitely does hold sweetness. Of course you are of great value; the line reflects that. I’m not sure if it expresses anything about commitment though. “The way is open” might mean he sees you as receptive and willing.

23.5 that you are one of many lovers or interests. String of fish. I think this line can mean there are others and maybe that there always will be, it’s part of the nature of the situation.

 

[kestrelw1ngs]

I see a pattern of hex 61 showing up in difficult/unstable relationships in threads, and in my own experience it has come up during endings (that to be fair, had potential to be renewals). Even in questions about love situations that ended up being manipulative & full of lies.

Its a sweet hexagram, but maybe less a green flag than an admonishment "to thine own self be true" - what is the inner truth of the situation? What encompasses all of the perspectives compassionately, but is not wish fulfillment? Those questions would be the context of Yi's answer.

If redoleander's interpretation holds, maybe he does see you as valuable & willing but not what he wants, he is confused or wants many lovers, or can't decide. Your willingness won't make him commit.

Having been through a parallel situation very recently (almost to the T, with the ex not committing, wavering between planning a future and not wanting to turn off potential suitors by being open about us), Yi aside, my own two cents is perhaps he thinks you are "too good" for him, are offering more commitment than he wants. With 42.2...he may see blocking you as for your own good.

Who knows what he feels? He won't speak to you and tell you.

Either way, you have been through a painful situation commiting to someone who did not reciprocate your level of commitment. I hope you find some gentleness with yourself as this experience resonates in your life.