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What holds for my future after a really difficult past

ragini

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Hello,

I have often lurked on the forums here, but this is the first time I am posting here.

I have been going through a rather rough period of failure upon failure upon failure from the past 12 (twelve) years. I am honestly coming to the end of my wits, because even now almost every aspect of my life seems in a state of disarray, without any ray of hope.

I asked the Yi, "I have gone through a rather difficult past, what does the future hold for me?"

I get 8.4.6 -> 12

Doesn't seem very encouraging :)

The Yi speaks about holding together. What should I hold onto ? Also the second hex '12' seems to suggest that things are not going to improve.

Since the Yi suggests that I cast again, to determine if I possess sublimacy, constancy, and perseverance. I did so, and got 35.1 -> 21

This seems positive, but together the two readings seem to be a bit contradictory, or does it mean that I possess the constancy, but luck is not going to favor me, so it would be better to depend on my own inner worth.

Thanks for reading and for your help.
 

rosada

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8.4.6 sounds to me as if you have particularly suffered from relationships - partnerships? Jobs? - that have ended. Or perhaps it just means that you have life memories in general that it's now time to release and let go.

Whatever, re-read Stagnation including the lines. It's actually a very positive hexagram about rebuilding your life from scratch.

You might also get value from looking at your astrological chart. Note which planet is at the closest to 30 degrees of the sign it's in. This is your planet of last degree. It is the last planet the moon makes an aspect to as it moves through the signs. As this planet will be the last planet the moon connects with, it will tell you how things tend to end for you. If you have Venus as your planet of last degree, things tend to end with some sort of sense of justice or fair play - like you might get fired but were intending to quit anyway and somehow everyone parts on pleasant terms. If Uranus is the planet of last degree things end in sudden unexpected ways - like maybe they were going to fire you or you were going to quit but before any of that could happen there's an earthquake and the job no longer even exists. Anyway, when you see your pattern it can kinda help you get in alignment with your fate. Perhaps it would be helpful to ask the I Ching, "What is this pattern I keep seeing repeating in my life - and how can I best align with it?"

Rosada
 
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rosada

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35.1 > 21

Before you can Progress is there something in the past you need to take care of? Something left undone? A borrowed book to return? A thank you note to write?

-rosada
 
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rosada

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Thinking about this some more..

I'm thinking 8 was telling you to ask again, asking if you are ready for a new life, a new set of responsibilities - which you did and I think 35.1 is telling you you cannot make progress, you do not yourself feel moving forward because you still have one foot rooted in the past > So you need to 21. Bite Through those old chains or complete the old promises, or learn the old lessons or bury the old trash or so something so that you can move forward confidently saying My Life Starts Now, rather than everything having to relate to something that happened so long ago that no one can do anything about it. Then you will be ready to form new alliances - you'll be able to bond with people that are a reflection of all that's good and alive in you now, rather than with a bunch of other wounded warriors who mirror your past.

Bless the past, acknowledge that someday you will look back and smile, and someday you will not look back at all. And then focus on what is right in front of you to do right now. Make it your starting point.

rosada
 

gnar

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I totally had this thought, and still go into these thoughts once in a while. Before I share my thoughts on the hexagram, remember that failures are not usually our fault. The real problem is where you are at while things are happening, and especially when the end of those times come. When things settle and everyone gets their share of the pie -- so to speak.

In any case, 8. 4,6 is reminding you not to attach yourself to the good and bad in your life, but instead to build yourself inside. Search for your talents, skills, innate ability, and develop them. It also tells you to find a purpose, a goal, a concrete goal you can work towards, achieve, and focus your energy and talents into, etc.

Each person develops differently and at different rates. You must learn though to be objective in your dealings, and think from the outside looking in. Not from the inside looking out. Manage, but keep to a safe distance.

In any case, hexagram 12 here reminds us that you must not let bad things or evil people get to you or grab you by the throat. In times of difficulty, it is especially important to realize that there is an abundance of chaos, sadness, blame, haunting regrets, etc etc. The best of us continue to do their thing at these times, but are extra careful knowing that there are bad influences constantly trying to get their way in.

So, this is more about an advice on how you must handle things in the future, more than what the future brings you. Remember, if you allow others to shape your life, you are giving up the power to build the life you want.

just my two cents. :)
 

ragini

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Hello rosanda,

Thank you very much for taking the time and effort to write such a wonderful analysis.

35.1 > 21

Before you can Progress is there something in the past you need to take care of? Something left undone? A borrowed book to return? A thank you note to write?

-rosada

I am not sure, if there is anything left to be completed. I think I may be at a time when the past needs to be released in entirety.

8.4.6 sounds to me as if you have particularly suffered from relationships - partnerships? Jobs? - that have ended. Or perhaps it just means that you have life memories in general that it's now time to release and let go.
-rosada

Yes, I have suffered from relationships in most spheres of life - close relationships, & partneships, at times clients, and at times friends. You are absolutely right about having memories that need to be released.

Bite Through those old chains or complete the old promises, or learn the old lessons or bury the old trash or so something so that you can move forward confidently saying My Life Starts Now, rather than everything having to relate to something that happened so long ago that no one can do anything about it.

I think this is really, really what I need to do. With the weight of the past, it is going to be impossible for me to be able to create a good future. I do agree, but I also find the burden of the past to be very difficult to shake of. Repeated failure and rejection gets internalized to such an extent, that it starts affecting present situations, leading them to failure, and it just becomes a terrible vicious circle. I almost feel like divine grace, is the only way I will be able to shake of the past and make a new beginning.

I know there is much I can do by way of making a positive contribution to this world, and I have always attempted to do things that help the universe in some way. Even if it's a small contribution, I have tried to make it with the best possible sincerity. However, sometimes it almost seems like one needs good karma, even to be able to do good things :)

Thank you once again rosanda. You have pointed me to a direction, and for my part, I need to understand how I can release the past and the internalized feelings of inadequacy and failure, so that I can start making a new beginning.
 

ragini

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Hello rosanda,

You might also get value from looking at your astrological chart. Note which planet is at the closest to 30 degrees of the sign it's in. This is your planet of last degree. It is the last planet the moon makes an aspect to as it moves through the signs. As this planet will be the last planet the moon connects with, it will tell you how things tend to end for you.

Rosada

I cast a chart at cafeastrology dot com, and it shows two planets which are at a very degree:

venus at 25.29 in Aries
mercury at 25.31 in PIsces

I am not sure if it matters, but the chart says "Pisces ascendant Taurus"

Thanks
ragini
 

ragini

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Hello gnar,

Thank you for the great advice.

In any case, 8. 4,6 is reminding you not to attach yourself to the good and bad in your life, but instead to build yourself inside. Search for your talents, skills, innate ability, and develop them. It also tells you to find a purpose, a goal, a concrete goal you can work towards, achieve, and focus your energy and talents into, etc.

Coincidentally, I was thinking of Vippassana meditation some time back, In Vippassana meditation there is great importance not to attach ourselves with anything and not to react to things. Rather to observe and let go. I agree, I need to learn not to attach my self to good or bad things, but simply to accept them as is... maybe as an influence which came in my life to teach me some lesson.

I agree, I need to search for those talents in me which will help me express and interact in ways that are most natural to me. Though at this point I am honestly feeling a bit weary to do that self exploration. It feels like I need some rest, so I recharge my resources, and get ready for moving ahead again.

Manage, but keep to a safe distance.

That's great advise. Not being able to keep a safe distance has led me to many a misery :) Something I definitely need to keep in mind.


So, this is more about an advice on how you must handle things in the future, more than what the future brings you. Remember, if you allow others to shape your life, you are giving up the power to build the life you want.

just my two cents. :)

Thank you, I need to and I definitely take charge of my life. It might take me a little time to heal the past, but I will...
 

rosada

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Thank you for the kind words!

As to your planets of last degree, Venus in Aries, your enthusiasm to get new things started seems to be twarted cause just as you are looking to open new doors, the moon connects with your Mercury in Pisces suggesting things ending with a kind of melancholy sadness and a tendency to keep memories active, thus fogging your ability to attract a new kind of love. Maybe you could write a best selling somebody-done-somebody-wrong song! That would honor the past and get you heading in a brand new direction!

rosada
 
S

sooo

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Hello,

I have often lurked on the forums here, but this is the first time I am posting here.

I have been going through a rather rough period of failure upon failure upon failure from the past 12 (twelve) years. I am honestly coming to the end of my wits, because even now almost every aspect of my life seems in a state of disarray, without any ray of hope.

I asked the Yi, "I have gone through a rather difficult past, what does the future hold for me?"

I get 8.4.6 -> 12

Doesn't seem very encouraging :)

The Yi speaks about holding together. What should I hold onto ? Also the second hex '12' seems to suggest that things are not going to improve.

The key to all this, as I see it, is in 8.4. You ask, "what should I hold onto?" I'll ask, what do you hold onto? Is it your past failures and misfortunes, or is it hope and vision for positive goals? According to 8.6, you have no head, no mind, no leadership to hold to, therefore no goals, no hope, no vision. So, before you can turn your standstill and misfortune around, you need to adjust your head, and then hold outwardly to those new visions you create in your mind, do something to accomplish your goals of prosperity, whatever prosperity means to you.
 

gnar

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Coincidentally, I was thinking of Vippassana meditation some time back, In Vippassana meditation there is great importance not to attach ourselves with anything and not to react to things. Rather to observe and let go. I agree, I need to learn not to attach my self to good or bad things, but simply to accept them as is... maybe as an influence which came in my life to teach me some lesson.

It's more of like playing a game of SIMs. My mentor says, it's better this way, since it enables you to gain a broader sense and the need to evaluate things as facts and systems rather than random events.

I agree, I need to search for those talents in me which will help me express and interact in ways that are most natural to me. Though at this point I am honestly feeling a bit weary to do that self exploration. It feels like I need some rest, so I recharge my resources, and get ready for moving ahead again.
Self-exploration happens with action, more than anything. Or after action. The same mentor told me that each day must be a closed book, and every new day must be a start from the end point reached yesterday.

As such, he clearly stated that reflection for each day's movements were necessary to clear the mind of any stress, and so enable one to utilize more of one's mind into the present circumstances and situations.



That's great advise. Not being able to keep a safe distance has led me to many a misery :) Something I definitely need to keep in mind.
Thank you, I need to and I definitely take charge of my life. It might take me a little time to heal the past, but I will...
It's human to feel terrible and happy. After all, why would we try to avoid pain and desire pleasurable things, right?

What separates us from being dragged by events, is when we are able to be thankful after the fun, and be able to say, "okay, a clear mistake. Let's try again, and see what we can do tomorrow."

It's more like being responsible, but never the owner.


I'm glad to have shared this reading with you. :)
 

ragini

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The key to all this, as I see it, is in 8.4. You ask, "what should I hold onto?" I'll ask, what do you hold onto? Is it your past failures and misfortunes, or is it hope and vision for positive goals? According to 8.6, you have no head, no mind, no leadership to hold to, therefore no goals, no hope, no vision. So, before you can turn your standstill and misfortune around, you need to adjust your head, and then hold outwardly to those new visions you create in your mind, do something to accomplish your goals of prosperity, whatever prosperity means to you.

Thank you sooo, what you say is very right, though it had not occurred to me as yet.

I *am* holding onto the past failures and not holding on to a vision for my future.

I also realize that I do not have a very clear picture of what I want out of life right now. In the past I have almost always had a vision, but maybe destiny mostly had other plans. Right now I am bit scared to create a vision, which destiny may again derail. Feel like at the moment I may not have the resources to deal with more misfortune... so I guess I am just gliding along without any real plan or direction.
 
S

sooo

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I hear you, Ragini. Odd as it seems, very few of us can define clearly our goals, other than vague, general goals, such as feeling better, happier or more peaceful. And past disappointments do throw cold water on creating fresh visions. I think part of entering new phases of life require us to reshape our goals, because what once made us happy may no longer work. That's why I ended with "whatever prosperity means to you." We may be trying to live up to our old standards, and that's no longer satisfying or possible. So it's important to create new or renewed standards, which are attainable. Sometimes it's best to start with small, seemingly insignificant goals, but which are foundational, like: Today my goal is to be happy, or, today my goal is to do something to make someone else happy. Or, today I will exercise, go for a brisk walk and breathe deeper.

The most fundamental meaning for 8 is 'keep it together', and our head has to be engaged to create that condition; even in gaining insight into the true nature of reality (Vipassanā), the mind needs to awaken, not be lulled asleep, nor dwell on past misery. A personal mantra can help with that. For me, when on walks, it is most gratifying to remind myself (in my head) repeatedly, I am that: the road, the sky, the mountain, the horse, the dog, the people in that house, the bugs that crawl, the birds that fly, I am life and I am death too - I am that. That gathers all together (45), and then it's up to me to keep it together. May not sound like a grand goal, but it gets me through the day, even difficult days.

Best to you.
 

anemos

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I also realize that I do not have a very clear picture of what I want out of life right now. In the past I have almost always had a vision, but maybe destiny mostly had other plans. Right now I am bit scared to create a vision, which destiny may again derail. Feel like at the moment I may not have the resources to deal with more misfortune... so I guess I am just gliding along without any real plan or direction.

Hi Ragini,

you have no idea how I can relate to what you say. I do understand your fear to create another vision that may lead to another disappointment. Its hard to believe that this time things will go well. You said your are running out of stamina, so how to fight for something ? I have been there and there were moments I felt that universe is not my ally in a challenge I'm going through and the scary part was I couldn't stand on my feet , literally and metaphorically. there were times I wanted to quit, stop trying for everything let the difficulties win and lost sight a some really good things happening. The temptation to quit was strong, and the situation in general , all those difficulties , obstacles could give a good excuse to quit, but i couldn't do that. I have no idea how to fight it, where to find the strength needed . the only thing i knew is that I really didn't want to quit. I read your h12 that way too. To whom/what you say "yes" and to whom/what you say "no".

I had a surgery and doctors did a great job. On the 3rd day they ask you to walk. its pretty painful but it is important to do that. Its only a few steps but its the beginning of the patients work. Doctors cant offer anything more. its the patient that will decide that part is going to play.


what Sooo wrote reminded me of all this situation and especially the day I had to walk. To my bad luck I had a sever sciatica that day. I didn't got any medication for that because we wanted to avoid a medicine that wasn't the best thing to do because of the surgery . Doctors said I need to rest and the same doctors said I had to walk. To be honest, I didn't want to walk under that condition but on the other hand walking , apart from doctors orders had a personal significance for me. take charge, to commit to my part of work. So , although I thought for a while to what i wanted to hold on (i.e to the bad luck of another obstruction or to the opportunity to mend something ) I decided to give a try. This is why I said earlier that 12 , to me, feels like a yes or not we have to say.

I don't know if what i say helps in any way but I felt like sharing that with you.

best wishes
maria
 
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anemos

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Cross posted with Sooo.

Sooo, for his H8, has a very inspiring image. Two little kids holding hands while sleeping. This image is where my mind travels when I need something to hold on. And when there is no one around I hold my two hands. There is always something to hold on. Just sometimes we forget their existence.
 
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ragini

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It's more of like playing a game of SIMs. My mentor says, it's better this way, since it enables you to gain a broader sense and the need to evaluate things as facts and systems rather than random events.


Self-exploration happens with action, more than anything. Or after action. The same mentor told me that each day must be a closed book, and every new day must be a start from the end point reached yesterday.

As such, he clearly stated that reflection for each day's movements were necessary to clear the mind of any stress, and so enable one to utilize more of one's mind into the present circumstances and situations.




It's human to feel terrible and happy. After all, why would we try to avoid pain and desire pleasurable things, right?

What separates us from being dragged by events, is when we are able to be thankful after the fun, and be able to say, "okay, a clear mistake. Let's try again, and see what we can do tomorrow."

It's more like being responsible, but never the owner.


I'm glad to have shared this reading with you. :)

Thank you so much for sharing gnar.

Each day being a closed book is such a wonderful thought. I have been thinking, that I should write down my thoughts, and experiences for the day every night, be thankful for what it bought to me and what it taught me, and then release it so that the next day can start fresh.
 

dilson

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A positive message

Ragini,
We all have things to be thankful for, for instance, the existence of this forum that allows us the opportunity to help other members of online clarity and get help as well . The words of the more experienced members are always inspiring.
I have a lot to learn, but I felt the need to address some encouraging words.
Remember that you are alive!
You have friends with whom you can count on.
You are able to overcome any difficulty if you believe that you can and look for the right means to do it and that is when talking to the right people makes all the difference to clear our minds to see our own situation better and how to deal with it more harmoniously.
This is my humble contribution to you. I hope it helps you somehow.
Take good care of yourself!
Dilson
 
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ragini

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I hear you, Ragini. Odd as it seems, very few of us can define clearly our goals, other than vague, general goals, such as feeling better, happier or more peaceful. And past disappointments do throw cold water on creating fresh visions. I think part of entering new phases of life require us to reshape our goals, because what once made us happy may no longer work. That's why I ended with "whatever prosperity means to you." We may be trying to live up to our old standards, and that's no longer satisfying or possible. So it's important to create new or renewed standards, which are attainable. Sometimes it's best to start with small, seemingly insignificant goals, but which are foundational, like: Today my goal is to be happy, or, today my goal is to do something to make someone else happy. Or, today I will exercise, go for a brisk walk and breathe deeper.

The most fundamental meaning for 8 is 'keep it together', and our head has to be engaged to create that condition; even in gaining insight into the true nature of reality (Vipassanā), the mind needs to awaken, not be lulled asleep, nor dwell on past misery. A personal mantra can help with that. For me, when on walks, it is most gratifying to remind myself (in my head) repeatedly, I am that: the road, the sky, the mountain, the horse, the dog, the people in that house, the bugs that crawl, the birds that fly, I am life and I am death too - I am that. That gathers all together (45), and then it's up to me to keep it together. May not sound like a grand goal, but it gets me through the day, even difficult days.

Best to you.

Thank you sooo for all your insightful comments and suggestions.

Small, insignificant goals are really the key to re-building. Success with these goals will will give me the much needed confidence that things *can* indeed go well in my life.

'I am that' is great advise and I have already started following it...
 

ragini

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Hi Ragini,

you have no idea how I can relate to what you say. I do understand your fear to create another vision that may lead to another disappointment. Its hard to believe that this time things will go well. You said your are running out of stamina, so how to fight for something ? I have been there and there were moments I felt that universe is not my ally in a challenge I'm going through and the scary part was I couldn't stand on my feet , literally and metaphorically. there were times I wanted to quit, stop trying for everything let the difficulties win and lost sight a some really good things happening. The temptation to quit was strong, and the situation in general , all those difficulties , obstacles could give a good excuse to quit, but i couldn't do that. I have no idea how to fight it, where to find the strength needed . the only thing i knew is that I really didn't want to quit. I read your h12 that way too. To whom/what you say "yes" and to whom/what you say "no".

I had a surgery and doctors did a great job. On the 3rd day they ask you to walk. its pretty painful but it is important to do that. Its only a few steps but its the beginning of the patients work. Doctors cant offer anything more. its the patient that will decide that part is going to play.


what Sooo wrote reminded me of all this situation and especially the day I had to walk. To my bad luck I had a sever sciatica that day. I didn't got any medication for that because we wanted to avoid a medicine that wasn't the best thing to do because of the surgery . Doctors said I need to rest and the same doctors said I had to walk. To be honest, I didn't want to walk under that condition but on the other hand walking , apart from doctors orders had a personal significance for me. take charge, to commit to my part of work. So , although I thought for a while to what i wanted to hold on (i.e to the bad luck of another obstruction or to the opportunity to mend something ) I decided to give a try. This is why I said earlier that 12 , to me, feels like a yes or not we have to say.

I don't know if what i say helps in any way but I felt like sharing that with you.

best wishes
maria

Hello maria (anemos),

Thank you for sharing your story. I am really sorry that you had to go through so much pain. I hope you are well now.

My situation is indeed very similar to what your's was. I do not want to give up, but I don't have the stamina to fight either. So I am just holding on, making sure I don't slip down, but also unable to climb up. And as sooo suggested, having small goals may be the key to moving up.

I have had a fair share of health issues too. At one point it became so painful, that it was actually hilarious. I was wondering to myself, "Is this really my life, or am I watching a motion picture ?" But magically that moment allowed me to put myself out of my own life and look at it as a third person. It really helped me pull through several years of weak health and pain.

I agree with you. The issue is that of saying 'yes' or 'no', and I just have to say 'yes' to a better future, even if it may seem difficult to attain right now.

Thanks for sharing your story maria, and hoping for lot's of good luck and positive energy in your life.
 

ragini

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Ragini,
We all have things to be thankful for, for instance, the existence of this forum that allows us the opportunity to help other members of online clarity and get help as well . The words of the more experienced members are always inspiring.
I have a lot to learn, but I felt the need to address some encouraging words.
Remember that you are alive!
You have friends with whom you can count on.
You are able to overcome any difficulty if you believe that you can and look for the right means to do it and that is when talking to the right people makes all the difference to clear our minds to see our own situation better and how to deal with it more harmoniously.
This is my humble contribution to you. I hope it helps you somehow.
Take good care of yourself!
Dilson

Hello Dilson,

Thanks for the encouraging words. I agree, there is so much to be thankful for. This forum with all it's wonderful people, and the great people in my life.

Sometimes when we are bogged down, the mind gets a bit overwhelmed. But I totally agree, that talking with the right people makes the task of getting out of darkness and back into the light a lot easier.

Thanks for sharing and good wishes to you too.
 

anemos

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My situation is indeed very similar to what your's was. I do not want to give up, but I don't have the stamina to fight either. So I am just holding on, making sure I don't slip down, but also unable to climb up. And as sooo suggested, having small goals may be the key to moving up.

.

Only the Duracell bunny has unlimited stamina ;). we human , sometimes get tired .... :)

I have had a fair share of health issues too. At one point it became so painful, that it was actually hilarious. I was wondering to myself, "Is this really my life, or am I watching a motion picture ?" But magically that moment allowed me to put myself out of my own life and look at it as a third person. It really helped me pull through several years of weak health and pain.

.

Can relate to that. :) I had such an experience very recently. A magical moment indeed.

8.6 leads to 20 I think what you say fits to 20.6

Contemplation of his life.
The superior man is without blame.

Thank you for your kind words and wishes.

Take care :hug:
 

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