What if I do X to achieve my goal? 4.1.2.4.6 > 51

[elizabeth]

I actually asked two related questions regarding approaching the same goal.

What if i do Y to achieve my goal? (which is to continue on the same path and also wait quite some time, as that path requires) 30.3 > 21

and What if i do X to achieve my goal? 4.1.2.4.6 >21

I am confused based on the reading results which of these is safer, a more sure thing, better, etc. I am not clear on the meanings of the hexes in this context (i could not find much on 30.3 at all, only a couple of threads).
I gathered 30.3 is...accept the present, dont desire change per se, dont lament either.

For the special hex 4 (!) I have this:

4.1 The child you grow now will be a parent later; the beginning is crucial; if the root is spoiled the tree can't grow.
4.2 Removing ignorance...anything is possible now. Create a space for nurturing.
4.4 Acting without having experience/not up to the task/dont follow the crowd. Also if you're tangled up in anothers' business you wont be appreciated (by them i guess?)
4.6 Dont fight yourself internally, collaborate.

So now I will add, both hexes have to do with starting a family ie having a child again... what doesnt make sense is line 4.4 (would suggest dont go that route) and 4.6 would suggest taking route Y instead of route X...so now i'm very not clear what is best here...

 

[precision grace]

Might there be an unconsidered option? both resulting in 21 make me think that some essential truth is being overlooked..

 

[newlife123]

Z is missing.

 

[elizabeth]

In all seriousness, "Z", or the unconsidered option, is to "wait and see" [hope for a miracle basically]... but given the goal which has serious time urgency/pressure, I've not considered that option seriously...

 

[precision grace]

actually I realise now the title has the correct sequence (4 > 51) that I didn't pay attention to.

Still, I'd say neither of these options sound all that great tbh. Also, I would suggest that the unconsidered option is really probably something you truly wouldn't have even thought about. Do me a favour and ask an open ended question, i.e., What is the best course of action for me to take at this time.

 

[elizabeth]

Ok, "What's the best course of action for me to take at this time?"

44.2 coupling >33 retreat (!)

line 2: ‘In this basket there are fish – not a mistake. Not fruitful to entertain guests.’ or The second line, undivided, shows its subject with a wallet of fish. There will be no error. But it will not be well to let the subject of the first line go forward to the guests.
also
"The fish is in the bag. No error. But it is not for guests. There is a difference of opinion about the interpretation of this text. The fish can be seen as a wily, untrustworthy influence that must be kept confined. But it can also be a desirable catch that should be shared with others. Not to share would be unwise."

I should say that option Y, which involved the LEAST change and basically staying w/the status quo involves staying with my current partner. I am just struck by the image of "coupling" here...bc it seems to mean the opposite. Retreat...

Do these hexes (44,33) suggest retreat from a relationship?

 

[precision grace]

Ahh. OK, so you will have to forgive me - I most certainly do not intend any upset or anything like that, but this reading would make me think whether you secretly think you are too good for your partner and are therefore looking for an excuse to leave him. Now, please don't get upset, I am not very good at Yi and this is just what I interpret this hexagram to mean but it may not be right at all.

I hope you find out the right answer for yourself and make a decision that makes you happy and is right for you.

 

[elizabeth]

I found this extensive thread on 44.2, it's the only one that explains it in this context.

http://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/friends/showthread.php?4731-44-2-gt-33-your-thoughts-please

A few quotes of note:

Does not further guests...He'll just contaminate every part of your life.
... Avoid this person or you will have only yourself to blame.


"Either way, the gist seems to be that however good it is to have a fish, it's not good enough to entertain guests. Don't socialise, don't invite him in, don't make a formal commitment that he will be part of your family and your life." (from Hillary)

and

"I don't agree that this means you should 'keep away from this person as he will only cause trouble for you'. The Yi says nothing more than it's not advantageous to be in touch with this person now. 'Not advantageous' is not the same as the 'trouble' you see in the line."

and Trojan:
" i think the idea was this was a good omen for partnership but not for settling things as in marriage etc because these rites were not to be performed yet. I think it was along the lines of there is something in the relationship but now is not the time to make it official or public. Can't find that thread now so may have got this wrong - anyway i don't think its as cut and dried as either you reconcile or don't reconcile. "

 

[newlife123]

In all seriousness, "Z", or the unconsidered option, is to "wait and see" [hope for a miracle basically]... but given the goal which has serious time urgency/pressure, I've not considered that option seriously...

I am serious. I feel that Z is an uncalculated or a hidden obstacle.

 

[elizabeth]

newlife -- Ok interesting...I thought you meant the other way around first. So you mean Z is an OBSTACLE and not an OPTION? that changes the meaning here.

Z -- as far as I can see,, and maybe i'm not seing everything here, means to just wait and leave it in God's hands. Bc the other two options are essentially me making change in one of two directions. I am 99% sure I need to end the relationship I'm in given the behavior of this man towards me following the loss of our child last week. But the question then is what to do next. Y would mean taking other action, sort of "plan b" that is far ffar less than ideal but my only other viable option, the only thing i CAN actively do now. Z would be just wait and see, leave it up to fate and God's hands. The problem with that is I have a time bomb ticking and I can't rreally wait and see.

So in this context are you seeing that Z would *not* be good to do ? ie that i SHOULD take some action here?

 

[newlife123]

Z is what you haven't factored in yet. Inside you already know which action to take.

 

[elizabeth]

I don't believe at this point in waiting for fate bc that didn't help me the past 20 yrs. So I am proceeding now with option Y, bc it's the only viable option I see at this point...Staying with him (X) and waiting it out is not healthy for me and will only bring more pain, frustration, and will destroy me.

I still have zero idea what Z is....

 

[hilary]

Elizabeth, I'm so sorry for your loss.

I think the idea of Z-as-obstacle came from your 30.3 reading leading to 21 - which is about 'biting through' something in the way of unity and effectiveness. In the context it appeared in, with 30, I think with 'accepting the present' you are already dealing with Z.

I wouldn't say 30.3 says not to 'desire change', though -
‘In the clear light of the setting sun,
If not beating a pot and singing,
Then you will be making the lament of great old age.
Pitfall.’
It just says change happens, something is naturally coming to an end, as days do; you can either celebrate determinedly or you can sink into depression hankering after the past.

Sounds like you already know Y is your way to go - perhaps the reading's talking about the spirit in which you embrace the change?

 

[elizabeth]

Thank you Hilary, for your sympathies, and thanks too for the comments here (I always feel honored when you pop in on a thread!)
Hmmm well change has come, much to my dismay. And there's no rewinding or reversing it, sadly. Y is the way to go but Y is something I dont want to do -- there is a lot wrong with option "Y". But...but, I feel it's my only option, my last resort, and if i DONT do it, i will look back 5 or 25 yrs from now and regret not doing it. But I hate that it's my only option.

Trying to get into a better spirit to embrace the Y path is most likely what I should do but...ugh. I am not sure I have that strength right now. I'm going thru the motions and that's about as much as i can muster...