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kincadefoster

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I'm in my mid thirties now and have never been in a relationship that lasted longer than about 8 months.

I'm feeling the clock ticking, so to speak...

"I shouldn't need to be perfect to be in a relationship, what's my next step?" 28.3 > 47

This time I'm not going to ask a lot of questions, just 1 and think about the answer for a while...

Right now, it feels as if I've reached a time where everything in my life was moving along smoothly and like a freight train and then suddenly the brakes have been put on and everything is at a crawl...
 

pocossin

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What's my next step?
28.3 > 47


I shouldn't need to be perfect to be in a relationship

If any of us were perfect, we wouldn't be in this plane of existence.

I'm feeling the clock ticking, so to speak...

But at my back I always hear
Time's winged chariots hurrying near.

There is only one thing to do. Make your needs known. Tell your friends you want a partner, and let them play matchmaker. Tell your siblings and cousins and coworkers. Let them help you. Go where the kind of partner you want is likely to be. 28.3 is an excellent casting for this situation -- aging and loss from time in the third line. Hexagram 47 is the hexagram of sacrifice, not that you are putting yourself on a block but that you need to open your heart just a little that another may enter.
 

kincadefoster

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I've read through this and it suggests withdrawing from the world and that I WON'T be able to get help from friends...?
 

canislulu

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Kincadefoster, this is how I understand what Pocossin has seen in the hexagram you cast: I Ching is telling you that perhaps the problem is that you have been trying to do this on your own without support. Yi is not advising you to "set up alone and withdraw" but rather telling you that to continue doing this would be a pitfall. Don't try to be the noble one standing alone.

28.3 "The ridgepole buckles. Pitfall." i.e., you need to set up some support under your ridgepole by telling your friends, siblings, cousins, and coworkers that you want a partner and need some matchmakers. Let people know you need support. (The ridgepole is the highest horizontal timber in the roof. Without support it will buckle..)

I am grateful for Pocossin's reading of your cast as I am not sure I would have seen it so clearly as he has.

And his suggestion to go where the type of partner you want to have would be is good as well. The lower trigram of H28 is Sun (gentle, penetrating) and with the 9 at the 3rd place the trigram changes to Kan (water flowing like a river). Flow on out there into the world.

As Pocossin says, H 47 is the hexagram of sacrifice. I also think of it as the "actions speak better than words" hexagram. Don't just talk love, do love through your actions.
 

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