Why is he so inconsistant with me? 54.1.2

[laylab]

Hi Everyone,

I met a man through a dating site who I have exchanged great emails with, had nice conversation and shared pics etc.

He told me that he would come to my city to meet me but ended up not coming for reasons that, after consideration, I saw were quite valid.

So this Monday he called me and talked to me for 90 minutes (he did most of the talking and sounded quite excited) he told me that he would call me more this week because he "was sure that he would want to hear my voice more often". But then instead of calling, he emailed and texted me (not the same to me).

He wrote to me that he is trying to arrange his agenda to come see me and that it is "top priority". But then last night he sent me a mobile msg that he was in Geneva "with friends for the night" (he lives in France). Around 9 am this morning he sent me a mobile message saying "Good morning beautiful lady" I wrote back "why don't you call me to say that? It would have an even nicer effect".

No reply.

In fact he is inconsistent. I once called him and he texted back that he couldn't take the call because he was in Marseille with friends. Sorry but when a man is into a girl, he takes her call even for a minute, even with friends..unless of course, that "friend" is another woman.

So I asked the I ching..

"Why is X so inconsistent with me?"

It answered

54.1.2 The Marrying Maiden

Nine at the beginning means:
The marrying maiden as a concubine.
A lame man who is able to tread.

Undertakings bring good fortune.

Nine in the second place means:
A one-eyed man who is able to see.
The perseverance of a solitary man furthers.

Leading to 16 Enthusiasm

What do you think this means? It's quite confusing.

 

[laylab]

I just asked:

What Should I do?

and got

Hexagram 2.3.4 The Receptive
Six in the third place means:

Hidden lines.

One is able to remain persevering.
If by chance you are in the service of a king,
Seek not works, but bring to completion.

Six in the fourth place means:
A tied-up sack. No blame, no praise.

 

[sophie]

From that draw, I'd say he has a wife.

 

[miakoda]

Laylab:

It can be difficult to understand someone else's motives from a reading, so I won't venture to comment on 54.1.2>16....but in your asking about what to do, I think that the Yi is suggesting in 2.3.4>46 that you approach this from inside yourself (2.3)--letting it play out and watching what happens because whatever is inside the tied-up sack (2.4) and can't be seen right now.

2.4 is a really frustrating line....basically "que sera sera." That could mean that this won't go anywhere, but then again, it could turn out better than you expect--which is why I think that 2.3 holds the action in your reading.

2.3 from the Wikiwing:

"‘Containing within, a thing of beauty: this can be constant.
Maybe following king’s business -
Without accomplishment there is completion.’

‘Containing a thing of beauty within’ or ‘holding a jade baton’. You would hold a jade baton in the presence of the ruler, so this would be a sign you’re on king’s business. The noble one of the oracle has ‘gained a lord’, entered the service of something greater than himself.

‘Jade baton’ or ‘thing of beauty’ – chapter, structure, something formally composed, rules, a constitution. Something that is made, and that is harmonious. You are on king’s business, and this is a sign of your inner qualities. These can be constant and true – like jade, which never tarnishes.

So your inner quality is constant, and you have important work to do – and this doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll have anything to show for it. But when you individually enjoy ‘no accomplishment’, get no kudos, the greater work can still be completed. Maybe your efforts are part of something on a scale beyond your comprehension." (Hilary)

All the best,

Miakoda

 

[enmedio de la tierra]

54 is a woman taking the initiative; 2 is a woman following other's initiative.
Seems he likes you, but you scare him a little bit. Don't push him too hard.

 

[laylab]

Thank you for the replies and thoughts. I think that enmedio de la tierra and miakoda both made a lot of sense too.

To clarify things I simply sent him a msg asking "are you single actually?" Later that day he called me to reassure me that he is indeed single and said, "I hope you are single too!".

I decided to leave the ball totally in his court. He told me that he could call me very late on Sunday night when he got back from Switzerland but I told him it would be too late. He also said that he would come "either easter weekend or the weekend after". So since he has been so inconsitant so far and I have been so open, I decided to back off and see what he does.

So I wrote to him that Easter Weekend doesn't work because I am going away with friends (which is true). That was Sunday night.

I didn't contact him since.

Finally today (Wednesday) he wrote to me that he is in another city for work, that he hopes a I am fine and he wants to come the weekend after Easter then.

I will respond to him that I am "looking forward to it and to showing him my city etc".

Then I just need to let him take the lead I guess?

So to get some confirmation from the IC I asked:

Question 1: "Give me advice about X please?"

Answer: 19 Approach : unchanging

Question 2: Will x really come to my city to see me?

Answer: Obstruction 38.2.6

Six in the second place means:
The king's servant is beset by obstruction upon obstruction,
But it is not his own fault.

Six at the top means:
Going leads to obstructions,
Coming leads to great good fortune.
It furthers one to see the great man.

(this makes sense because he has told me of problems he is having with work (severe issues) and that he has to coordinate weekends because he has his daughters 2 weekends a month)

How should I behave to draw X to me ?

Hex 48.5 The Well (leading to Hex 46 Pushing Upwards)

Nine in the fifth place means:
In the well there is a clear, cold spring
From which one can drink.

So what could this mean?

What does the Answer #1 "Approach" actually say? That this will be the start of a new relationship?

And how can I behave like The Well with him?