will i get over this one? Hex. 16.4

[bruce]

Hey guys,

These past 5 months or so I've been trying to get over a girl unsuccesfully, it's just so hard because it's unresolved in my mind. I really want to just let this go, but I am constantly filled with anger because of the way she treated me. I just want some peace from these feelings.

I asked : Will I eventually be able to let her go and move on? hexagram 16.4
Really don't get this line, my aspirations will be fullfilled?

 

[Annamaria]

Hi Bruce,
To me it seems that if your aspirations that you name are wishing to be friends with her then you should with your enthusiasm be able to fulfill it. I guess she wishes herself that you could get some peace of mind. Btw, what did she exactly do?
Best wishes,
Anna

 

[bruce]

No, we aren't speaking to each other, but we do see each other regularly on a certain website. I just want to get over her completely, I don't want to be friends.

She turned her back on me when I needed her even though she knew what I'd done for her in the past. She then continued to badmouth me to certain people.

 

[blue_angel]

Initially I would say your reading says "yes, you will get over her, with time". At the same time of looking at this reading, I wonder, are you meant to "get over her". Or perhaps the reading is referring to something else in your life, someone else. I say this because its a very good reading.

I see the reading as hexagram 2, through learning to be receptive of others and follow hexagram 16, what is unpredictable yet great, you line 4 gather together in the right time. It has an elegance and grace to it. Like dancing to music. Or dancing with time.

So if the reading is pertaining to her, are you sure she bad mouthed you? Are you sure she turned her back on you? If this is your perception, I wonder what may be going on with her, that may or may not have anything to do with you.

Perhaps in time you will then gather together with those you need to or gather together yourself...

 

[bruce]

I don't know, this is confusing. The reading is pertaining to me and me wanting to get over her. I'm pretty sure she bad mouthed me, and I'm pretty sure she turned her back on me as well.

 

[Annamaria]

I don't know, this is confusing. The reading is pertaining to me and me wanting to get over her. I'm pretty sure she bad mouthed me, and I'm pretty sure she turned her back on me as well.

Maybe if you tried to forgive her would help you to get over it.

 

[Trojina]

Hey guys,

These past 5 months or so I've been trying to get over a girl unsuccesfully, it's just so hard because it's unresolved in my mind. I really want to just let this go, but I am constantly filled with anger because of the way she treated me. I just want some peace from these feelings.

I asked : Will I eventually be able to let her go and move on? hexagram 16.4
Really don't get this line, my aspirations will be fullfilled?

No you won't be able to move on without talking to her about all this. 16.4 advises you let go of doubts and be pro active...this is no time to be sulking or licking wounds, it won't work and you won't get over anything....because actually, if you communicated properly with her, there wouldn't be anything to get over ! The reason you can't let it go is because your subconscious knows better than you do there is more for you here

Communciate ! Now ! Don't be passive...16.4 is very proactive, no room for sadness or believing bad things of someone ...

I don't know, this is confusing. The reading is pertaining to me and me wanting to get over her. I'm pretty sure she bad mouthed me, and I'm pretty sure she turned her back on me as well.

Nope, nothing confusing about this reading at all. 'pretty sure' is misguided....no use breaking with her without being totally sure and you are not. Find some trust again with her, talk to her....

 

[bruce]

I already tried, she doesn't want to speak to me because I think she can't handle the truth about her actions. She runs away from things.

 

[Trojina]

Oh...well the reading says there's no doubts here....don't give up, be lively about this, be inventive.....find ways to make her laugh or something.

I think you need to make up with her anyway ...so don't blame her anymore, just try to have some fun conversations. There's no room for sadness here really...you may need to change your mood to get through this. Are you moping about ? Don't. Energise yourself.....get your spark back, feel happy

 

[bruce]

No doubts with what?

To be honest I really don't think she cares at all, I've tried. Iw as her ****ing lapdog, and as soon as I wasn't needed I was thrown away. I can't even be sad about this, I'm really filled with hatred. I want to get over this because it's bothering me in daily life.

 

[blue_angel]

Sometimes I see 16 as enthusiastic illusions we create ourselves. I agree with Trojinas take on this. You ask for help and guidance, get good readings and advice, then decide to be stubborn in following the advice or even attempting to have an open mind or a willingness. Either way you'll work out what you need to in time. Or... you wont.

If you really "wanted" to get over her, it would be easy. Simple. You aren't speaking, so you would go on with your life, cake walk. Of course this is only my own opinion. And I'm sure not worth much. But... have you heard "not forgiving someone, is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die" will find the author later. Having hatred is not healthy, and there is no way of moving on with hatred. Only to create a bitterness, injure your own heart further. And how much has hatred to do with ego.

 

[Trojina]

Well another way to see it is yes you will get over it if you can let go of doubts about getting over it...or maybe look to your friends for support to help you

er but to be honest you wouldn't still hate her if you didn't still love her and what is 16.4 saying about that ?

with this line it really is up to you to make things happen. If this is totally over then you need to focus on your sense of enthusiasm for life....if you are busy and full of enthusiasm there is less time to hate.


Other than that I have no answers for you...but you still obviously want something from her. Perhaps if you can admit your own strong feelings of attachment to her, really feel your feelings you could let go. Beneath the anger there must be sadness.

16.4 specifically says 'doubt not'....you may be angry at having lost faith. The answer really encourages you to have faith again....This is a warm encouraging answer whatever it applies to....it's not a line of cold hatred

shake it off and start bouncing man

 

[blue_angel]

Your "I'm pretty sure she bad mouthed me and turned her back on me" is not sure at all. In your attempt to contact her, did you reach her? How did you contact her? Did she respond? What was her response? If she didn't respond, what are some reasons she may not have responded? Besides your perception you have right now? And then again, why speculate? Why not wait for the right time to see the truth and how it unfolds?

 

[bruce]

Thnk you Trojina. I do have feelings for her obviously because I cannot hate a person for nothing. If she meant nothing to me I wouldn't have hated her this much for what she did. I just have a hard time getting over her, it's been 5 months now...jesus. I guess me being stuck with my health problems at home doesn't allow me to have much fun, that would be a good distraction.

Blueangel, I'm not going to go over that here.

 

[Trojina]

Thnk you Trojina. I do have feelings for her obviously because I cannot hate a person for nothing. If she meant nothing to me I wouldn't have hated her this much for what she did. I just have a hard time getting over her, it's been 5 months now...jesus. I guess me being stuck with my health problems at home doesn't allow me to have much fun, that would be a good distraction.

Blueangel, I'm not going to go over that here.

Given your situation do you think you are angry and frustrated about other things too, not just her, and maybe your mind has focused it all on her....as minds tend to do, they find a target for their woes.

If this were a general answer to the anger you feel then it's a very positive answer. It is telling you to find ways to be proactive, boost confidence, reach out. How can you do that if ill at home ? I don't know but seems to me this reading shows there are things you can do.

For myself when receiving 16.4 I've noticed it is a time when it's easy to get others to believe in you if you are keen to do something....but you have to display your enthusiasm/wish to proceed/your ideas/your feelings. It's not a time to keep your thoughts to yourself. Up till now maybe things have not met a good response....but it's important now to realise this is a time you can draw things together.....whether with her or not.

Even if we do not know how to apply the reading exactly it is a good auspice for you to build confidence and trust. Maybe there are others too you could reach out to, plans you might make.....inklings of ideas, things you want to try ......? I don't know, but it's a good reading to stick in your pocket to be going on with as it certainly isn't telling you to despair. I think perhaps if things generally felt better then your anger to her may naturally dissipate as your attention goes to more constructive future orientated plans.

 

[bruce]

Yeah, that's part of the reason. When things are rough in your life, you tend to hold on to something of which you think can bring you satisfaction. I know this, but it's still hard, especially because of my health problems, things are really tough. She turned her back on me during this period, because she said things were going great in her life and that she didn't need me anymore, forgetting everything I ever did for her i the moments that she needed me. I guess it's easy to forget about someone when things are going great in your life.
It doesn't take away the fact that she did me wrong though, she knew what I did for her but just never cared. I just feel very defeated by this experience and everything else in my life. I don't want to associate myself with people that treated me like that.

I will have to try my best to get over her, but it's hard since I'm incapable of having fun or something like that at the moment. There may be some things I want to try...will probably do that.

 

[loveslimes]

Wondering if there is an update to this situation? I have had an experience that sounds quite similar, and throughout it, I received 16.4 many times over. I would receive it mostly when I was angry and asking questions such as, "I'm going to end it (this relationship), should I?" And like you, the answer of 16.4 confused me, as it can be taken in two different directions, one telling you not to doubt yourself; the other, telling you not to doubt the other person or people. However, like you, I knew that someone had done me wrong. And in fact, as the situation came to a close, I had several tarot readers tell me to cut the person out of my life. So I happen to believe that 16.4 can in some cases mean, Don't doubt yourself, you deserve better friends, and you will get them once you put forth the enthusiasm to meet new people." I wonder if this is how things panned out for you. I wish you well. It is terrible to feel let down by the people you had cared about. Love Limes.

 

[Tohpol]

So...is your user name "love Slimes" or "Love Limes"? The latter is great improvement...

 

[Trojina]

Love Ball
Oh Slimey Love Ball
Dance with me
Our love will be Sublime
Or
It may be Slime

 

[Trojina]

Wondering if there is an update to this situation? I have had an experience that sounds quite similar, and throughout it, I received 16.4 many times over. I would receive it mostly when I was angry and asking questions such as, "I'm going to end it (this relationship), should I?" And like you, the answer of 16.4 confused me, as it can be taken in two different directions, one telling you not to doubt yourself; the other, telling you not to doubt the other person or people. However, like you, I knew that someone had done me wrong. And in fact, as the situation came to a close, I had several tarot readers tell me to cut the person out of my life. So I happen to believe that 16.4 can in some cases mean, Don't doubt yourself, you deserve better friends, and you will get them once you put forth the enthusiasm to meet new people." I wonder if this is how things panned out for you. I wish you well. It is terrible to feel let down by the people you had cared about. Love Limes.

16.4 requires one to be pro active...a bundle of joy and enthusiasm....then people stick to you like flies. So 16.4 isn't time to be passive....it is time to let yourself shine out happily.

Play in the Lime Light
Not the Slime Light