work conflict

[barbaloot]

36.6 to 22
Hi there, I asked the i ching for advice in relation to dealing with a confrontation at work. Basically this lady has been criticising me in team meetings or across the room so everyone could hear every day for about a week and a half. Before I approached her I asked for advice and the i ching gave me 7.2.3 to 15. I don't think the approach went too well. It ended up with her yelling at me and then our boss organised a meeting with the two of us for early next week.
I didn't organise my thoughts very well (as 7 might advise) before I approached her. So I asked for further advice in how to deal with the conflict, since having the confrontation and I got 36.6 to 22. What do you think this last reading implies?
Barbaloot

 

[pocossin]

How should I deal with this conflict?
36.6 > 22

☷ ☶
☲ ☲

Hexagram 36 suggests a defensive position; 22, social graces. Overall judgment: You should follow the proprieties of your work situation exactly.

36.6
Six at the top means:
Not light but darkness.
First he climbed up to heaven,
Then he plunged into the depths of the earth.

Could you ask for a transfer to another department of the company?

You do not say why this woman is attacking you. It is important to know whether her criticism is occupational or personal. If she is criticizing your work performance and her criticism is justified, then you will have to change to accord with her wishes. If your work performance is up to standards, then your boss is responsible to see that she does not interfer with your ability to carry out your work.

If her attacks are personal (especially if ethnic, sexual, cultural, or related to a handicap) then you may have legal rights to a non-threatening workplace. You might ask that your attacker be required to submit her complaints in writing, both to you and to your boss.

 

[barbaloot]

Hi Pocossin, she is criticising aspects of my work performance that are very very minor Eg. once not writing the time I would be finished with a client on the whiteboard. This was bought up three times in front of others. I'm new and I didn't know and hadn't been told this was required. My issue is the number of times criticised in a short period and the way it has been delivered, ie each time in front of other people. I guess 36 indicates I can expect initial difficulties. But what does the 22 outcome indicate?

 

[barbaloot]

Oh yeah I can't transfer in the job I am in unless the job is advertised, I formally apply and compete with others for the job

 

[patro]

the imagine of both trigram suggest me another answer to the question.

36 obviously talk about you... how you live your situation... the way to close you in your self, interior resistance while the negative forces are venting.
22 show that you must react to the situation by responding to her in a funny but not offensive way.
showing the futility of her exaggerated and blatant dissent. by trying to be sympathic to the other.
22 talk about attractiveness, how other look at us and judge us for what we show, etc....

 

[pocossin]

Hi Pocossin, she is criticising aspects of my work performance that are very very minor Eg. once not writing the time I would be finished with a client on the whiteboard. This was bought up three times in front of others. I'm new and I didn't know and hadn't been told this was required. My issue is the number of times criticised in a short period and the way it has been delivered, ie each time in front of other people. I guess 36 indicates I can expect initial difficulties. But what does the 22 outcome indicate?

22, as I understand it, refers to skill in dealing with others graciously. If the failing is yours, you should have apologized. What seems minor to you may be major to others, for example, if the lady is responsible for work scheduling or billing. If she made an example of you, it may be that others have been lax in this matter and she wanted to send a warming to them.

You have a background in psychology, and I must ask: Do you have a history of conflict with female authority figures? I don't want a reply, but I hope you will carefully consider the question.

 

[Trojina]

Barbaloot is it this job where you have the conflict ? http://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/friends/showthread.php?t10166

just wondering how that reading turned out...if you got the job and was it this one you are in now ?


The 2 readings may have some kind of connection

Re 36.6 the nearest I get is the idea that those who have had the upper hand lose it. What has been threatening you, making you feel undermined or inhibited just loses all its hold over you so I'd take the answer as not giving you advice but telling you that that which oppresses you will soon spontaneously be overthrown, burn itself out..it really has no further substance. In 36.6 you think this person/situation has power but its a superficial appearance (22) and easily vanquished. I'm just thinking you won't have the problem much longer.

I could be wrong as not sure exactly how you put the question but thats how 36.6 generally seems to manifest..its a mysterious line though !!

 

[barbaloot]

Thanks for the replies.

Trojan, I didn't get that job from the previous thread.

Poccosin, I have been bullied by a couple of people over my career (20 years) though males, not females. I don't mind receiving criticism and I have apologised for my mistakes - my gripe was with the way she presented it to me and the frequency of the criticism.

Carolyn

 

[Tohpol]

Thanks for the replies.

Trojan, I didn't get that job from the previous thread.

Poccosin, I have been bullied by a couple of people over my career (20 years) though males, not females. I don't mind receiving criticism and I have apologised for my mistakes - my gripe was with the way she presented it to me and the frequency of the criticism.

Carolyn

I think it's basically saying hide your light and remain centred. It's a case of gritting your teeth somewhat, but this period can be ridden out and it's preferable you do that otherwise you'll make things worse. If you don't succumb to the negative emotions this situation is stirring up, you'll emerge from it stronger and wiser. Just as things are reaching what we perceive to be the limit of what we can take, very often they change into their opposite.

 

[patro]

in my experience the IC answer to any of us in different ways!
the IC like the water suit our nature and our character.
it's answer cold be playful, intuitive, ironic, blaming, sensitive etc. but always mirroring our nature.
this communication way, is more evident if we use more than a interpretation book...for example a traditional one and a second with occidental modern interpretation.
I think that is very important to notice the way how the IC interact with us. this is a very important advice to follow.
so barbaloot... consider this advice in your trying understanding what the IC is telling you.
:bows: