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misunderstanding? 45.4.5, 22.1

literunner

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Hello,
I'm wondering about a possible rift with someone I care about and how to proceed. I get the feeling my friend is upset because typically when upset, X shuts down and withdraws which is what seems to be happening here. I've tried to contact X but not gotten a response yet. If there's something to mend, I want to do so. If it's a matter of giving X space and being patient, I can do that.

I asked for general direction about best action now, eg should I keep waiting to hear back etc?
45.4.5>2
Gather together for unselfish reasons, for reasons that benefit everyone and all will be well. Trust needs to be restored. Follow, don't lead.

What does X want me to do about her?
22.1>52
I'm stumped. I looked at several different interpretations and can't find any that seem to fit...walking without the carriage, leading to inner stillness? Move simply, without artifice, and stay centered? Hmmm...need help with this.

What do I need to know about X's (non-responsive) behavior now?
54.2.4>24
Which I take to mean, there's been some disappointment but with waiting, things will turn around.

Look forward to your insights...thank you.
:bows:
 

kinglylife1

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Can you give a little bit more insight into the situation. The 45th hexagram talks about people gathering together in communities. It's related to the 8th in form. The 8th talks about people being held together by a leader, but moreso in private relationships. Since the 45th hexagram is speaking of a larger gathering, can you give some details as to how you and this person are acquainted and what sorts of activities or environments play into you coming together and that may have an impact on the dynamic of the relationship?
 

literunner

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about gathering together

Can you give a little bit more insight into the situation. The 45th hexagram talks about people gathering together in communities. It's related to the 8th in form. The 8th talks about people being held together by a leader, but moreso in private relationships. Since the 45th hexagram is speaking of a larger gathering, can you give some details as to how you and this person are acquainted and what sorts of activities or environments play into you coming together and that may have an impact on the dynamic of the relationship?

Thank you for the response, kinglylife1.
We don't interact in person much as we live in different cities, so a long distance relation. We talk via email, messaging and phone--and sometimes these are not ideal because you can't see the other face to face.
Maybe the Yi is advising me to focus on group activities with other friends now, closer to home?
 

kinglylife1

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Interesting

That is very interesting. I'm going to go around a little bit in an effort to make my reply with clarity. In the 13th hexagram we learn that relationships are a form of fellowship. Fellowship should be conducted in the open and should be accessible.

The 4th line of the 45th hexagram describes a person who is aware that his/her purpose is to go out and help other establish and understand the importance of unity, be able to learn what life is about and come together with others. In such a situation, it becomes quite different to go out and about to try to get "converts" such as missionaries like to do. On the contrary, people will come of their own accord and it will be this person's job to aid they who have come so that they can be accepted and integrated into the group. Perhaps it's not a group situation at all as the I Ching has a tendency to use the images to try to describe what a situation is like. A good example of what I mean can be found in the 29th hexagram, The Abysmal. It says water goes onward and fills in all places. Its a metaphor that talks about how we should deal with fear. If you have a fear of ridingin an elevator, and you apply the counself of the 29th hexagram, you will go ahead and ride the elevator and gradually get over your fear, just as water is unhindered in filling a ravine. It's the imagery that is being used to describe a moving onward despite what you feel are drawbacks. I'd look at this 4th line as counsel as to what you should be doing.

The 6th line is fairly clear. You'd like to align yourself with this other person but you are being misunderstood. Your good intentions are going unnoticed. But it says that this you become sad and begin to lament. Feel no sense of false pride and allow yourself to experience whatever emotion is real at this stage. In a healthy manner, express this emotion and the other person may see that you are being sincere. It just may happen that you can come together. All-in-all, fear not your feelings. Far too often we are taught that we should suppress them. This leads us to living with less integrity and failing to come to grips with our feelings and then we begin to cheat others of the opportunity to see who we are. Ironically, we end up relating with people who have already built walls around themselves and they are the ones that misunderstand us simply because they haven't learned to come to grips with themselves. Don't fall into this trap of self-deception. Be true to yourself and your sincerity will shine through.
 

kinglylife1

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I can't believe I neglected to speak on the 24th hexagram. Please accept my apologies. 24, The Return, talks about something really deep that most never discern from the reading. Do you meditate? If you don't, then start doing it daily. It's going to be the way that you influence the situation. Develop some strong affirmations for yourself regarding the peace and power that you know resides in you. Visualize yourself as light that attracts others easily to you. Visualize yourself attracting this other person to you. Keep your breaths really slowwwwwwwww. Deeply in and slowly out. This is the path you are returning to in the 24th hexagram. That's the best way I can state it. Make this a daily practice and you'll see the situation turn in your favor. If you begin to feel sad in your meditation, then cry there. Let the universe hear your hearts prayers and it will engage all benevelent forces to work on your behalf. Be blessed!
 

literunner

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much thanks

Hi,
Thank you so much for your response about Hex 45 and how the Yi uses imagery :)
You mean line 4 could mean there is a role for me, to help the other understand the importance of uniting and being accepted? I can see there might be cause for this considering some of our talks prior.
And your reading of line 6 is brilliant--however...I drew line 5 in this case :D It's funny but parts of 6, whether just a lucky accident from the universe, also apply here. So thank you for that.
Do you have an insight into line 5 of 45 as well?
 
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literunner

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good advice re: meditation

I can't believe I neglected to speak on the 24th hexagram. Please accept my apologies. 24, The Return, talks about something really deep that most never discern from the reading. Do you meditate? If you don't, then start doing it daily. It's going to be the way that you influence the situation. Develop some strong affirmations for yourself regarding the peace and power that you know resides in you. Visualize yourself as light that attracts others easily to you. Visualize yourself attracting this other person to you. Keep your breaths really slowwwwwwwww. Deeply in and slowly out. This is the path you are returning to in the 24th hexagram. That's the best way I can state it. Make this a daily practice and you'll see the situation turn in your favor. If you begin to feel sad in your meditation, then cry there. Let the universe hear your hearts prayers and it will engage all benevelent forces to work on your behalf. Be blessed!

Thank you for addressing this aspect of my reading as well. Your kind and loving energy is much welcomed and received! Yes, I do meditate and will put focus on this area to clear up any unhealed heart and intention energy around this person and situation, as you've described. Thank you.

Last week, when the rift was most fresh, I asked the Yi for some overall calming advice and got:
61.2.5.6 >24
so I think the 24 is important here, as you've noted.
Thank you for reminding me and encouraging me to return to my own strength, peace and power within. Your advice has helped calm me. Blessings!
:bows:
 

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