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Hexagram 43 for relationship potential

DirkGrave

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Good evening!

I was wondering if you could help me out with this one. I think it's a positive message but I am a pretty negative and insecure person by nature so I tend to second-guess everything potentially positive that might be coming my way and I want to make sure I'm on the right track here. Basically I have met a person at work that I have developed feelings for and I am getting mixed signals from her. Now these mixed signals might just be me denying the obvious because as always I have to put stones in my way and make things complicated thinking it's probably too good to be true. The specific question was "How can I begin a romantic relationship with X" and the answer was Hexagram 43.

Thank you all in advance for your time and I wish you a great week!

Greetings from Ibiza,
 

iams girl

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Hi and welcome Dirk,

My experience with hex 43 was also during a time of mixed uncertainty and hope about a situation. What I found extremely helpful for navigating things from Hilary's commentary in the Resonance Journal was, "it will serve you better to focus with clear intention on what you’re moving towards, rather than what you’re reacting against." And, from the James DeKorne site was, "we get an image of quietly rectifying a situation without revealing our purpose or strategy." Best wishes.

Ibiza, sounds lovely!
 

moss elk

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"How can I begin a romantic relationship with X" and the answer was Hexagram 43.

Hi Dirk,
you may not like what I'm going to say.
43 is about (peacefully)
getting rid of someone.
 

DirkGrave

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Hi Dirk,
you may not like what I'm going to say.
43 is about (peacefully)
getting rid of someone.

First of all thank you for the contribution! I never looked at it that way and not that I'm trying to argue because I don't want to accept your answer but I looked at it from a completely different angle, which is part of why I came here for advice and different perspectives. I thought it basically meant I have to get over the negativity and insecurity and it will happen.
 

DirkGrave

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Since I have been reading that asking the right question is the key to this I decided to reformulate it and just ask for a clear picture of my relationship with her and where it is headed. Result was 31.6 changing to 33. Thoughts about that? Superficial relationship? Stop trying because it won't work out? Or am I missing something in the reading? I mean 33 is "RETREAT"...
 
D

diamanda

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How can I begin a romantic relationship with X
43 unchanging

By being decisive, and letting her know what your intentions are.
However, Moss Elk is right, this hexagram is about getting rid of "the female".
So I'm not so sure she's worth your time and effort.

ask for a clear picture of my relationship with her and where it is headed
31.6 > 33

She's not really attracted to you, she's just all empty superficial talk I'm afraid.
Even if you're truthful, in a 43 manner style, she's not that type of truthful person.
Sorry to say this but the whole scenario (43, 31.6 > 33) doesn't sound romantic at all to me :(
Hope I'm wrong...
 

iams girl

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Hi Dirk,

Hex 43 is about ousting a dark element (the yin line at the top) that is spoiling things. Since the initial question was about yourself, I still think your insight about removing your second-guessing and doubting tendencies was what was reflected in the answer. So, I'd suggest it means clarifying for yourself what you want, making win-win plans, and moving forward without having expectations. For example, finding a number of things that draw out your passion, let's say going on a bicycle tour, going to a museum show, a cooking class, or going to a carnival or other local event. As you discuss these positive experiences with her, it may open the door to her interest in joining you at some point. It's win-win because you'd be enjoying the activities whether she is there or not. If she joins you, great, and if not, it's still really your own company that counts the most and a way of furthering your own well-being regardless.
 

iams girl

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In other words, imo, beginning a romantic relationship starts with beginning a romantic relationship with yourself so to speak.
 

iams girl

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For 31.6>33, the question really has two parts, first, about an image of the relationship and second, about where the relationship is headed. I see the relating hexagram, hex 33, as showing a reserved, guarded situation at the core of things. Your self-described being a "pretty negative and insecure person by nature" may be implied there along with issues she may have and issues you might have with each other's natures. For 31.6, it's true that it means rather superficial talk; however that's a natural place to start for people who don't know each other well. It also may be that she's simply trying to draw you out a bit with joyful banter. The question is whether it stagnates at that level or not. I'd say that leads back to hex 43 and how well your actions paint a picture of yourself rather than words.
 

moss elk

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I knew a woman who was a mildly flirty talker, with pretty much everyone. Yi described her as 31.6. There wasn't much behind it, just sort of a habit she developed.
:flirt: :flirt: :flirt: :flirt: :flirt:
 

DirkGrave

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Thank you very much for your time and insight to both of you! I will report back with developments as soon as there is something to say, we only met a couple of times so far and it's probably too early to tell.
 

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