Hi all!Could really use your guidance and expertise if you so oblige. I am in a bit of a standstill of my own making and am feeling very nervous about my relationship. A bit of background first as I don't think advice can be gleaned without it. I have been married for 7 years, we have three children. I met my husband when I was very young, he is nearly a decade older. He is a good man, a great provider and an excellent father, but he is so different from me in every way. Due to my youth I allowed him to hold all the power in our relationship and basically altered myself to appease him. [I know but I was being a 'good' wife] About 1 year ago, I began to feel a lot of inner urgings and angst which lead me to step into my own power. I realized I could no longer not be 'me' in order to have peace in our marriage. 'Me' being an adventurer, extrovert, surfer, artist ect. My husband prefers to stay home and watch TV, even on date nights, if we never left the house he'd be content. This makes me feel suffocated. I have talked to him about this, I am very open and honest with him. I am also seeing a counselor. The problem is, he is unwilling or maybe unable to change as our basic temperament and approach to life is extremely different. Around 6 months ago I met someone whose very presence makes me feel alive. I have been very cautious not even allowing a real friendship to develop as it would confuse me more and my commitment to my family and marriage is very important, but my heart wonders. I tried just ignoring the attraction at first, then cord cutting, meditation, release exercises etc but it's to no avail, he still has a strong effect on me which. I believe he has crossed paths with me for a reason, even if for it to only spur me to some sort of action. Or maybe he is the manifestation of what I long for in my marriage, I don't know. But now I find myself even more confused and guilt ridden. I want to do the right thing for myself, my husband and my family. But I don't want to wake up when I'm 80 and feel like I let life pass me by because I was afraid or too cautious. If you could please shed some light on this to help me move to the next step in this growth period I would be eternally grateful. I'm having a hard time being objective. Q: If I choose the path of committing fully to my husband.Hex: 15.2.3-7I take this to mean I can find happiness, if I remain humble and unassuming. If I don't ask for too much and moderate my desires. Also, in order to find happiness I'll need to formulate a plan. Q: If I choose the path of following my heart and leaving my marriage. Hex: 2.4.5-45I take this to mean that I can find happiness but through being receptive. The time for action is not yet but instead if I follow the urgings of my heart and do the work at each step I will arrive at happiness. It's urging me to remain receptive to the flow rather than assert myself. I feel confused though because It feels like both are decent. So now what? Anyone see one path as better than he other?

Hi chelsa,

If I choose the path of committing fully to my husband 15.2.3 > 7
Plain words, a solid conclusion, and a struggle (together with others fighting for the same cause).
The hidden line (46.3) is a bit worrying, as in fighting for something that's not really there.
Sounds to me like this decision will be a constant struggle.

If I choose the path of following my heart and leaving my marriage 2.4.5 > 45
Line 2.4 says no error, but no praise either. A tied up sack, we don't know what's in there.
2.5 shows dignity. If you follow this path, it will be with dignity.
The hidden line (16.5, a love-sick heart) is very worrying.
And 45 is about joining a community (?) and renewing one's weapons.

I'm sorry to say that none of the two options sounds to me like a super happy end.
If I personally had to choose between an army and a community, I'd go for the army.
As the army are all fighting on the same side at least, while communities are volatile entities.
But that's a personal choice.
Wishing you good luck.

diamanda said:

Hi chelsa,If I choose the path of committing fully to my husband 15.2.3 > 7Plain words, a solid conclusion, and a struggle (together with others fighting for the same cause).The hidden line (46.3) is a bit worrying, as in fighting for something that's not really there.Sounds to me like this decision will be a constant struggle.If I choose the path of following my heart and leaving my marriage 2.4.5 > 45Line 2.4 says no error, but no praise either. A tied up sack, we don't know what's in there.2.5 shows dignity. If you follow this path, it will be with dignity.The hidden line (16.5, a love-sick heart) is very worrying.And 45 is about joining a community (?) and renewing one's weapons.I'm sorry to say that none of the two options sounds to me like a super happy end.If I personally had to choose between an army and a community, I'd go for the army.As the army are all fighting on the same side at least, while communities are volatile entities.But that's a personal choice.Wishing you good luck.

Click to expand...

********Thank you Diamanda for your thoughtful reply. It is sincerely appreciated. As of yet I’ haven’t made a decision in either direction. I’ve just been focusing on trying to get to peace. My heart has been so unsettled I’ don’t trust myself to make any major life decisions. Again thankful for your help with this!

Just following up on old threads. 2.4.5>45 was the path that healed my heart. The relationship never manifested into anything tangible but it opened me wide open in the best way. Line 4 in this case meant I had to trust where I was being lead was for the best. I didn’t and probably missed out on some opportunities but not all. Line 5, I’m thinking meant the rewards were of an internal nature. Spiritually speaking I’m a better person because of this relationship. The 45 was a gathering of me not within a group. In short I had to follow blindly, the rewards lead me back to myself which healed me. 15.2.3> 7 I’m not sure for this outcome.