Hey everyone

I have an issue with a neighbour, he lives behind us.
If you dont know I am currently in the Philippines.
The house I live in is probably the nicest in the compound.
This guy lives in a real dump.

I was walking off to the shops and he and his GF were walking by and he spat on the ground.
I kind of realised after passing him a few feet that it was deliberate.
I let my fiancee know, and she said she has been hearing some comments by his GF like making fun of her clothes.

The thing is he has been coughing out the front of the house like one of the times is was like 1 am.
He is doing this on and off..
The bottom line is they are racist and they are jealous. This is a part of living here, there is an element of racism here. Its everywhere in the world I guess,
Its kind of a weird thing as I wasnt sure if it was real or happening in my head.

So I asked what do I need to know about the coughing guy?
From the answer this appears to be a real thing.

I cant help think I am being advised to be aware.?

What do you think?

Steve

Have you looked at the 51uc thread ? There's a few of my examples there that show often this feels like a shock but it isn't anywhere but within you. I wrote of a lady who feared she had a heart condition and was called to the hospital and got this line. Result ? Her heart was fine. I have had the same experience a few times with 51uc and just recently about an illness that went by itself.

Always worth checking out the Image in an unchanging hexagram. From Hilary's book

'Rolling thunder : Shock
A noble Steve in fear and dread sets things in order and is watchful'

I think the experience generally makes one watchful. The lady with the heart, although she had nothing wrong became very aware of her diet etc. The thing I had recently made me aware of all the ways to treat it if it comes back etc.

I wonder if the Image here just describes how you are, you are very tuned in to signs of racism which is necessary, but it doesn't always mean it's there when you think it is.

Also the general advice in 51 is regardless of thunder rolling and crashing you never let the sacred ladle fall. You hold yourself intact.

Coughing outside someone's house doesn't seem a very usual way of expressing racism and a woman might mock another woman's clothes even if she were of the same race. For now, unless anything more concrete develops I think you should be less fearful

Its kind of a weird thing as I wasn't sure if it was real or happening in my head.

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Also the spitting thing...well it's common in the UK that some types of men just spit in the street to clear their throats. Not very nice but it generally is not directed to any people nearby. I think it's sort of seen as a bit macho amongst a certain type of person.

So he didn't spit at you, he spat at the ground and spitting at the ground is what some men just do.

Have you ever spoken to these people ? I ask because sometimes I find I have all sorts of ideas about people in the neighbourhood that are blown apart when I get to know them. Some people just have miserable or haughty faces but then when you talk to them they aren't like that at all.

Maybe you already know them a bit but if you don't I suggest if you see them often to start saying 'Hi' or make some small talk. I think small talk is invaluable for dispersing fear of strangers.

Of course if you already have evidence they are racist my suggestions will be a bit silly but my impression is that you aren't sure if they are. Another idea may be to talk to other neighbours in a casual way about what these people are like, that can help too.

There was a guy here who looked at me really funny and never responded much to friendliness. When I spoke to others in the neighbourhood I found out he had a learning difficulty and there was nothing personal about how he treated me. I'm glad I talked to other people because otherwise I could have had the idea he just didn't like me at all for years.

In short worry less Steve. Stay watchful and aware yes but don't panic, it may not be what you think it is.

Hi Trojina

Thanks so much for such a detailed response.

Yes I did read and do read the unchanging threads, I often visit them they are really helpful. When I first came to the forum I didn't understand unchanging Hexagrams , these days I am comfortable receiving them.

I think this guy is kind of showing off to his GF, to be honest I think he is quite poor so he is compensating this so he doesn't look bad in front of his GF.
Something like that anyway.

He does appear to be a little obsessed though but It appears you agree that I simply need to be aware of this or him.

The spitting was deliberate unfortunately , it is a custom here if people dont like someone.
It just a sign of disrespect.

I asked the Yi what should I do about the situation and funny enough received hexagram 50 unchanging. To be honest not sure what I am being told at this stage, other than the fact its one of my favourite hexagrams and is usually very fortunate for me.

Steve

A pot to put ingredients in to cook?

Yes I am not sure what this could mean?

Maybe a hint that you should be careful, that your fears and anxieties do not overboil?

I asked the Yi what should I do about the situation and funny enough received hexagram 50 unchanging. To be honest not sure what I am being told at this stage, other than the fact its one of my favourite hexagrams and is usually very fortunate for me.

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Yes funny because 50 comes before 51 ! What does this mean ? I don't know but the sequence does have relevance in readings, it's something Hilary is doing a lot of work on and has made a course on for CC members. It's still a process of discovery of course but the fact you got 51 then 50 must mean something.


If I had these readings I wouldn't do anything yet. Not because the casts are telling you to wait and see but well I think they are quite mysterious answers here, there is probably more going on around this whole thing than you are aware of. For one thing 50 shows a lot of different ingredients in a pot coming together to make something new, the result of the revolution in 49. If he did this to you maybe he did it to others near by in the community, and a community in the process of change is quite a 50ish thing and you aren't outside of it you are right there in it. You and your girlfriend are an ingredient so to speak, agents for change simply by being there.

Overall it's my impression that it's one of those situations that already connected to a bigger process. I don't think this is just about you and your girlfriend, as you say racism is everywhere but things can change and they may be changing even in your small part of it.

Personally I would hang fire OR really get the support of your community, find others this has happened to nearby, reach out to the neighbours you do trust.

Apart from that I can't say exactly why but I don't think you are required to take immediate action but I could be wrong. It's just I think if there were a specific remedial action to take I think you would have had some lines detailing what they are.

Also as Hilary has written with unchanging casts there is no relating hexagram obviously, so there is no particular subjective involvement or stance to take. It's outside of you.

Practically I guess as with all kinds of harassment, especially where you aren't sure, the first thing to do is log each incident on paper. That way if more serious events occur you have the background, with times and dates to back up any allegations.

...oh and also Yi aside you could simply approach him, look him in the eye and ask him about the incident ?

I asked the Yi what should I do about the situation and funny enough received hexagram 50 unchanging

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.

The other thing non Yi related is what exactly could you do ? If there was something to be done what would it be in the country you are in ?

Not having been subject to racism I don't know exactly what you would do. I think here, UK, you could report ongoing harassment to the police, certainly you could report actual assault of any kind.
Spitting, I don't know, if it happened more than once I guess it would count as harassment.

Also if it takes place in council properties the council will simply order people to leave the property. I have seen that happen quite recently. A man started shouting 'go back to your own country and threatening a Polish woman' and a police car took him away and he has not been allowed to live in that property again.

So what can you do about spitting and coughing outside your house ? What are the options ?

It is worth listing the options then asking Yi about each one.

For example

What if I ignore this ?

What if I confront the man and ask him what his problem is ?

What if I find out where he works and report him there ?

I don't know what other options might be available but it's worth considering what you can actually do about this. At the moment it doesn't look to me to be a lot but I'm no expert.

Hi

Thanks again to both of you, i did like Equinox's answer that could make sense. Thank you again Trogina for your detailed response, there was some very good advice. We havent heard from him in a while so maybe he has lost interest. If it continues I would get some cc tv I think. hexagram 50 i think is a kind of odd answer. Perhaps it will make sense in time. If anything happens I will be sure to update.

Steve

Maybe see 50. The Ting as meaning The Melting Pot and the I Ching as advising you to just have the attitude that it takes all kinds?

Incidentally, I have a friend who is gay and he has mentioned people coughing at him intentionally as a sign of disrespect.

Coughing as a sign of disrespect ? I never heard of that before. I mean what if you actually have a cough ? What if you are ill, what if you have a chest problem ? It would be a bit ludicrous if every time someone coughed it was a sign of disrespect or is this some American thing we don't do in UK ?

Also why would coughing be a sign of disrespect anyway ? What's it meant to signify ? That you cannot get air ?

In America it is considered rude to cough or yawn without covering your mouth so perhaps that's why it would be a sign of disrespect. Or maybe just because it's irritating? Anyway, just reporting that I've heard of this so I don't think Steve is being paranoid in interpreting the coughing as a deliberate act.

Interesting that 51 is probably the closest hexagram description of a cough!

I didn't say he was paranoid I said coughing was an unusual way to manifest racism. It's one I have never heard of before, not here anyway.

It's rather unfortunate if it is used as sign of disrespect since how the heck can anyone tell if a person is coughing because they have a cough or coughing because they are racist. There are lots of people coughing because it's winter and they have coughs and colds.

I'm sorry I misunderstood you. I apologize.

It is rather unfortunate if a cough is used as a sign of disrespect. I guess that's what makes it all the more annoying - the victim strongly suspects he's being targeted and yet there's juust enough doubt to make him uncertain about reacting. Maybe a solution would be to say, "God bless you"!

no need to apologise


Today I have been very conscious of being coughed at and coughing myself. I was in a shop and a woman coughed nearby and I wondered if she coughed because she wanted me to get out of the way or if she was just coughing.

I normally wouldn't think about why she was coughing.

Several times recently when people have had bad coughing fits in shops I have offered them a cough sweet. Sometimes I cough a lot when I have a tickle in my throat but it would never have occurred to me it might be seen as a sign of disrespect or prejudice. I don't think it is in the UK, hope it never will be.

Maybe Steve was talking about an obviously fake kind of coughing, although it isn't always easy to tell what's a fake cough.

Maybe a solution would be to say, "God bless you"!

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Or go over and pat them heartily on the back and offer them a cough sweet and insist they suck it.

Coughing and clearing the throat can be communication. I've seen it when someone is uncomfortable with another person. It can be considered human barking. (it says, "I'm uncomfortable right now.") The spitting is more agressive than the barking, it can be a cross between an insult and a threat.
So, the guy is probably jealous.

51: just keep calm. don't let it unbalance you.

While reading this thread hexagram 11.2 - hexagram 36. appeared in my thoughts. I looked it up and see that 11.2 is about walking in the midst of others and not being distracted and 36. Darkening of the Light is about keeping one's own light burning within. Seems like a clue to how one can navigate 51. Shock.

This idiot has been back a couple more times, he kind of made a threat like talking loudly so he can be over heard. Anyway I am aware of him so Hexagram 51 was spot on. Most of my experience with hexagram 51 are never very positive.
My fiancee has a big family and brothers in the Police, the Police here are not people you want to mess with. Hoping nothing escalates.

Steve

Just another update, my landlord is going to put the CC TV in so, that generally will put off most people. I hope thats the end of it

Steve