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Anger 63.5 > 36

heatwave

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What is the root/source of my anger? I’ve had a really good spring full of effectively implementing changes and routines I’ve been wanting to make progress on for a long time. I’m not normally a person who gets caught up in or responds with anger, but all week long I’ve been angry just under the surface for reasons I can’t explain. All of this is coinciding with an active effort to change my perspective inside in order to get in the right mindset to bring about new work opportunities. My friends and coworkers saying more or less innocuous things to me are making my mind mentally curse them out for some catharsis. I had to do the whole scream into the pillow thing last night to let some of it out. I feel like I’m only just holding it together and then something small at the job I don’t like happens and I feel like I’m going to lose it. I can’t believe I’m still here dealing with this same crap.63.5 seems to be about keeping things simple and being genuine. Is this line telling me that I’m over-complicating this? The story doesn’t resonate as a response to the source of anger. 36 makes some sense for me here though. I’m trying to maintain a certain exterior and deal with this internally and privately. Any idea what I’m missing here as it applies to my question? Thanks in advance.
 

Sixth Relative

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Hi heatwave

I would interpret 63zhi36 as the root of my anger:

What I believed to be an already completed change is only a stage requiring more effort (judgement). I may be thinking on new openings when it's not time for that but to consolidate the implemented change (line 5)

Best wishes
 
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Freedda

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Hi heatwave I would interpret 63zhi36 as the root of my anger:

What I believed to be an already completed change is only a stage requiring more effort (judgement). I may be thinking on new openings when it's not time for that but to consolidate the implemented change (line 5)
Sixth Relative, the above in italics appears to be a quote, so I'm wondering is it a quote for someone else's interpretation or translation, or are these your thoughts? And I assume the 'my anger' refers to heatwave's feelings, yes?

Best, D.
 
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becalm

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I agree with sixth relative and as I was reading your post I was thinking it sounds like you feel like it's a case of just when you think you've moved on....als recently i was becoming angry for no apparent reason and I realised I was eating a lot of foods that cause heat in your body.
 

Sixth Relative

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Freedda
That is what I would tell to myself if I asked about the root of my anger and got 63zhi36
 

heatwave

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What I believed to be an already completed change is only a stage requiring more effort (judgement). I may be thinking on new openings when it's not time for that but to consolidate the implemented change (line 5)
Thank you. I read this while at work yesterday and it honestly made me take a deep breath and relax. Progress has been made but there's still work to do. That's alright. I'll know it when something big shifts. Can you explain what you mean by "consolidate the implemented change"? I understand that to mean to stick with and refine the changes I've already made.
 

heatwave

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@becalm my laptop is not working right with the forum right now to edit my recent reply to @SixthRelative - I forgot to mention that it's interesting you mention diet since I have been on a strict elimination fast for the past 29 days (ends tomorrow and excludes things like coffee, dairy, sugar, etc.) and have felt more well-nourished and energetic than I have in awhile. But yes, I guess I have been feeling like okay, I've made a lot of progress so I must be moving on. That goes really well with was Sixth Relative said. I appreciate your input.
 
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becalm

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Sounds good heatwave though feelings of anger will also surface when detoxing. The Liver is the seat of Anger in our organs and Detoxing is done through the liver.
 

Sixth Relative

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Can you explain what you mean by "consolidate the implemented change"?

The text of the yang line in the fifth place of hex 63 compares the sacrifice of an Ox (eastern neighbor) with the spring offer (western neighbor). Many people in the West understand as if the difference lies in sincerity; but the Wings clarify that the difference is not about sincerity but about the right timing; to be precise, to act according with the times.

The eastern neighbor represents the deposed Shang dinasty and the western neighbor represents the new Zhou dinasty. To be attached to the old when it's time to complete the change is not a timely action. The old king has been deposed, but the old rites still live. Before undertaking new ventures, you need to consolidate the new rite. Otherwise, you risk to face the 'good begining confusing ending' omen.

So, you can think of it as assuring the new attitude becomes a solid habit, before moving to the next goal.
 
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Freedda

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Heavwave: Good question I think. I'm going to go a bit outside the box to start with, first looking at the trigrams.

So, here you have Fire below, which represents anger. In the meditative traditions anger is sometimes described as a piece of hot metal; we pick it up to point it at others, but we end up getting burned ourselves. You also have the trigram Water, above, which in this case could be that which is mysterious or hidden, so while you have anger, you don't really know why it's there or what caused it.

Looking then at the line:

63.5 - The eastern neighbor sacrifices cattle
Yet, this is not equal to the western neighbor’s
modest spring offering.
The genuine received their blessings.​

Well, hmmm. One possibility is that this line is describing envy. I can imagine the eastern neighbor saying, 'Damn the western neighbor. Here I've offered up my best steer, and what has he offered? A few measily rice grains! Yet everone's all hot and bothered by his offering!
So could your anger - at least in part - be about envy or jealousy?

If true or not, you likely want a way to deal with it (I assume that you don't just want to know its cause). And here you're given the pronouncement, 'the genuine received their blessings.

Genuine can also be sincere and authentic, and the blessings might also be happiness, enrichment, or abundance. So, to be authentic might be part of the key here. The line also suggest to me that your situation is workable - something that we dont always believe when we're working with difficult emotions.

Jumping back the hexagram, the fifth moving line creates a new trigram Earth (the upper trigram of 36). So perhaps the advice here is to be grounded, to perhaps 'touch' this anger, not with your reason, but as something you let yourself feel (though you don't need to act on). Where do you feel it in your body? What qualities does it have? tightness, density, numbness ...?

One quality of Fire/anger is that it wants to cling to something, for example, as in looking for someone or some thing to blame for the anger - perhaps like being upset with others whom have nothing to do with why your upset? So, this can be good to remember, and in this case - with Earth - you're trying instead to cling to the feeling and see if that opens up any possibilites or changes anything.

Anyways, I'm not sure if that's helpful at all, but make use of it if it is.


Best, David
 
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heatwave

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Surprise

I apologize for the late response. I actually did read everything but had a whirlwind of a week related directly to this reading. I wanted to make sure I came back to share. Upon reading the first responses, I knew they were right. That I felt disappointed in myself like the things I've been working on still have not happened or that I've got so much to improve. "What I believed to be an already completed change is only a stage requiring more effort." I also agree with becalm about where I was at with my 30 days of detoxing. But there was another layer that I would see just a couple of days later.

Freedda got to the heart of some of this."Water, above, which in this case could be that which is mysterious or hidden, so while you have anger, you don't really know why it's there or what caused it... Genuine can also be sincere and authentic, and the blessings might also be happiness, enrichment, or abundance. So, to be authentic might be part of the key here. "

I was angry at my friends because I sensed something was amiss. I couldn't articulate what it was. I just knew something was off and that I was angry at myself for being angry and hurt. It turns out, all of these people were involved in a very elaborate surprise for me. They were acting off and dismissing me to avoid being caught for months. In the days following this post I continued to try and deal with it but getting more and more upset. When the surprise moment came I was beside myself with gratitude and love but also shock and realization. I love this reading. It feels like everything is there. My anger about something mysterious. Wanting to work through that very real anger and finding lessons in how to do that. And also the mystery. And the blessings. I'll be thinking about this one for a long time.

(For some reason the forum has not been working correctly with my browser for a couple of months. I can't control quoting or formatting.)
 
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Freedda

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It turns out, all of these people were involved in a very elaborate surprise for me. They were acting off and dismissing me to avoid being caught for months .... When the surprise moment came I was beside myself with gratitude and love but also shock and realization.
Heatwave, thanks for getting back to us. Though I like to be 'right', it's much more important that I'm learning, and you getting back to us really helps with that. I'd say that I got it about half right: maybe close to the mark about what is mysterious and hidden, but not so much so with the part about envy being the root of your anger.

I re-read Sixth Relative's comment about line 63.5 being 'about the right timing,' which might have some relevance here (maybe?), as in the timing of your surprise and your friends needing to keep that from you until the 'time was right' to reveal it. But, hmm, that's maybe me stretching things a bit, ay?

D.
 

heatwave

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Yes, I agree that I personally wasn't experiencing envy but I can see how envy would be relevant in this reading in another situation. And no, I don't think it's a stretch about the right timing in line 5. I can actually see myself being directed here to not make a big show of my feelings during that time. (Wing: This is an inappropriate time for ostentatious exhibitions of personal success and grandeur.) It turns out everyone knew I was upset even though I kept my feelings to myself as best as I could and they all felt really guilty and grappled with that. Can you imagine if I had made a big show of my feelings and disappointment in their treatment of me? I honestly think that would have been enough for at least one person to break down and spoil the surprise.
 

Trojina

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I've not read the whole thread but this is a good reason why secret 'surprises' of the elaborate kind aren't very kind at all


I was angry at my friends because I sensed something was amiss. I couldn't articulate what it was. I just knew something was off and that I was angry at myself for being angry and hurt. It turns out, all of these people were involved in a very elaborate surprise for me. They were acting off and dismissing me to avoid being caught for months. In the days following this post I continued to try and deal with it but getting more and more upset. When the surprise moment came I was beside myself with gratitude and love but also shock and realization.

I've seen this kind of thing upset people before. I don't get why people do it because frankly the amount of suffering they caused you was only balanced out by the surprise.

It's not actually kind to plan things like this because it's really upsetting. I mean okay in the end you are happy but overall I think these kind of surprises are more like shocks especially if one feels insecure to start with.

I remember a similar thing with a boyfriend where he wouldn't see me in the evenings and wouldn't say why and of course I got upset and angry and then it turned out he'd been spending the time carving me something as a gift. But frankly I'd rather not have the gift and not have the pain of the confusion and worry to start with !


If people plan surprises they ought to think of how their odd behaviour affects you, it can hurt a lot.
 

moksha_

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Just my take - hexagram 63 is an image of water over fire. I think the fire represents your anger. The 5th place is masculine, with a yang line. It's situated where the water is. You are holding onto the water, and yang stubbornly holds on to things. I think the water represents how you deal with putting out the fire. When your friends or coworkers say those innocuous things, you shouldn't hold back and curse them out in your head, it might be unhealthy for you. You should find a way to let it easily flow, and find a healthy way to adapt to what they're saying at that very instance, instead of stubbornly holding on to it so that it doesn't pop up later and you release it like a dam overflowing - and also so that the fire doesn't go out of control from dealing with it later.

edit - Sorry, didn't read the whole thread. Still, might be a good idea to deal with your anger somehow so that it doesn't happen again.
 

heatwave

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I do not disagree, but ultimately I'm still grateful for their good intentions and that it was a great week. Lucky for my friends and family I am hardly a party planner, so they won't likely have the gesture returned.Thanks, moksha. I do agree that it is still a good idea to learn from the situation about my anger. That is what the question was about in the first place and really pretty difficult for me. I appreciate your input.
 

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