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QUestion: Why am I so unhappy and lacking in enthusiasm? 37.2.5.6 to 11

butterflydog

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I have a started a new career and have been working at it for about 9 months. I have been a stay-at home mom for most of my life with smaller part-time jobs. Now I have a real estate license and I am working on a team as an admin and agent. I go to the office every day. I like most of the people I work with but I am not aligned with the way my manager wants me to do the business. I am working as an assistant to his wife---I am on call for her and also expected to follow-up leads, nurture my own business and go to meetings and do open houses on Sundays. I feel like a plant that is not getting enough sun. But I don't know what to do. I have had bouts of depression and I feel like this job is contributing to it. It is not without the lighter side but most of the time I feel trapped and just want to leave the office and be free. The I think this is childish and I should have more discipline than that and be an adult and be in the real world. I am 60 years old but this job makes me feel like I am 12. It is sapping my confidence and making me feel worthless. I would appreciate any perspective on what the I Ching is trying to tell me. This is the first time I am using this forum. Thank you.
 
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diamanda

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Hi butterflydog,

Why am I so unhappy and lacking in enthusiasm? 37.2.5.6 > 11


37.2 is probably about you in the past, being a stay-at-home mum. 37.5 is about a 'king' pillaging a family (this is my own take on this line, based on my own lengthy experience with it). And 37.6 shows an aggressive woman. Because it's the last line, it also shows the end of family, or the end of the influence of womanhood.

So this job is the source of your unhappiness, or rather, the cause is that your bosses are greedy and belligerent. In addition, this being the end of 'family', perhaps it also has to do with hormonal changes in you.

I know this type of people who make you feel small, sap your confidence, and make you feel worthless. In modern terminology they are called NPDs. Please take immediate action (i.e. either build strength and boundaries, or get away) as such influences can actually destroy someone's health. Because this is resulting in 11, I believe that you can find a way (psychologically speaking) to remain in that job.
 

butterflydog

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Thank you Diamanda. The end of the influence of womanhood is an interesting way to put it. I was able to speak my truth about some boundaries yesterday and my boss did a pivot and suggested that the part of the job that wasn't resonating with me be changed. I was keeping in mind what you said about flow --so I am using that as a mantra. Stay in the flow. And be like a dancer and light---rather than getting stuck in doubt, insecurity and negativity.
 
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diamanda

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I didn't say anything about flow or staying in the flow.
Glad to hear that you started setting boundaries and it worked!
 

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