Clarity,
Office 17622,
PO Box 6945,
London.
W1A 6US
United Kingdom
Phone/ Voicemail:
+44 (0)20 3287 3053 (UK)
+1 (561) 459-4758 (US).
If you do this, the best possible outcome will be that you will be departing from old habits and that this will be showing everyone that change is possible, and once it starts change spreads like wildfire. You will be setting a scene which will be easier for the relationship to follow.So then, if i do this, am receptive and do not openly flirt, what is the best possible outcome? 43.2 and 49
Show me a picture of him now: 48.4 (and forgot the last hex, but i believe it was Preponderance of the Great).
How can I best help him: 2.4 and 16. I take this to mean keep a low profile but be enthusiastic if he phones me. If you see it differently, please share.
Can I hope for Romance with him? 49.2 and 17
Should I address him only as a friend? 55.1 and 62.
If I flirt with him? Hex 17.2.4 and hex 60 Limitation.
So then, if i do this, am receptive and do not openly flirt, what is the best possible outcome? 43.2 and 49
I am curious what this 43.2>49 means. Especially 49. Is the molting revolution a change *within* our dynamic to something better, or signifying a breakage of whatever we have now, to a departure of ways??
Line: 2: A cry of alarm. Arms at evening and at night. Fear nothing.
The Superior Man is always on his guard and so, when there is an alarm, he does not become excited and flustered. When reason triumphs over fear, he treats difficulties as though they did not exist. As he develops his strength of character, so others submit to him without argument.
That phrase "when reason triumphs over fear" certainly would be nice, but can it be taken literally ??
And hex 49. Ko / Revolution (Molting)
Revolution. On your own day You are believed. Supreme success. Furthering through perseverance. Remorse disappears. The Image Fire in the lake: the image of Revolution. Thus the superior man Sets the calendar in order.
And what does the "Calendar" mean here?
Hes taking time to heal...he needs a bit of space he can't function well right now. obviously this ties in with what you said about him being ill and his anxiety.
Theres not alot you can do to help him. Whats happening with him is a process hidden to your view..that seems to tie in with 48.4 also as it would seem hes going through some inner 'stuff' right now. When alot is happening on the inside its hard to be fully present in relationships. Anyway don't worry about how tohelp him, his process is out of your hands...all you can do is just be there, let him know your're there if he needs you for anything.
LOL oh no you're on a roll tonight
seriously though from what your're saying i reckon there may be so much inner stuff happening with him he just can't focus too much on making things work with you at the moment....and maybe your best bet is really just to be there for him if you care about him(hex 2). it does sound like hes having a tough time and thoughts of romance aside (and romance often isn't very loving cos we are thinking of what we want all the time...not saying you are but...and heck romance would be very diffcult when one is having anxiety attacks which are really horrible things to have) you can be there as a caring friend ...
anyway on to the questions...49.2 well it would look like a timely change in the basis of your relationship is on the cards...though i am a usual very hesitant to say this means you will have a romance...as Nicky P said the other day I'm not sure Yi sees romance the way we modern westerners do..
55.1 we have been discussing 55.1 alot in a thread by Ginnie further down the list. It can show a window of opportunity, a special time in a relationship that doesn't last forever but is certainly something to make use of. I'm not sure your question has been answered directly. My take is that you would do well to certainly be a friend to him, that your connection in some sense has a fatedness about it. Whether or not this goes where you want it to it is good to engage with this person. It doesn't say if you should only engage with him as a friend...its just saying you should engage with him. Maybe this rigid distinction between friend and lover is less useful than you think. Just being withhim however you can be seems good.
17.2.4 >60 If you flirt with him ? Mm no I think this advises you not to be too calculating or unnatural. 17.4 is about being somewhat false to gains ones own ends so you don't really want to go down that path and 17.2 shows that path to be the more immature one...besides flirting may actually limit your bond at this stage (hex 60) also if hes freakingout generally he may not be comfortable with full on flirting so maybe just playing it as you have been, receptive but demure is less demanding
i think the calender means one is aware of the natural timing of things, being aware of the seasons in things. You can't make things happen before they are ready to happen just like we can't have snow in summer. You want a big change in the realtionship, 49.2 seemed positive for that..but theres a right time for it to happen
Anyway 43.2 best possible outcome ? Hmm I'm stumped there..i never get 43.2 and don't have much of a feel for it at all. 43 is about stating oyur truth...43.2 talks about dangers inherant in that presumably and being prepared..but i can't see how that relates to your question. Hopefully someone else has thooughts on that....you see i get brain fatigue after answering more than 2 questions but i will give it some thought
overall i think its good you call him, just to be friendly. my feeling is you should let this relationship run on...the 43.2 may refer to your feelings of panic about getting the relationship you want with him.. You do seem to have a sense of urgency, like you need to know if he is going to be a boyfriend or just a friend
This stumps me too. Best possible outcome: state your truth & be prepared for danger?
By the way, Trojan, I found this about 43.2 'best possible outcome if i do X":
# Be anxious, worried, upset.
# Take pity on; sympathize with.
# Have mercy on; show kindness to.
# Enliven, make prosperous.
ANd 49 meaning: to unmask, no facade; "It's about transformation, and being aware of the right time to shed the old ways and begin anew. It's about shedding old skins, masks, beliefs or encrusted ways of thought. And about the inevitability of change... when it's the right season for it. The thing about revolutions, though, is that actually there aren't any liberators and there's no one to be liberated." Maybe this means I can either improve the situatio ("enliven make prosperous") or be anxious about it, and in the end the best possible outcome will be some shift from where i am now?
But where I am now *is already* anxious and worried.
He phoned last night and in the course of the call mentioned a second time that a former student of his (who happens to be from Czech rep and i found her photo online, v beautiful but younger than i am) will be stayhing with him for 1 1/2 mos from mid-May onwards. He had told me this before we really had our first "date" and said i should meet her. But now i am worried he's interested in her, however irrational that worry may be. He also in passing said i shoudl tell my SISTER that she could stay in that same extra room come July.
He knows that as of late August I will be looking for not only a place to stay but a job (I'm going away for a few months and returning then). But there was no mention or offer of ME staying there. And that hurts like hell bc I presume it is a very clear sign of rejection...
What message was he trying to send me on the phone last night? 58.4 and 54.
That line: Joyousness that is weighed is not at peace. After ridding himself of mistakes a man has joy.
Is it telling me i should be happy for some reason? Why am i not? Were these just innocent comments? What am i not seeing?
Is there anything positive here at all??
Hi Mike, ( my key)
See beyond the facade of old masks... you mean other people's masks? In this case, his old mask? (or the current one i'm trying to peel off?)
IF that's the case -- it doesnt seem to be off all the way bc i cannot *see* what is underneath. It could go either way. Maybe he's taking time, doing the rubberband, building up a wall, regenerating (48.4 building the lining of his well back up). Or maybe *this* is the new status quo. I do not know. Is there something you see that i do not? Is there something I'm not asking, that i should?
There is the possibilty that if he were very attracted to you he may find it impossible to share a flat with you. Thats me not the Yi BTW
58.4 is about weighing up pros and cons, choosing best options. I'm wonderingif he was either testing you outin the phone call or asking you for advice about this girl staying, maybe hes not sure about it. 58.4 says hes not sure about something.
Hanging on to see what he wants must be nerve wracking and i do appreciate you can't raise your hopes and go on hanging on forever...but right now you don't seem to have much choice so i guess you have tofind a way to get some peace with this.
One thing about 49.2 it does say 'he makes changes..' i don't think 49.2 just waits for things to change. I wonder what would happen if you were completely open with him about your feelings ? I guess you'd know one way or the other at least
On the plus side he did ring last night don't let your fear of rejection get in your way...I know sometimes we can be so eager not to be the rejected one we do the rejecting first when the other actually wasn't intending to reject us in the first place....the joys of being human lol
HiI will be honest. The last two answers seem to contradict the first. No?
OK so 49.2 was the question "can i hope for romance with him." You say it means he makes changes. He DID change. He put out all these flirtatious messages and pulled back. He sent a cryptic email Monday (which hastn been referenced since) where he said "forgive me for initiating suggestive and flirtatious things and then retreating, giving you conflicting and confusing messages. That was very unfair to you. And unintended, as I know you know." With a smiley face. Followed by no more emails, but a nightly "friendly" phonecall. Today is my birthday and Sunday is Valentines day. We have no future plans to see each other. I 'm not taking phonecalls as lack of rejection at this point. I'm taking them as him "letting me down easy." I read that message (just mentioned) INITIALLY to mean he didnt mean to confuse me, he IS interested. His behavior this week, health issues aside, seems to contradict that. How far and how much do i bend or forgive? I dont know.
...
First is his hesitation about intimacy based, according to him, on health issues.
The real situation between the two of you is one of "Stripping Away" - Things are dissolving around you enabling you to see behind the mask. What's going on isn't what you think it is and slowly you will realise this and when you realise you will start to feel more at peace.What is the real situation between him and me? hex 23. Twice. Unchanging.
Clarity,
Office 17622,
PO Box 6945,
London.
W1A 6US
United Kingdom
Phone/ Voicemail:
+44 (0)20 3287 3053 (UK)
+1 (561) 459-4758 (US).