H38.3.4 > H26 - What to do?

[anna_volke]

Hello IC Community,

Here there is another question regarding a difficult situation with a former mentor, who suddenly became totally unaccessible (actually deluded) do to some personal involvement with a freshman female student. This created a lot of problems for me and for the project, and I still wonder if there is anything else left for me to do at this point. I asked the IC and received H38.3.4 > H26.

I take it that H38 refers to 2 women and 1 man, though I am certainly passed that kind of struggle. I feel that if there is anyone who should mend the situation, it should the "screwed mentor", and not me. Any suggestion welcome!

Best wishes,
AV
:bows:

 

[gene]

Hello AV

I am not sure what your real question is. Is the mentor someone being paid by you? Or is it someone you have a romantic interest in?

Also, I do not understand why you think hexagram 38 refers to 2 women and one man. It certainly can, but it doesn't have to. What is the real need here? Just to get him back to mentoring you or is there a bigger question?

But...the commentary on line three says, "... as though everything were conspiring against him. So the first thing you need to do is check to see that you are seeing things the way they really are. It also says, "Must cling to the person to whom he really belongs. Thus notwithstanding...the matter will end well." Hexagram twenty six indicates that you must take an innocent attitude toward this, or such that you do not try to interfere, but allow things to happen, and yet at the same time, "cling to the mentor" in ways that you can.

Line four speaks of someone with whom you are fundamentally akin to and can help you overcome isolation. I think that if you just do what you need to do, without trying to force the issue, but still acting in appropriate ways to the situation, that the matter will eventually resolve itself.

Gene

 

[anna_volke]

Gene, thank you so much for this feedback. This is indeed quite insightful!!

The mentor used to be my boss, but due to this messed up situation with the freshman student I left the project. However, I still feel that I might have missed *THE* opportunity.

The connection is not really romantic, though things might have become a bit blurred at some point. I would like to have his support, and possibly I would like to be back in the project, but there is still this issue with the freshman student which I don't know how to handle, and its also not clear that they want me back in the project anyway.

One question: the person in line 4 is this "mentor", or is it someone else? Also, how do you suggest to cling to this person?

Sorry to bother with so many questions, and thank you for this great help. You have no idea how much this is appreciated.

With thanks and best wishes

Many Blessings,
AV

 

[gene]

Hi AV

As far as the lines refer to, I cannot say with any certainty. I will say this, that it strikes me this way, that the third line is you and the fourth him. The thing that strikes me is that there is only two lines changing, one yin and one yang. This would hint to me that the third person, the freshman is of no or at least little consequence. The fact that the two changing lines are right in the middle of the hexagram indicates to me that one male and one female are related to each other, but do not necessarily have a romantic relationship. However, one yin and one yang indicates they could. They do not correspond, but they are "neighbors" having at least "some" kind of relationship.

The commentary on the third line would indicate that perhaps you do not see this the way it really is and that a "change of attitude" could help clear up the misunderstanding. Hexagram thirty eight itself is about misunderstanding. The clinging to him would indicate the need to continue with the project if at all possible. The commentary on the fourth line speaks of becoming free of faults, which here I interpret as free of the misunderstanding that is causing the isolation. In further passing of time it might become more clear that one is actually working with a "like minded man." In other words, you can work together more than you think. The fact that there is no third changing lines hints to me that perhaps the "freshman" is a temporary thing. The third line "meets someone who is firm." This someone who is firm is the fourth line, who it appears would be him. So maybe there needs to be some kind of meeting of the minds.

I just thought of something else. The firm person may not be the person in the fourth line, not him, but the person in the sixth line with whom the third line corresponds. This would be someone higher in rank than him, and this person can resolve the misunderstanding. I don't recommend that kind of thing though unless it is really necessary. People can get seriously hurt. In book three of the Wilhelm/Baynes version the commentary on line three says, "The fact that the good end is attained is due to the relations with the strong line at the top, which resolves the misunderstanding. Hopefully, this will all make sense to you, and will give you some ideas of how to deal with this. The fourth line though says, "Both have the will to overcome the misunderstandings, so it is also possible you can go to him directly without going above his head.

When I do readings online, I am very cautious, because I feel like I have a charge to be "right," so as to not hurt anyone. But only be helpful, so I don't say too much. I only try to get to the heart of things where I feel the most sure. Also, I am careful to be short so that people will not get bored reading it. So here is the expanded version. I hope it helps and makes sense.

Gene

 

[anna_volke]

Dear Gene,

This interpretation is quite impressive, how do you do this ??? !!!>>> I can totally relate to the things you suggested. It is a good advice to review my preconceptions towards the situation ... and I definitely know who the person above him is. I understand that contacting this person above (6th line) should be a kind of "last resource" approach. You're absolutely right, and it makes sense, thank you for suggesting this.


I agree that a "meeting of minds" should happen, but I don't see any viable way of making this happen, as we are not even in contact at the moment. And I feel that trying to push this meeting might make things even worse, or could put me in a weaker position. I don't mean to take so much of your time but, I asked again the IC how can I make this "meeting of minds" happen, and I received: H58.6 > H10.


Hexagram 58 line 6 says: "When the minimal happiness has come so deep into us, one loses the chance to own one’s life. It will depend on the possibility and the external circumstances."
I am not sure if the minimal happiness refers to the mentor or to me, but I guess this meeting will rather depend on external factors (?) Further more, H10 says that from a distance they seem unconquerable but working hard but quietly it is possible to be in control and keep an important position for a long period of time. This would suggest that working hard and keeping a long term position is the solution. Though I am not sure which position this is referring to as it does not seem plausible to be a position within the project (?).

Anyway, sorry to take so much time, and thank you for the insights and for the "safety button" suggestion, this is most valuable, and needless to say, thank you for being so very careful in your message, this is very thoughtful and clever, and it is most appreciated. You sound quite professional in your readings. Hopefully one day I will get to that level of understanding, you've really got it!!!


With thanks and warm wishes,

Many blessings,
AV

 

[gene]

Hi AV

I would be careful about asking too many questions on one topic. It can lead to confusion. But anyway. In hexagram 58 line 6 the danger is in being seduced in some way. Or perhaps being taken advantage of. I don't think it is directly answering your question here, at least not from what I see at this point, but rather warning you of a potential danger in this situation. You will have to be firm and really look at the situation for what it is and not what someone is telling you it is. I do not know what to say more than that now.

Gene

 

[anna_volke]

Thank you Gene, this is very helpful. It seems quite easy for beginners to misinterpret Hexagrams!!!
Best wishes and many blessings,
AV

 

[gene]

Hi Anna

Therein lies the danger of using the I Ching. Readings are almost always misinterpreted even by the best of readers, especially in the west where we do not have the depth of understanding that the ancient Chinese had. That is why I am so cautious and only offer readings here when I am quite sure of the answer. I do not read professionally, but like to give of my time and services here for free as I have spent too much of my life thinking only of myself. Maybe someday I will do professional readings but right now no one knows me, other than here online.

One key is to develop ourselves spiritually. Without a spiritual understanding of the world we cannot possibly know the true meanings of the lines and hexagrams, and apply them to ourselves. It is also hard to read for ourselves as we are normally not objective enough.

But anyway, I am glad that the readings were helpful. And I wish you well in this situation and in all situations. I am sure I will see your name more on this site, and be glad to help in the future as well.

Gene