Help with reading

[lysithea]

Hey guys, I am new into this community and also to the IChing readings. I need help to understand a reading
My question was: What is the current status of my relationship with XXX? (it's a romantic relationship that has had up and downs and is currently in a "down" bit, according to me)
I got 33.4 changing to 53. Not a very good omen it seems, but the "marriage of a young lady" part makes me wonder wether or not the "retiring" mantioned in line 4 might be a good thing and could lead to a betterment of the relationship in the long run (considering my question was about the current status of the relationship)

 

[lysithea]

I then asked what the future held for our relationship and I got Hex 14, so I am really confused

 

[peter2610]

What is the current status of my relationship with XXX

Hi Lysithea,

Firstly, as you are new to the I Ching let me congratulate you on the 'general' approach of your question. This is, in my opinion, the right way to approach divination, give the I Ching space to fill in the details.
Hex33 is about withdrawal from a negative influence or situation. The yang lines in the upper part of the hexagram withdraw from the two yin lines at the bottom. The text for line 4 - 'Voluntary retreat brings good fortune to the superior man and downfall to the inferior man.' Fourth yang is, of its own choice, withdrawing from the 'inferior man' at first yin. Wang Bi gives added detail - 'the noble man (woman) withdraws from that of which he is fond...the petty man is obstructed.' This reflects the emotional attachment in your situation but, unfortunately, the message is the same - you are urged to withdraw. The Zhi Gua Hex53, Gradual Progress, indicates using time to bring order and correctness back into your situation. It means abiding in rectitude and progressing until the correct conditions prevail, only then is the maiden given in marriage. I would suggest that this probably indicates an eventual relationship with a different partner, on a far more correct basis, but it could also mean a renewal with X on a better understanding.
Your second question, about your future relationship with X, gave Hex14, Great Possession. On the face of it this could look promising for a renewal with X, but it could also reflect a situation where you remain as just friends. Fifth yin, the ruling line - 'He whose truth is accessible, yet dignified, has good fortune ... The good fortune of his dignity comes from the fact that he acts easily, without prearrangements,' - could very well describe a friendship in which your boundaries (your dignity) are well established but within which you relate freely and openly.

Hope this helps.

Peter

 

[lysithea]

thanks

Thanks Peter. Even though i'm just starting getting into the IChing world, I had experience in tarot and rune readings in the past, so i guess that's the reason why I give room for the oracle to express itself.
Funny story. After that, my significant other and I had a little conversation today where I had to establish boundaries (firmness and correctness anyone?) One of the main issues I have with this relationship is that I have trouble being firm and steady in my decisions and i oftenly let people get away with things, even though I feel they are not the right thing to do. I've been trying to change that.
Anyways, in light of this new development, I asked the oracle another question:
"How is my relationship with XXX going to be afected by the boundaries I set today". I got 19.1.3 with related hex 46. My interpretation of that is that there will be progress and the boundaries are well received, though I have to be careful and not become passive and let myself get carried away, choose the easy road or become too comfortable, instead, I have to stick to what I said and show consistency. The 8th month bit confuses me a little bit, I think it's about proper timing, but I don't know what to make of it.
As for the related Hexagram (46), it makes me think of the journey and the importance of it in the final outcome. I see it as positive, though I feel the advice is mainly related to taking one step at the time, without hurrying to much but without getting to slow either. Dont know. Thoughts anyone?
thanks

dani

 

[ace]

33.4>53.

Sounds like it exactly describes your situation. The relationship (53: still intact, still developing) is on a low point or there is not as much activity in the relationship as you are used to or like (33).

line 4 maybe pointing out that when someone feels secure in the relationship this withdrawal is not a problem and could actually be a benefit, as perhaps, the individuals could work on themselves, their interests, their lives, and bring this new fullness back to the relationship. Thus, this withdrawal could actually be a benefit to the development of the relationship. However, if one is not secure in the relationship, this withdrawal would/could be an uncomfortable place.

 

[knotxx]

I think ace is exactly right. 33 in my experience describes a temporary or strategic retreat, and that particular line is often translated (by heylise, for example) as "loving retreat" -- a kind of loving stepping back to give the situation a little space and air, but in the context of 53, which is a gradual coming toward a new home.

I sometimes translate hexagram 14 in my mind as "your great treasure." For what it's worth, I often get this hexagram when I ask "what do I need to know about [my husband]." I seem to get it particularly when I am NOT seeing him as my great treasure, if you know what I mean, and it always feels like a chastening shock, sometimes one that makes me cry, to get that lovely reminder that he is.

 

[lysithea]

I know what you mean knot, it is a lovely reminder and sort of a "don't give up, it's worth it" message.
I'm still not sure about wether or not my interpretation of the third question (about the consequences of my new set of boundaries with the answer 19.1.3 w/related 46) is right or not. I would very much apreciate some insight

 

[knotxx]

I thought your reading of 19-46 was dead on, actually.

 

[lysithea]

yayyyy me! thanks a lot you guys. Now it's time to put the oracle advice into action. You are all very kind.
take care and hope i'll be seeing you around, hopefully i'll be able to help too from time to time