Clarity,
Office 17622,
PO Box 6945,
London.
W1A 6US
United Kingdom
Phone/ Voicemail:
+44 (0)20 3287 3053 (UK)
+1 (561) 459-4758 (US).
Hey guys,
Tonight, I asked the Iching "What is happening between X and I? "
And the Iching gave me 33 with the first line changing to 13.
My thoughts are consumed by these relationship and I have gone into retirement since saturday. So it is very correct. We haven't spoken in several days. Things are very dark in the relationship. It is an addictive love. Intoxicating. It is not a mutual relationship. Power struggles. Unhealthy. She tends to abuse the power. In fact, recently, there is no love or intimacy. I tend to attract BPDer's because I am a fix/rescuer type and I am easy prey. She pushes me away. However, i tend to see through this and see her pain which is rooted in childhood. Anyway, i know this is the right thing to do..go into retirement... in fact it is the only thing to do. Yet, It does not feel right to say that I am abandoning this person. It also doesn't feel right to say I am quitting this person cold turkey. Or running away. I feel my ego is getting in the way. . . I am also very aware where that my own wounded ego needs come from childhood and what I did not get from my parents. And this person triggers this in me. And I repeat the patterns trying to gain the love/approval...
Anyway, please tell me what you think.
Tonight, I asked the Iching "What is happening between X and I? "
And the Iching gave me 33 with the first line changing to 13.
My thoughts are consumed by these relationship and I have gone into retirement since saturday. So it is very correct. We haven't spoken in several days. Things are very dark in the relationship. It is an addictive love. Intoxicating. It is not a mutual relationship. Power struggles. Unhealthy. She tends to abuse the power. In fact, recently, there is no love or intimacy. I tend to attract BPDer's because I am a fix/rescuer type and I am easy prey. She pushes me away. However, i tend to see through this and see her pain which is rooted in childhood. Anyway, i know this is the right thing to do..go into retirement... in fact it is the only thing to do. Yet, It does not feel right to say that I am abandoning this person. It also doesn't feel right to say I am quitting this person cold turkey. Or running away. I feel my ego is getting in the way. . . I am also very aware where that my own wounded ego needs come from childhood and what I did not get from my parents. And this person triggers this in me. And I repeat the patterns trying to gain the love/approval...
Anyway, please tell me what you think.
Last edited: