kindred soul? 59.3.6>5

[johansen]

Hi everyone!
I have been dating an interesting woman for some months now.Not a piece of cake i would say, for both of us i suppose, as we are both trying not to get hurt, very cautious , maybe too cautious actually.We've taken our time recently , she needed to sort things out, we sort of cooled down to see what comes ahead.
I recently asked the oracle : What role am i currently playing for her?
The answer was 8.6>20 It talks about hesitation not being beneficial, but i'm not sure if it says it is over , or just a warning.

I also asked :Are we meant to be together? and got 59.3.6>5 This hexagram is a ggod sign on the whole, i think but line 6 just knocks me off.

Can you halp me read these answers properly?

 

[johansen]

Just to share my clue: l3 says that we need to abolish the separating wall , it;s not going to be easy, we must make an effort. L 6 describes what she did, her motives concerning the recent detachment, i mean it seems she wanted to prevent more arguments or hard times in general. Hex 5 says : wait and it will come.
Does it make sense ?

 

[em ching]

Hi,

I'd say, well instant reaction to simplify things, that 59.3, 6 - 5 says that for the time being perhaps you should give her space, have time apart and seperate (as the literal translation of dispersal) but hex 8 - 20 suggests that there is a potentially supportive union that she is considering. But perhaps you just need to allow her to take the lead, not force things, but at the same time let her know you are thinking about her and care. Just don't push for signs of emotional involvement and commitment perhaps. Wait for that.

 

[willowfox]

"Are we meant to be together?" and got 59.3.6>5

This looks very good and speaks of later success as there are various problems that need to be overcome before a more formal commitment will be made.

"What role am i currently playing for her? 8.6>20

She obviously can't make up her mind what she does want here, perhaps it is you that needs to provide her with the answer as to what to do.

 

[Trojina]

Hi everyone!
I have been dating an interesting woman for some months now.Not a piece of cake i would say, for both of us i suppose, as we are both trying not to get hurt, very cautious , maybe too cautious actually.We've taken our time recently , she needed to sort things out, we sort of cooled down to see what comes ahead.
I recently asked the oracle : What role am i currently playing for her?
The answer was 8.6>20 It talks about hesitation not being beneficial, but i'm not sure if it says it is over , or just a warning.

I also asked :Are we meant to be together? and got 59.3.6>5 This hexagram is a ggod sign on the whole, i think but line 6 just knocks me off.

Can you halp me read these answers properly?

Frankly I'd see this as you both waiting (5) for things to dissolve futher. 59.6 suggests distance is a really good idea. 8.6 suggests difficulty, lack of motivation to hold it together. 59 is about dispersion, letting go, dissolving. Some people mistakenly think its about reuniting. I think its only about reuniting as in the sense that one becomes bigger than the issue between you...like friends splitting up but through needing space and freedom, drifting apart rather than parting through bad feeling. Bad feeling is dissolved because it no longer matters anyway, the ego loses involvement with it. In your reading 59.3 suggests to me lessening ego involvement with the whole thing. Maybe you'll find this easier to let go and disperse than you imagine.

Perhaps the dissolving is a temporary thing, I don't know but right now it looks like space between you is desirable. I don't think with these answers I'd hang on hopefully anyway.

 

[my_key]

Hi Johansen

There are some good responses already in this thread for you. I hope this interpretation will add to the picture you are building.

What role am i currently playing for her?
The answer was 8.6>20

8 = per wilhelm :Union requires greatness of spirit, consistency, and strength. Therefore let him who wishes to gather others about him ask himself whether he is equal to the undertaking, for anyone attempting the task without a real calling for it only makes confusion worse than if no union at all had taken place.
If a man has recognized the necessity for union and does not feel strong
enough to function as the center, it is his duty to become a member of some
other organic fellowship.
The role you are playing for her is a player in her confusion of what relationships truly are. Are you really up to the challenges of this role or want to be this player?

8.6 -Wilhelm -If the beginning is not right, there is no hope of a
right ending. If we have missed the right moment for union and go on
hesitating to give complete and full devotion, we shall regret the error when
it is too late.
Begin as you mean to go on. By being false to yourself at the start you'll set the relationship and what you need from it off on the wrong foot.

20 - By looking deep inside you'll see the right thing to do for you .

I

also asked :Are we meant to be together? and got 59.3.6>5

( Your question begs a Yes or no answer - you might want think on the re - wording of the question for more clarity)

59 - Dissolution - This is about the egos of both of you needing to be gently dissolved. Immerse yourself in the situation and allow the wounds to heal.

59.3 - You don't always put yourself first. Sometimes you have to experience what this means in life before you can truly understand it. What is happening now is a great opportunity to recognise something important about yourself. Don't fret yourself about what is happening.

59.6 - Leaving behind some of your old behaviours may be a good way of preventing future hurts.

5 - Waiting is a key part of the process. Keep on with what you are doing here questioning and looking inwards and your understandings will come.

Take Care

Mike

 

[johansen]

Hi, and thank you all for such great deal of hints, though contradictory at times, as to what direction to give to my thoughts and how to relate them to my inner voice i would like to hear a bit louder

Trojan, you've got me wondering here with this idea of yours : < 59 is about dispersion, letting go, dissolving. Some people mistakenly think its about reuniting> , as i can clearly read in my I Ching volume - which is a reliable translation of R.Wilhelm - that the subject of this hex (59) is the dispersion of the egoism that separates.Dispersion,it says, indicates the way , the means,that lead to the union.And in this aspect both hex 45 and 59 are similar.It talks about what is necessary to overcome the ego that separates people,so that they can reunite , namely through spiritual forces ,which makes people leave their state of letargy. (The King enters his temple). Am i wrong?

Anyway,good point Mike, and thank you for showing me a broader aspect, the lesson the whole situation might be meant to teach me : to play the second best , so to speak, and i appreciate it the more now as i was thinking of it the whole morning.
And you are right:rephrasing the yes/no question should probably make me feel more confident about the answer.
I asked : What can i expect from this relation in the near future?

The answer i got is 26.3>41
I understand the blockages will give way,there is a g0od horse following the other, but the need to be cautious will persist, which i interprete as the necessity of modeartion (or is there sth worse in it i can't see?) and above all there's the need to have a goal . This i see as sth overlaping Mike's take of 8.6, which i inetrpreted as : begin in such a way that you may reach a desirable end (establish a goal and adjust the means).
Hex 41, as the relating one takes me to a crossroads.It may talk of the current scarcity that ,given the inner truth that it highlights ,will prove beneficial and enriching ( <One who effects decrease with sincerity will bring about great good fortune without blame.>), it praises simplicity and inner strenghth to compensate the external lack .The other interpretation is more direct , it may say bluntly that the relationship itself, when/if resumed, will be more restrained.

Personally i prefer to think the first will prevali , but this is may be too subjective.

Any comments that put me on the right track if this what i get is all wrong?

Thank you.

 

[Trojina]

Trojan, you've got me wondering here with this idea of yours : < 59 is about dispersion, letting go, dissolving. Some people mistakenly think its about reuniting> , as i can clearly read in my I Ching volume - which is a reliable translation of R.Wilhelm - that the subject of this hex (59) is the dispersion of the egoism that separates.Dispersion,it says, indicates the way , the means,that lead to the union.And in this aspect both hex 45 and 59 are similar.It talks about what is necessary to overcome the ego that separates people,so that they can reunite , namely through spiritual forces ,which makes people leave their state of letargy. (The King enters his temple). Am i wrong?


.

All I was saying is that the reuniting in 59, the way I see it, is rarely on the level that the asker actually wants it, ie to be close to partner again. From my own experience I find 59 to be very much around disengaging, letting difficult relationship dissipate...but in that sense there is a reuniting as in there are no hard feeling or anger left. If i get this about a friendship I may find we simply drift away from each other and in time look back at the friendship fondly and the drifting away seems perfectly natural and okay. IOW we aren't enemies, still part of one another on an inner level perhaps but the outer bonds have dispersed...and the inner feelings are open/free/loose.....

Theres more to the Yi than Wilhelms text.

 

[johansen]

Thank you very much Trojan for this additional effort to bring your point of view a little closer to my level of understanding.I 've given it a thought and now see hex 59 in a different way, and , what is more, i like it better.I sounds as if Dispersion meant dissolving the old, removing previous limitations or obstacles, boundries, to make things be visible from a different perspective and then maybe create something more free, spacious. Once a new viewpoint is achieved, a new level of undertanding is gained, things will never be the same (and aren't meant to be).Only by dissolving the old can a renewal take place, individually or possibly as a new connection, which is actually what can be expected from us being apart now.

Thank you all once again.