Love affair, 26.1 to 18

[Emilka]

Hello Everyone,
this is my first post in this Forum. I'm warning - don't blame yourself if you sometimes cannot understand everything I'm saying because my English is still not as well as I want it to be I promise, I'll study hard

I've got some problem with the IC answer about my recently finished relationship. I asked I-Ching about our future, because we've broken up 2 months ago and still have contact, and, in my opinion, we still have sth in common.

The answer was 26.1 changing to 18.
26 - yes, we are veeery formal to each other, we're couple of exes, so, if there is still some kind of positive potential between us, it is well controlled, not to hurt anybody. (I'm the more involved side in my opinion, he declined my trials to rescue our relationship, but he is still contacting me which I cannot fully understand).
26.1 - IC is warning of the danger and I see in this line that there is a necessity to drift apart.
18 - BUT, if this relationship is so dangerous, so why I should heal it? This is my dilemma - whether hexagram 18 shows a rescue for the relationship or rescue for me as an idependent person? I started to see in these hexes definite breakup...

EDIT
A few weeks ago my Ex and I had a month break in our contact, and we didn't talk at all; now we are in touch again. As an afterthought - the hex 18 and THE REPAIR could be connected with the return to the silence between us. Repairing our (especially mine, I think) souls in solitude. I know it's a little bit complicated and I'm really sorry for my garbled trials of explanation ...

I would be pleased if you tell me your opinion, what's going on and how are your feelings about these hexes.

Thank You!
Emilka

 

[goddessliss]

Hi Emika, no break up is ever easy.

Hex 18 - dealing with the corruption this relationship has caused you will bring about your own potential

Hex 26 this is is the right time to let go of this relationship

Line 1 - It is to your advantage to end this relationship NOW. To do this will bring you a lot of good things.

From my own personal experience it is so, so easy to keep going back to a relationship even if we know it is not good for us as it's where we feel comfortable but all we are doing is prolong the hurt.

Liss

 

[Emilka]

Thank you Liss.
I couldn't agree more about the fact that I only suffer and suffer and I'm affraid I'll be suffering even more.
But I love my Ex and I was wondering that the hex 18 gives hope and maybe it is connected with going back to our relationship again, repairing what was damaged... Are you sure that 18 doesn't refer to our return?
Sorry for being such an annoying one... but I'm feeling blue now.

PS Do you think that the line 26.1 is rather advice no to get into it or it idicates how's the future?
Emilka

 

[ginnie]

Line 26.1 says that trouble is headed your way. It says not to do anything about it, because probably there is nothing you can do. So it is saying the opposite of hexagram 18. Repairing or fixing the relationship is not an option. It might be in the back of your mind that this relationship can be fixed. I must say, the warning with line 26.1 is so strong that there is no need to look at the relating hex of 18 at all, as it does not add much to the meaning of line 26.1.

 

[Emilka]

I see. Thanks for your opinion. I must admit that I wanted to assure myself that this is the definite ending between us. I asked I-Ching about his activity (behaviour and steps in general) to me in the future.

Answer: 27.2.6 to 19.
When the 6th line is changing, I always start to read it first, because I've learned that the 6th line refers to the past. Anyway, in 27.2 I see that I'm probably not an appriopriate person for him to live with. But, the hexagram after changing - 19, shows his variables affections for me; he might treat me in very different ways and make me feel confused because of that. He probably may by elated because of my presence, at the same time being repulsive and hostile. Some kind of crazy sinusoid. That's how I feel about the hexagram 19. I would be pleased for any ideas whether I'm right or wrong.

 

[goddessliss]

From personal experience, stop asking, let it go you're only hurting your own heart.

 

[Emilka]

You're right, I know, but sometimes it is really tough to quit asking. Especially, when there is one answer you are gamely trying to hear... Having a break is not a bad idea, but if you have some thoughts, for example about hex 19 - I'll be waiting
Emily

 

[ginnie]

It is logical that you should get hex 19, Approach, since you were asking about whether or not he would be approaching you. The second hexagram, also called the relating hexagram, is not the result, usually. It represents the context in which you are asking your question.

 

[Emilka]

Thanks for your comment, Ginnie.
But I always treated the relating hex as the hex describing future, the outcome of the present situation.

 

[meng]

I see the logic of what has already been suggested.

As I understand line 1 in 26, to stop does not mean to freeze. The power in the hexagram is still there, it's just being restrained for the time being. This opens other possibilities, such as to STOP any impetuous forward drive and to gather your strength, before deciding what will be the better course to take.

 

[Emilka]

Thank you so much, Meng.
I'm trying not to, but I'm still thinking about hex 18 and wondering whether it refers to our return or not.
I'd better stop.