Hello all,

I could use some help with this. I think the cangue is heavy around my ears today.

Seven years ago my brother died unexpectedly. This year, I have missed him horribly, almost as much as the year after he died. He's been coming up in dreams and visions for several people recently. I have so many options for things that I can do tomorrow and am trying to decide what the best path for me to keep a healthy mind. The question that I asked was "What do I need to know or do to get through tomorrow in a healthful way?" Overall, I have been having a very peaceful and wonderful time lately. I just got my blue belt in karate, things are going well at work. I have no love life to speak of, but I have options when and if I choose to take them.

I got 58.1.3.5 > 32. It seems to say that this is a hiccup in an otherwise good time, but I need to be very careful not to put any faith in things that have no basis in reality. Also, do not allow temporary pleasure and excesses to tempt me from the path that I am on. Don't go too far and don't trust in uncertainties.

I was having such a hard time with this reading that I asked for a simplified response to help me put this in perspective. "I'm trying to listen, but I can't hear this clearly. I know you're trying to be helpful. Can you please clarify this in a way that I can hear today?"

I got 55.2.3 > 54. From this, it seems to say that I'm in a situation where it is just hard for me to see and I don't need to do anything. I just need to be aware of the inferior man who can use this time in my life to step in and derail me from my path or that I am so in the dark that I'm unable to do anything useful and will injure myself if I flail around in the dark.

From the two, I'm getting that I should settle down and ride it out without relying too much on others with their own agenda. And I shouldn't spend the day drinking until I pass out, which was another consideration (I don't drink much often, but today seems like a good day to do so to me). Or maybe that the hangover isn't going to seem so worth it on Monday when I have to go to work. Maybe be gentle to myself, recognize that it's temporary, and keep from getting in trouble?

I think 55.2.3>54 may be pointing out that trying to answer this again in a different way would lead to an abundance of information, and leave you in the dark. You would have to try to marry both answers (hex 54). Misfortune may result from this.

I would focus on the first answer.

My deepest sympathies, Suivis. I'm sure it is a challenge to get through such a tragic loss. 58 talks about kicking back with friends and sharing your feelings, and just basically having a good time. Find some joy in your day... But not in diversions. Don't be tricked by diversions is basically what I'm getting from the lines here. Might be saying to let the pain go... Allow yourself to be happy, and really connect with other people... This will allow you to endure through this time(hex 32).

According to Wilhelm:

THE JUDGMENT

THE JOYOUS. Success.
Perseverance is favorable.

THE IMAGE

Lakes resting one on the other:
The image of THE JOYOUS.
Thus the superior man joins with his friends
For discussion and practice.

Thank you. Most years other than the first haven't been too bad, but there have been a lot of situations this year where I really could have used his perspective and insight.

I agree entirely about the second one. It's very much like the question I posed was reflected back on me. "Well Duh. You're in a dark place and are having a hard time finding your way out. Any more and your head will explode!"

I like your interpretation of the first one. I was thinking of just going driving around and listening to music (my oldest and bestest friend). It's one of my favorite things to do and something we used to share a lot. "Talking" to him. One of my friends suggested writing a letter and burning it with sandalwood. I've been forcing myself to be around people this week and I'm about worn out. One of my friends told me last night that no one had any idea that I was upset at all until I left abruptly. I'm not good about sharing.

The phrases that comes to mind here is emotional support and life philosophy. Receiving and giving it. Also, 58 implies to me, perhaps a need to exchange ideas with friends. Your ideas about life, perhaps the meaning of life, or any other questions about what it's all about. You know, whatever is in your head that deep down you know you need to share. All that information in your mind that isn't connected with any meaning. Find that meaning together with a group of friends. Says this will create a lightness of being for you. Just my take on this.


Wilhelm

A lake evaporates upward and thus gradually dries up; but when two lakes are joined they do not dry up so readily, for one replenishes the other. it is the same in the field of knowledge. Knowledge should be a refreshing and vitalizing force. It becomes so only through stimulating intercourse with congenial friends with whom one holds discussion and practices application of the truths of life. in this way learning becomes many-sided and takes on a cheerful lightness, whereas there is always something ponderous and one-sided about the learning of the self-taught.

Oh, we must have been writing at the same time. Now my post looks a little weird there. Oh well Yes, it is difficult to share these kinds of feelings and thoughts. But I think you would be surprised how many people will have experiences to share with you as well. And insights. Keeping all this to yourself might be isolating you, and alienating your friends. Sharing your feelings may open the door for connecting, and rather than isolating you, help you move past your pain and create strong bonds with others.

My sister died in a car accident 9 years ago, so believe me, I have an idea where you are coming from. It stinks to lose a sibling, and really makes one aware of their own mortality too. Plus, is someone you thought would be around until you grow old. Well, at least that is how it was for me.

But I think the Yi is saying move past the pain. That there is joy out there for you. Make some room for it. When you feel pain, feel it, and then let it go. Don't immerse yourself in it alone. Connect with friends and have some fun. You will always miss your brother, but that doesn't mean you will always suffer.

Again, this is just what this made me think of. I"m sure other members will have some insights as well.

It's not easy, and I appreciate your loss. A couple of healthful ways that have worked for me:

Lighting a candle, especially at church. Some churches have candles that can be lit any day and some have a yearly service around All Saints Day in November when everyone goes up and lights a candle for their loved ones. Online, I like this one: http://www.gratefulness.org/candles/enter.cfm?l=eng

I don’t think it’s unusual to sense a person’s presence every once in awhile. For me, living a life that honors the other person helps me feel like we’re still somehow connected in this huge life task.

Doing something personal. A dedication, writing, song, art, ritual, accomplishment, to keep doing things for them and loving them in a meaningful and tangible way.

I had a wonderful time during the day. I went to a show where I learned a lot of new things, went and hung out with some new friends and talked about things that I haven't talked with them before, bought some things that remind me of my bubby. My friends were very surprised to hear some of what I think but it was all very good.

I also saw a guy that I've had a weird fling with and sent him a text that he didn't respond to. Yi tells me that the consequences of the text mean he views me more clearly. I didn't expect him to respond since what I sent hits some major past issue for both of us. Yi also tells me that our relationship should be on much more stable footing now, but we still need to talk.

Overall, it was a wonderful day. I missed him. I did things that we would have really enjoyed and felt like he was with me. I'm feeling less disconnected from my new friends. It was a beautiful day.