Hi.
I must admit I feel silly asking this, but to be honest I have issues interpreting unchanging hexagrams and the situation itself is driving me nuts, so I need help.
To give you some context, I am confused. About a month ago, someone returned to my life, a previous love interest, but now he returned as a friend. The confusion comes from me, because nothing has happened, he hasn't done or said anything to manifest that he has any interest towards me other than being friends, etc.
The problem is, I think I like him. I don't want to say that I'm in love with him, but I do have deep feelings for him, which in turns make me think about just dropping everything and remove him from my life, because he doesn't seem to return my feelings. Sometimes I think he does, but since nothing really happens, I can only give testament to what he is showing. I sometimes feel that he wants us to be more, but I also feel restraint on his part, for which I'm actually thankful, because I don't want him to get involved with me without being sure of what he feels or what he wants, which was the reason why we were apart for several months. I, on the other hand, am screwed. Whenever I'm with him I feel pure joy. I get lost in our conversations, I feel we speak the same language and I love his quirks and singularities.
I do ask the Yi about us sometimes, but mainly short term questions (i.e., what to expect of our evening together and such). Today, though, since I'm feeling the weight of this a bit more, I asked the Yi guidance on advice regarding this whole situation. I got 24 unchanging, Returning.
I have my own take on this, but I would really love to hear other's opinions (mainly that the advice would be to let go of the old and make room for the new). As I said, unchanging hex are difficult for me to interpret.
Thanks

lysithea said:

Whenever I'm with him I feel pure joy. I get lost in our conversations, I feel we speak the same language and I love his quirks and singularities.

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Sounds like you have a strong affinity for him and his ways. The hex 24 seems to point to your returning to a natural pattern that is part of your nature.

"to and fro will go the way"

I asked the Yi guidance on advice regarding this whole situation.

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What a lovely question, lysithea. 24 unchanging seems to give you very balanced advice.

I'm seeing this as your friend returning and opening doors. No way to know yet what the outcome will be, but this is about process, I believe. Bradford's translation suggests setting a direction:

The longest night at last ends in dawn, the great wheel again spins towards spring. Locked in winter’s frost the frozen seed abides, a conception, but a long way from birth. Winter begins today, but the bottom of this cold lags six weeks behind, on the near side of hope for the best, and spring’s promises kept. The change will not be abrupt, but trust in the wheel’s direction suggests it is on an acceptable course.

It would seem that you and your friend both have an opportunity to take your time to develop this relationship in the most advantageous way possible, toward friendship or passion or commitment.

Your delight about his return is wonderful; perhaps he feels the same way but is taking it slowly to be sure you don't rush into something that cannot be sustained in the long term.

Bradford again:
to and fro will go the way, here we go and come again, right back to where we belong. And this does not mean we must live there all of the time, any more than needing to sleep means sleeping all of the time. But is this not a high, holy thing to spend some time where we belong?

Worthwhile to have somewhere to go:
Firmness prevails
(In) returning one sees the heart of heaven (and) earth!

Play it by heart and the direction that develops will be correct for both of you. I wish you all the best.

Thanks Ginnie and Poised. I think you are right and I have to let things develop. Hex 24 is all about cycles. Its scary, though.

Just an update on this issue. Things are not going very well and they have been weird. For a while, I felt we were growing closer. We would hang out and talk regularly, really enjoying ourselves -or so I thought-. He seemed genuinly happy to be around me and I was certainly happy to be around him.
Even before the original post, he said he was going out on vacation on the 30th. The Thursday before that he called me in the evening asking if he could come to my place to hang out because it was his last free night before leaving on vacation, I said yes. We had gone out to the movies on the previous Sunday and it was a pretty nice day, with him saying that we should go camping one day, and have dinner at my grampa's favourite restaurant, talking a lot, etc. then calling the next day and being very sweet. Anyways, Thursday came, he came over, stayed until 2am. Nothing happened, we just talked and talked about random things.
After that he went silent. I did a few readings during the week and they were all very confusing. Not negative necessarely, but along the lines of "good things are coming but just not yet".
Sunday he was supposed to be back and to be honest I started feeling sad. I asked: what am I for him (I know, shouldn't ask that, but I did). And got The Well, no changing lines. Then I asked what he was for me and I got Hex. 33 with all lines changing except the 5th. From what I read, besides the literal meaning of the lines itself, the advice of all of them is to "stop asking".
So today I did a final casting and asked: What should I expect from this situation: 38.1 to 64. And then: what should my attitude be, and got: 11 Unchanging. So this is supposed to be just a phase and I should be fine with it? I have this feeling of gloom and doom that can't seem to be able to shake off.

You've seen this thread on 24uc already I guess but just in case http://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/frie...eriences-with-Unchanging-Castings-Hexagram-24

I see your avatar as a chimp cleaning it's teeth in the lavatory bowl. Am I seeing it right ? I always find it slightly disturbing because the bowl looks full of toilet cleaner and I imagine the chimp will either get bugs from cleaning his teeth in the lavatory or will ingest chemicals.

Now I've got the unfortunate chimp off my mind I guess I may as well look at the casts.

Generally 24uc points to return to your own path. In your case perhaps it may mean your relationship has a new start...In which case 24uc would indicate you won't see the light anytime soon. I mean 24uc signifies winter solstice, the longest night. After the longest night then the days begin to get longer, but even though this signifies spring coming, we know we won't feel the warm sun for a few more months. Perhaps renewal with him is like that ? I don't know if it's that or return to your own path here.

Sunday he was supposed to be back and to be honest I started feeling sad. I asked: what am I for him (I know, shouldn't ask that, but I did). And got The Well, no changing lines

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A resource ? It's a difficult one to apply to the question. There is a thread on 48uc so maybe there are some other ideas there.

Then I asked what he was for me and I got Hex. 33 with all lines changing except the 5th. From what I read, besides the literal meaning of the lines itself, the advice of all of them is to "stop asking".

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So you have 33.1.2.3.4.6>60. It's important to write it out, saves people work, you'll get more answers. Also the relating hexagram of 60 is important here...but how ? Not sure...it sort of looks like getting the right timing for strategic retreat. Perhaps he is wanting to manage your expectations by only giving you a certain amount of himself. Strange because the yang change pattern is 14 and yin pattern is 8. It's a cliché but maybe he is scared of too much involvement BUT actually he does need to make his mind up because it's painful for you

today I did a final casting and asked: What should I expect from this situation: 38.1 to 64

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It appears that you cannot expect much right now and he has engineered things so that you don't know what to expect as I said in last answer. If someone is managing your expectations they are making sure, by their behaviour, that you keep your expectations fairly low and fairly loose. 38.1 says let him do his thing. Don't follow him or contact him and it seems he will be back.

And then: what should my attitude be, and got: 11 Unchanging. So this is supposed to be just a phase and I should be fine with it? I have this feeling of gloom and doom that can't seem to be able to shake off.

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Well you have a lot of unchanging hexagrams and if you read the 11uc thread I doubt it will comfort you.....Sometimes uc hexagrams give you no perspective on a situation. There is no relating hexagram so no place for you to stand to view it....you are just in it. Hexagram 11 can be a choppy ride.


I think you need to have patience and not expect to feel the sunshine too soon but to be aware the longest night is past. Practically it seems best to let him go so he can come back when he's ready.

Having said all that it's not a situation I feel, Yi aside, that can go on indefinitely. I've a feeling the answers you have received are quite plain and factual. If you want him it seems you have to wait....but I wouldn't encourage anyone to wait for anyone on the basis of an answer from Yi...because who knows when the straying horse will return ? When you're 90 ?

So I think these are quite plain factual answers from Yi, but it is up to you whether you wish to follow that advice.

Hi Trojina!
First, must address the Chimp issue. Yes, indeed she is brushing her teeth in the toilet. The reason for that Avatar is that I used to have that poster in my bathroom growing up

Now, back to the readings. I hear ya. And I welcome the advice. I actually don't want to talk to him, I'm too hurt right now. I don't even want an explanation -not that I deserve one, technically we are nothing- I will have to look up the 11 uc post though, because from what I read in one of my little books it was quite positive (albeit slow)



I'll let things run their course, put the coins aside and come what may.

Biting my own tongue 42.5, 1, and 1.3

So I guess I didn't put my coins aside. I rarely get trigger happy when I do readings, but the times are weird and I guess so am I nowadays.

Last night I was feeling really sad. TBH I have quite a hard time opening up to people and when it happens, and when something like what is happening happens, its a very hard blow for me. So since I was feeling rather unhappy last night, I asked the Yi: "Will I be ever happy?" And got 42.5 to 27. Recognition of unselfish acts that bring happiness, recognition of goodness, but at the same time how the pure heart doesn't demand recognition... In some more predictive translations I got it literally said: Yes, you will be happy (cue tears). I think I get the message. Maybe it is to stop looking for happiness in how others relate to me. Still, it felt blah. I try to be the best I can be, I don't think you ever stop trying to be good, fair or giving. I consider myself all those things, although as every human being I have my shortcomings. I really don't know what else I am supposed to do. Maybe I am missing the point.

After that and after an awful night with dreams about cats falling from buildings into my apartment, of all things (woke up with a migraine, am very dizzy so didn't go to the office) I asked if there was anything I could do to improve this situation. I got Hex 1.3 to 10. I interpret it as an opening of the chance of influencing, but without an immediate reward. Also, being careful not to let energies dissipate, not to lose focus. Thread carefully (hex 10) think before you do anything. Not like I will do anything in the first place. Thoughts?

And then I did a casting for this day. Asked if there was something to expect from this particular day and got hex 1 unchanging (again with the uc hexagrams). I read the UC hex 1 thread and the jury is still delivering in how to interpret it. Not getting my hopes up.

Any thoughts?

I have an idea. It will be hard, but tell him how you feel about him. Then you will find out how he feels about you. Sometimes women have thought I don't like them in the past, when I actually did. It was because I didn't quite have the courage to make a move or bc I feel pretty jaded these days after going through alot of bullsh** from ppl and it's hard for me to say the signs are good for me making a move bc ppl who obviously liked me, loved me, got really close to me over time have suddenly just changed their mind overnight, even long term relationships where we talked about marriage.

I'm pretty sure there isn't a law of the universe saying the man has to be first to show courage, so give it a shot and then you'll know and either way you can stop beating that horse. Yes, you may lose, but you can't lose what you haven't really got and there will be someone else out there who will return the same feelings.

By the way, if someone hangs out with you talking until 2am...

Thanks Kincade I have considered it, believe me, but... Wish it was that simple. He was the one who backed away the last time and changed his mind about us. As I said in the original post, this has been basically me and what I feel, not so much him. Yes, some of these attitudes make you think that he does have feelings for me, but then he pulls a stunt like this and I hesitate. Yes he does stay until 2am but then he dissappears for almost 2 weeks.
He did sort of show proof of life yesterday. Random, silly comment in one of my fb postings. Nothing changed though. It was such a silly thing I didn't really know how to answer (one of those things that make you scratch your head and say: huh? really? after 12 days? this?
So I asked what to expect after this separation and got 17.1.4.5.6 turning to 23 (lol). I know relating hexagram can be context and it is related to the actual question, but if it isn't context and is more of a conclusion, then, well, very self explanatory. As far as the changing lines of 17 I see
1. Since the question was "what to expect" I see a change in my objectives, but maintaining my integrity and what is important.
4. Beware of brown noses. Keep the Ego at bay. I see this as a warning of not keeping my hopes up and stay grounded.
5. Focus in what is true and real, you are on the right track.
6. Seek advice. (ask again later?)

Being in a situation like this myself in the past and hearing stories like that, I actually end up with the conclusion that a good and meaningful relationship always froms much more easily than this ... draining situation. I don't know if it's our ego or we are truly in love but we don't see clearly. I don't know if the object of our desire has feelings for us or if he/she us as source (48) to sustain his confidence. What I do know is that we should be around people that makes us feel good, calm and not doubting ourselves all the time. Because from what I can see these stories never end somewhere.