Hi ya'll

Would firstly like to say a big thank you for all your insights. I have found this site really helpful while trying to gain 'clarity' with some recent situations in my life.

Right now though I have something going on which is totally out of my remit. This is a work question. I'm in a bit of bother with my superior and I've been foolishly trying to upwardly manage. The situation has now got me into hot water and because of my frankness to our working relationship my superior wants to put me through a disciplinary based on the way I spoke and it not being appropriate. This is even though I was trying to come from a good place, get our working relationship stronger and thus make my boss' job easier. Its only had the reverse effect though. It might help to add that my boss is very old school, timid and gentle where as I'm completely the opposite. I'm very open about my feelings. I am able to totally keep my emotions in check but I just think I've pushed things a little too far this time. I've been clear that I've taken on board all her comments... I understand my boundaries now and have tried to assure her that we can work through this. However she does still seem strongly to want to go through with this. I've asked her to reconsider, that it could be disastrous for our future working relationship, but I don't think she will. It seems so unreasonable and drastic for her to go to these lengths. I'd understand if we had already had the discussion and she felt I was still doing it... but hey ho - perhaps this is my lesson that I have to take... I can't change people - only myself.

Admittedly I've gone a bit crazy with the questions for the Ching and have been asking them from my bosses point of view as well as from my own. I've just confused myself and was hoping that one of you fine folk could add some clarity to my situation.

The questions i've asked are as follows:

What's going on!? Why is she not wanting to work at this? 57.1.3.4 > 10
Will she go through with it? (I've asked her to re-consider) 34.3.5 > 58
What should I do? (should I give as good as I get) 62.1 > 55
So should I take next week off until my colleague returns? 21.1.6 . 16

Sorry to bombard... any clarity would be gratefully received.

Thanks and big love

What's going on!? Why is she not wanting to work at this? 57.1.3.4 > 10

It because of her nature, if she lets your behavior towards her go then she suspects that you will become even more dominating and forthright over time, so she has decided it must stop. She is not doing this to hurt you but rather to curb you as you seem to be getting to be above yourself and what would happen if others followed your example? Change your behaviour and all will be well again.

Will she go through with it? (I've asked her to re-consider) 34.3.5 > 58

Perhaps if you apologize and sincerely tell her that you will never speak out like you did before, and that you will in future mind your own business and stick your head in your own work, then maybe she will relent.

What should I do? (should I give as good as I get) 62.1 > 55

I think you should be very careful in what you say from now on, if you decide to be outspoken yet again, then you will have your moment of fame in the office, then you will be out of there permanently.

So should I take next week off until my colleague returns? 21.1.6 . 16

Why? You are guilty and you know it, the sentence that you have received has been mild, but be stubborn and cantankerous and then she will slap you real hard next time, don't runaway or push your luck, as you are not in a good position to do so.