Hi everyone
I'm not an expert, but most of the time, I can interpret a simple situation when I ask the Iching questions. This one time, I asked:
"How do I make my family's life better?"
The answer doesn't sound good, but for some reason I can't see how it answers my question.
It was hex. 36 changing lines 2 and 3 to hex 19
Whenever I see hex 19, I'm really scared because of the sentence "When the eight month comes, there will be misfortune", especially when I think I will be moving down to south of my state for my education in August.
To my opinion, hex 36.2 is trying to tell me, when bad times come, if I just keep hanging on and make sure I can provide for my family as best as I could, then everything will be fine? I can't understand line 3 at all.
Ok, so I'm trying to see and understand. I just graduate with a Bachelor's degree and now in pursuit of a Master's degree. I'm in debt and my parents are working really hard to pay for my education. So I asked the Iching how I can make it better, and the iching gives me darkening of the light? Hmm....sorry I'm rambling on hehe. I hope someone can help me with the interpretation? Thank you so much!

36. says you are not in a position to do a whole lot in the outer world just now, you have to first complete your education. You must "veil your light, yet still it shines." So focus on your studies with the intention of improving your family's situation after you have completed this necessary first step.
36.2 There may be some things you can do for the family even though you are not in a strong position. Just do what you can for now.
36.3 You may have some good fortune and be able to do more than you expected, but you needn't think you have to take on the world and change everything over night!
-rosada

Well, I am no expert at interpreting for others, so please bear with me if obtuse or obvious. But I see other possibilities.

Although "darkening of the light" is always intimidating, the particular lines seem to indicate merit in your efforts to take care of your family, not just yourself, in your pursuit of education. The third line might indicate that although times are hard now, and it will take time and planning to extracate yourself from the difficulties of the situation - such as debt, Sallie Mae is such a hateful gal - it will come. Keep working. It will come.

"Approaching" also contains the aspects of "becoming great." From Rabelais: "Success is certain. But we must work with determination and perseverance
to make full use of the propitiousness of the time." These hexagrams likely indicate that although times are somewhat "dark" now, if you make use of your resources and opportunities now you WILL be successful in your endeavors.

I don't always see the "eigth month" statement as a direct correlation with time. Just a reminder that time always cycles, propitiousness (word?) now does not mean it will last forever. In other words, "make hay while the sun shines."

The particular flow of the hexagrams can be intimidating at first glance. Reading "darkening of the light approaching." But that does not seem the best fit to me, on deeper interpretation. I't's not the "vibe" I get from you or the situation.

For what it's worth, "darkening of the light" is kind of a backhanded compliment, at least in my readings. When I'm off track or being blatantly stupid - and sometimes when I'm just in new territory and learning - I get Hex 4. But "darkening" seems to indicate the Yi finds something worthy in me, a skill or happiness, that is temporarily being dimmed. Or even that I need to "hide my light" to work towards a larger goal.

Anyway. Hope that helps. Best wishes. Been there.

My guess, somewhat siding with Rosada. Maybe your family will feel fine as long as you deliver, so go for your Master's with the strength of a horse. Three might say that you are at the top of cultivation. Take time to consider that by doing well what you are doing you can overcome your darker thoughts about the dependency.
You'd make everybody happy doing what you are doing (Overview with obedience to the situation).

I regard 19 primarily as demonstrating leadership and responsibility, and making best use of opportune times, which is the context of your question and reading.

36 protects your light from harm's way, but it also can create a false sense of security. School is not the real work-a-day world, it is a purely academic institution. I personally know of cases where people have become debilitated through over education. Unable to function in a work environment, they become professional students, and perhaps eventually teachers of some kind, if only in their own minds. So I think you have to be honest and conscientious about establishing a balance between furthering your academic achievements and facing the cold wind that's blowing outside of that cave.

More importantly to your immediate state, if the above is accurate, that means that you may already have become afraid of leaving the cave, and that can create all sorts of self-doubt and confusion. Remember your fire is your fire, it goes where you go, not where the cave goes. Take care of your fire, and your family.

hi uoffl,

sounds like a tough place where you are right now but you've got a very encouraging answer imo (and some great advice about it here too!). My first thoughts on your reading were that it points towards taking a temporary job while you prepare for your next step in your studies, or maybe do a part-time job along your studying. I know this is not always easy and at times it might feel like a darkening of your light, having to juggle both work and study (especially if your program is a very competitive and challenging one) but you are young and strong (a good horse ) and you can find your way out of this (36.3) . . in this way you could relieve your parents from the financial weight and even get a feeling of accomplishment in knowing that you are taking some charge of your life . .
The image I get from 36 to 19 is someone working till the small hours and believe me when I say that I know this can be exhausting . . I've had a similar experience and although it wasn't always easy, it did give me a sense of hidden pride knowing I can be as good as my fellow students with less of their luxuries ()

p.s: it could be that I'm stating the obvious here and maybe you have a job already and you ask for further help . . not very sure about it from what you've written -if so, ignore the above but don't throw the baby with the bathwater: your reading is very encouraging even if a bit scary at first sight . .

wish you all the best!!

Thanks everyone!
I kind of see it now in a way for hex 19.
Rodaki, you are right. At this time, I can help my family by looking for a temporary job. I've been doing that since I graduated a few weeks ago, but I'm in the U.S, and the jobs are very hard to find. I'm still looking for jobs though hehe. So in a way, 19 sounds as if I can do the most while I'm at home for these 8 months, and then once I move down south, I won't be able to do as much.
Meng, you are right about the difference between the real world and school. I'm struggling to find my place in the real world right now while I'm waiting on the start of my education. That's why it creates emotional times for me as I feel I'm not doing anything right and can't help my family.
I appreciate all everyone's help! I hope you all have a great weekend!

uoffl said:

That's why it creates emotional times for me as I feel I'm not doing anything right and can't help my family.

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That must be a terrible feeling. Regardless which path you choose, feeling inadequate isn't helpful to carry around on your back.

I think you said you have some time between now and when school begins in the south? Rather than looking at which path to take, how about looking to establish a stronger base of who you are? Then you can better choose and follow your path.

19 is an overseeing caregiver. This aspect of deity (and/or of yourself) offers leadership in a nurturing way, as a mother (earth) looks over her daughter (lake). 19 is a limited time window of opportunity, so the young one has to make the most of the time.

So today something happened that makes me think about what the iching gave me as an answer
"Darkening of the Light" "Approaching"
Is there anytime when the Iching actually will tell you straight out, Darkening of the light is approaching?
My dad is a person who's quick tempered and...irrational. When things don't go his way, he usually threatens my mom by quitting his job. My family is already poor, so it takes both of my parents to put food on the table and keep shelter over our heads. Whenever my dad does that, my mom gets extremely stressed out and scared. So something happened today, that might lead to that. This would fit the answer the Iching gave me, right?

And thank you, meng.
It is an uncomfortable feeling to carry. One of my really close friends told me "If you feel like you're failing, then do something about it"
She finally told me this after a few times where she kept telling me "No, you're being too hard on yourself, you can only concentrate on studying so you can make sure you'll succeed once you get out, and help your family then". I think she got annoyed at my whines haha.
So I'm helping around the house as much as I can, try to save money as much as I can, just doing what I can hehe, and being on top of my school work, ooh and volunteer for my community to give back =D

Hi uoffl. Don't know if you need this, but my heart really goes out to you. I've always been blessed, but grew up poor with a very ill mother and no pops. Worked very hard at academics to try and make enough money to take care of my family -it was my best attempt, but it was a lonnnngggggg stressful journey. Which I ended up finding out was really "society's" recommendation for a solution to the dilemna, instead of what really worked. But you have to search your own heart about whether your path is the correct one for you and your family, we all do, and I wouldn't presume on that.

I really only have experience with the way the Yi communicates with me, and I imagine that long-term interaction with the Yi ends up in somewhat "customized" or "shorthand" readings. But I will offer how the Yi talks with me, in case it could benefit you.

Sometimes the Yi does communicate with me with one whole hexagram transitioning to the other, such as "darkening of the light approaching." When the Yi is offering a more global aspect, or simplifying as answer so I can better grasp the meaning.

However, when "danger" is approaching - from another person or otherwise - I usually get "pitfalls." If I'm concerned about a personal interaction, the Yi has been very kind to me when I ask about what I need to be vigilant about with a particular person. The Yi will also tell me what I can do to ease the situation or facilitate a better outcome.

Don't know if this is the correct way, formally, to interact with the I Ching. All I know is that when I approach the Yi from the perspective of taking personal responsibility, finetuning my own actions to better a situation instead of trying to "look inside" the inner workings of others, the Yi has been very kind. Perhaps that would work for you?

Really hope that helps. I hear stress, hard times; I remember lots of overwork, between school work and jobs, for not enough money anyway. With the added responsibility of trying to care for the people you love. I so hope you are taking care of yourself in this dark time.

For what it's worth, I DID succeed despite the long haul of trying to achieve academically with limited funds. Got my master's degree; made pretty good money for a while; but it ended up a choice between me being around without much money or being away from my mom, making decent change. Turned out she needed my presence more. More complicated than that, may be completely different for you. Just food for thought.

With love.

I would like to say about that "eighth month" business--I always understood it to mean that you must not try to harvest to early, or give birth prematurely -- that this is the warning in that line. It doesn't definitely assert that something bad will happen in the eighth month (which in the chinese year s more like October, anyway), it's just saying that trying to push for something you want to happen too soon is ill-advised.

I have a slightly different "take" on your hexagrams, uof

Hexagram 36 sometimes means "to begin the work of rescue," which seems extremely appropriate, since you asked how you could help your family.

I'd like to point out that hex 19 means a lot of things, but in the position of the relating hex I don't think it means that everything will fall apart in the eighth month; that is, August, when you go to graduate school. To my way of understanding this reading, you got H19 because you were asking about "stepping up to the bat" to help your family, primarily financially, in the manner of a responsible adult. Wanting to assume more of a leadership role in your family was the context of your question.

Here's how I understand your moving lines:

34.2: Persist with your school studies at all costs. You will find the strength you need to make it. Pay particular attention to complying with all the rules and regulations. In the academic world, that's very important.

34.3: Your dad. Your dad is the one who is the impediment, the one creating disorder and instability in the family. Please understand that even though he tends to get irrational at times and throw everything into havoc, this problem is not something that you are going to be able to solve anytime soon. Best to put your dad on the back burner and not worry about it. You really should not dwell on this. It would be bad for you to do so and your worrying about this would not help one thing: your education, your family, or the money situation. Do NOT challenge or accuse your father. Just leave the whole issue completely alone for now.

I think the Yi has answered indirectly your question of how you can help your family, because it's going to be step by step, not all at once. I think it's saying, Stay low, Do your studies, Keep your thoughts off your dad.

ginnie,
Your interpretation really makes sense, especially for the changing line 3 of hexagram 36. This situation with my dad has been going on since...forever, and I can't fix it. So I just best comfort/take care of my mom and my sister, and study. Thank you so much =D

Ruschel, thank you for the motivation. I'm so happy you succeeded. It gives me hope that hard work will be rewarded at the end. It is always best to spend time with your family. I usually do my work at night when everyone went to sleep so I can spend the day time with my sister. My mom's always at work so hopefully once I'm done with school and earn enough money, I can pay off the debts so she can spend more time with us. Moms always have such big hearts don't they? =D
I hope you and your mom the best!

Uoffl, thank you for the nice words. But, as gently as I can, my message was partly that our ideas of "success" may be completely different. Moms always having such big hearts? No, not necessarily. It's completely ok, everyone has different takes on the words of the Yi, part of what I love about this site is that we can all offer our best, and a person can take what they need. But my interpretations do not seem to be offering what you need. Others are better serving your questions, so I will leave the interpretations to them.

Best wishes and love.

Hello again. I just wanted to apologize if my writing this morning was not my most gracious of answers . No excuses, but had just awakened and was slightly gobsmacked.

Don't know if this matters. But was I was trying to do was to teach what I have learned about talking to the Yi on your own to find your answers. Guess the value of that depends on "where you are" in relation to growing with the Yi. Others offerred excellent interpretations that seem to have better supported you, bolstered you, brought you wisdom and comfort. I think that's a beautiful thing, and I am glad you found that here.

But to me, in my humble opinion, it's the difference between others "catching your fish" vs. learning to "fish for yourself." One can feed you for a while (and we all need that when we're learning), the other will allow you to feed yourself for a lifetime . . .

Obviously, I still have a lot of growing to do myself lol. However, I offerred my background only to illustrate that it seems I have possibly walked a path similar to your, tried a similar "solution" to economic problems and family problems, and found all that work didn't solve a damn thing. Hope it's very different for you, but can't responsibly offer my experience and not say that.

I'm not the point here. You are . But, despite your kindness, your answer left me feeling "not heard" and somewhat minimized. Had to find my own answers to the problems you are addressing long ago, about mothers and family and college and money . . . I have lots of other questions and problems and complications, of course. But "cookie cutter" platitudes about problems already conquered ... uoffl, this may not be a good thing, but I am way older, wearier, battle-hardened, and grouchier than that .

At any rate. Please forgive me for any offense. I will take whatever criticism I have earned.

ruschel said:

when "danger" is approaching - from another person or otherwise - I usually get "pitfalls." If I'm concerned about a personal interaction, the Yi has been very kind to me when I ask about what I need to be vigilant about with a particular person. The Yi will also tell me what I can do to ease the situation or facilitate a better outcome.

For what it's worth, I DID succeed despite the long haul of trying to achieve academically with limited funds. Got my master's degree; made pretty good money for a while; but it ended up a choice between me being around without much money or being away from my mom, making decent change. Turned out she needed my presence more. More complicated than that, may be completely different for you. Just food for thought.

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This is an extremely subtle and caring post, Ruschel. It's difficult to compare the hopes and plans -- and putcomes -- of different people over the Internet, because it's completely impossible.

You were reassuring about hexagram 19 not meaning the approach of disaster. You are a warm-hearted person. An academic degree is not the answer for a lot of people, but then again -- since all our lives are a little different -- well, I wouldn't want to generalize, because I don't actually have much basis for doing that . . . but I do think that the lines are telling Ouf to keep her poor Dad on the back burner . . . not to center her thoughts on him and his troubles.