1.4.6 > 5 How best to proceed in this relationship

[JoeCampbell]

1.4.6 > 5 What are the prospects forthis relationship

Hello again,

The story that you have been witness to through my earlier postings has developed. Through support and rebuilding after the attack (my last post) to sharing a wonderful summer together and now, today, to my beloved saying that she wants to split up, that she needs time alone to begin to take responsibility for her own life. I have to agree with the last bit.
She is under pressure (mostly from herself I think) to move town to get away from the ex and that is the plan (it might change now, I won't know). But she lives and grew up in the same place and is really not a mover so this whole thing is very traumatic. Basically I think she wants to find out if she can stay in her home town and be safe there, that the ex- will keep out of her life.
So we split up....I am pretty numb right now but made it clear that I still love her and would wait and that my door is open. I asked Yi "What are the prospects for a relationship with me and P from now on?" and the reply came back 1.4.6 > 5 which I, via Lise and the other threads here, take as positive...wait, hold back, be open, non-doing....which, in my wishful thinking at the moment, I take to mean that by giving her space and time, we will get back together.
Does this sound like a reasonable interpretation?

Thank you
Joe

 

[precision grace]

I don't know Joe, it doesn't look that great to me.

You asked about the prospects for the relationship so the lines could be talking about both of you or one of you or line each, I don't know. 1.4 seems to me to be about her and the decision to take that big leap - now I don't know if that means leaving the town or having a proper relationship with you. 1.6 warns against arrogance and says that overbearing dragon will have cause for regret - who is the overbearing dragon here? You seem very nice and willing to do what is needed and asked, so who in this story thinks they can bypass or circumvent the laws of nature? With the resulting 5, the long wait, you know that that's what you are in for, so I'm not sure it's being very informative. I'm sorry that I cannot figure out whether the 1.4.6 relates to the situation that had lead to this long wait or what will happen during the long wait. Either way, I'd look at that 1.6 very carefully and try to avoid it.

 

[kash]

So you have been asking a lot of questions about this relationship already? (Sorry, I've not seen the other threads). If you have been asking regularly, then this answer might be telling you about the short term situation. This is what I find happens often with my readings.

Here's my sort of vague take on it:

Line 4 talks about the dragon jumping up and down to try and advance or leap over a pond or something. It talks about the need to act with the timing. Knowing when to advance and when to stop. Line 6 is a warning of what happens when you lose sight of when to stop and become too pushy or too eager to advance. Hex 5 I think talks about your current situation - you are waiting for this woman to make up her mind and come back to you. So I am not sure what it's telling you about the long term prospects if any, but it is telling you to be attentive, keep trying but also know when to stop advancing.

 

[mryou1]

...wait, hold back, be open, non-doing....

I think this might be one of those cases where you read what you want into the I Ching's response...

A different answer is staring you right in the face.

Hexagram 1 is EVERYTHING but those words you described. full force yang energy. It is the fight as opposed to flight. Now I see where the waiting comes from, with the second hexagram, but that's channeled through the first. If you want a relationship, try fighting for it a little bit, but be careful and patient (5).

Then again, the character xu, hexagram 5, more than wait literally means: "to need". So the summed up combination is like "Yang needs [blank]". Since you're asking about this relationship, we could assume "your Yang needs this relationship". It's your yin that's admitting defeat.

Now I'm not saying be forceful or weird to her, but if she's only moving because of her ex... aren't there ways to fix that? Have you tried talking to this guy, saying: "Hey you're really bothering my girlfriend, I need you to stop"?

(So I just typed that out and then decided to look at your last couple posts)

Yeah, some people aren't fighters, but unless this guy's a boxer or something, have you considered a confrontation with this *******? Even if it's verbal, make it forceful and set boundaries. It'd be to keep someone safe from apparently rape and abuse so the "good" is obviously on your side.

Or does he still not even know you exist?

This situation is a little strange tbh. So much of this relationship's decisive power has just been compulsively given to a third power.

 

[JoeCampbell]

Mryou1, you are so beautifully, wonderfully right - thank you. The day developed to an agreement that we are out of touch, "free" for 2 months, then we'll meet and decide what to do next . And yes, so much of this is because, basically she desperately wants to stay in her home town but if she does, the ex- has made it clear that she will never have another relationship...he knows she has a "friend", that's all.
So I will bide my time for two months, meet with her and if its obvious that we are still both in love but he is the problem, then I will confront him....
He's a big fish in a small, scared pond, and he fires off all my triggers related to bullies....
I'll be sure to keep you posted..

 

[JoeCampbell]

And by the way, back on the 1st of June I asked Yi "What should I expect from my relationship with P?" and got 1 > 2 (1 with all lines changing). I took this to be auspicious....

 

[JoeCampbell]

Just want to close this one. I didn't confront the guy, but things did come to a head when he, drunk and supposedly looking after their daughter, called my girlfriend and yelled at her, asked who I was and said he loved her....she got him to calm down, the grandmother to collect the child and then, when she returned home, she sought legal advice.
When it was carefully explained to him what would happen if he made contact to her again, he accepted the situation.
That's it...so far.