31.3 > 45 .. should I tell her?

[SiobhanG]

I'm in a serious relationship currently, which I have serious doubts about and I'm fairly sure isn't going to work out in the long term and have started to develop feelings for someone else (yes I know...)..

A large part of me thinks they feel the same, but may not admit it due to my current situation, so I was seriously considering telling this other person how I felt today. This is what I asked:

"Should I tell her how I feel today?"

And I got back 31.3 changing to 45.

James DeKorne's Official Website - The Gnostic Book of Changes - Hexagram 31

Line 3 is all shameful, distress, regret, humiliated etc.

The thought of telling her though, and she freaks out leaving me feeling incredibly embarrassed, ashamed and regretting it isn't something I want to find out.

So, based on my interpretation I don't think telling her now is good, but ultimately pursuing her (in a less rash/addictive way) in general isn't such a bad idea? I really don't want to give up on her. I would say I'm seriously impressed at the accuracy of the reading, as it relates to my situation. Understanding it correctly though is another level entirely.

Curious on others thoughts on this.

 

[redoleander]

I would read this as a clear 'no'. This line is about following your impulses too much (I've read that this lines pretty explicitly refers to sexual impulses as well) and to not chase down every impulse. Probably opposite of what you'd like to receive as an answer but since it's so direct maybe it's a good opportunity to ask more questions like what is this attraction really about for you, what is the issue in your current relationship that's not being addressed, and so forth. This line by itself somewhat implies that following this doesn't get you what you want.

 

[rosada]

Not clear why you would want to tell her. Are you hoping she'll be open to having a secret affair? Or are you thinking you'd like to date her if she's interested in a relationship but you don't want to break off with your current girlfriend if she's not?
Either way 31.3 - 45 reads to me as if to say you are asking her to join you in a group experience and that it is not a good idea. Maybe a hint that you should first narrow down the "group" - call it off with the current girl friend - before pursuing your new interest.