54 to 51

[unicorn]

yes, the old relationship questions again. but with some seriously intense hexagrams this time.

background story: i am dating a guy who i live apart from...long distance relationship. we've been seeing each other for the past five months. we just went on an amazing camping trip to maine for labor day weekend. when we got back home, i told him that i loved him for the first time. he responded with silence. which i suppose is better then saying something you don't whole heartedly mean. all the same, i was a little taken aback. i was pretty sure he felt the same way...

so i threw the i ching asking the question "what is the true nature of X and my relationship." and it gave me hexagram 54.2 - the marrying of the maiden moving into hexagram 51 - shock. both are pretty strong cards. and i wont lie and say that they don't scare me. they scare me a lot.

i've read that sometimes when girls ask relationship questions and come up with hexagram 54.2, that it generally means there is another woman involved. and there is another woman that i feel threatened by. she is his ex of a three year relationship which ended due to her cheating multiple times. they have remained friends, and i know that it bothers him that i don't want anything to do with her. however, the other weekend at a wedding she confessed her "undying love for him." could it be that he's still in love with her? but that is a whole different question and i digress.

any words of advice/interpretation/warning for what is about to "shock" me would ease my already frazzled mind.

 

[dobro p]

so i threw the i ching asking the question "what is the true nature of X and my relationship." and it gave me hexagram 54.2 - the marrying of the maiden moving into hexagram 51 - shock. both are pretty strong cards. and i wont lie and say that they don't scare me. they scare me a lot.

i've read that sometimes when girls ask relationship questions and come up with hexagram 54.2, that it generally means there is another woman involved. and there is another woman that i feel threatened by. she is his ex of a three year relationship which ended due to her cheating multiple times. they have remained friends, and i know that it bothers him that i don't want anything to do with her. however, the other weekend at a wedding she confessed her "undying love for him." could it be that he's still in love with her? but that is a whole different question and i digress.

any words of advice/interpretation/warning for what is about to "shock" me would ease my already frazzled mind.

I don't see a lot of shock in 54.2. What I see in 54.2 is, first of all, the context of 54, which talks about being relatively powerless in a new situation. There's also the whole theme of marriage and mates and such, so that's really relevant to your situation. So overall, I'd say that your position in this relationship is relatively powerless, but that the relationship is really relevant to your needs right now. Second, 54.2 talks about seeing some, but not all, of what's going on in the situation, but that it's advantageous to carry out what you think to be right. So you don't have complete information about what's going on (this could refer to your having incomplete information about his feelings for you, or for the other woman, or something else completely), but the Yi says it's good to proceed according to your best judgement. The Yi *isn't* warning you away from the situation. And as for 54.2 meaning 'there's another woman involved' - well, I suppose I can see how it might mean that, but you know, it could just as easily mean he's trying to free himself from another woman, or it might mean there's stuff going on in your own unconscious that you're unaware of - it might be lots and lots of things other than a third party in the relationship.

Good luck with it. One thing for sure: now he knows how *you* feel, there's every chance you'll find out how *he* feels if he has any feelings for you at all. You know, when a guy has feelings for a woman, he WANTS her to know. I imagine this is the same for a woman. But how would I know lol?

 

[rosada]

54.2
One-eyed man who is able to see.
The perseverance of a solitary man furthers.

Seems to be mirroring back what you just experienced with you professing your love and getting silence in return. Wilhelm says this about the line (with a little editing):

"Here the situation is that of a girl {connected to} a man who has disappointed her. Man and {woman} ought to work together like a pair of eyes. Here the girl is left behind in loneliness; the man of her choice either has become unfaithful or {his enthusiasm} has died. But she does not lose her inner light of loyalty. Though the other eye is gone, she maintains her loyalty even in loneliness."

I see 51 in this case as the Shock you experienced when he did not return your sentiment.

Anyway, the I Ching seems to have exactly discribed The Moment and perhaps this means this incident sums up your whole relationship, that is, his lack of equal enthusiasm surprised and disappointed you, but it didn't shake your enthusiasm and you continue to be loyal - or at least to be interested. So the IC isn't telling you what you ought to do, just sort of spelling it out for you: You are loyal to a man who doesn't feel the same way you do and most likely this is ultimately going to feel lonely.

51.2 Does seem to offer some suggestion as to what to do for right now. I read it as encouraging you not to be concerned that your burst of affection was not returned. "You lose your treasures. Do not go in pursuit of them. After seven days you will get them back again." Sounds like it's saying you may be feeling you've lost your 'treasure' - your dignity? Anyway, seems to promise that if you do not make a big deal about it, in a few days things will mellow out and be back to how they were before you said anything..

 

[willowfox]

"asking the question "what is the true nature of X and my relationship." and it gave me hexagram 54.2 into hexagram 51"

Hex 54.2 this shows that you are not happy with X's non response and that has made you disappointed even though you wish to carry on with the relationship. But it does not say for you to give up, it says that you should just go on with the relationship as you have been doing.

Hex 51 suggests that you are due for a pleasant surprise.

 

[my_key]

Hex 54.2 this shows that you are not happy with X's non response and that has made you disappointed even though you wish to carry on with the relationship. But it does not say for you to give up, it says that you should just go on with the relationship as you have been doing.

Hex 51 suggests that you are due for a pleasant surprise.

Here's a slightly different take on the matter:
54.2 - Look at the situation from a different perspective. Don't over react to the way this guy has responded and things will come good.

There is a sense in 54 of not rocking the boat in the relationship. Maybe the 51 relates to the shock to your man and he's now taking a bit of time to get his head round things.
Being told you are loved can be pretty scary.

Hope this helps
Mike

 

[fkegan]

Allow me to offer some alternative perspectives upon your Yi oracle. First from the Gia-Fu Feng Taoist translation of the Yi for 54.2: ONE EYED MAN CAN SEE. FRUITFUL TO HAVE SOLITARY ZEST. Keep to yourself.
Line 2 of hex 54 can be corresponded to the degree 9Taurus in the Zodiac which has a Sabian Symbol (best known through Rudhyar's An Astrological Mandala) as
9 Taurus
A sleigh with all the suggestive warmth of the winter season speeds over ground on which the snow has yet to fall
and together the process symbolism becomes:
Imperfect vision combined with determined energy forges ahead making its own opportunity.
All of which would suggest the true nature of your relationship with X is not what you hope it to be.
Probably a good time to transition to asking the Yi about why you are so attracted to this person in a distant city who isn't showing as much interest in you as he does in the other woman in his life.
In general, whatever is going on with Mr. X your will probably find it more fruitful to have solitary zest, that is to be happy expressing your own essence in your life, than waiting for him to respond better.
Generally not the oracle one hopes for when asking a relationship question, but it can be useful if it can help you disengage from your relationship expectations of Mr. X.
Peace,
Frank

 

[hooo]

hmmm. wonder how this played out. hello, i came upon this site yesterday, after having consulted and received the same 54 (changing second line) to 51 in a Very Similar query, regarding a woman i met over 20 years ago, though the acquaintance was too brief. she's remained on my mind (obviously) but much more so than usual of late, as if part of the weather. the "mystery blonde" who's appeared in my dreams for quite a long time now moves closer, her features and "energy" clearer, and now, finally, her face: that of the woman about whom i consulted the oracle.

the to-the-heart-of-it "reply" has itself provided a bit of a shock.

at any rate, hello. this is a great branch on the tree of insight and information; i'm gonna take a good look around.

- hooo

 

[diamanda]

Line 54:2 shows a very solitary person.
Perhaps 51 is the shock this person feels when 'love' strikes again

 

[ginnie]

The thing is

The thing is that even though this relationship has been disappointing, it continues. In fact, the Yi urges you to keep it going. Maybe you do your best work when alone and your boyfriend is in another place. That could be good for both of you.