About love 42.1.3 > 53

[anatio]

My question was "What's stopping me from finding love? " 42.1.3 > 53
I've never been in a relationship with a man or loved a man and that's why this question arises.
Maybe it's not just the right time I don't know. I really don't make any effort to meet someone.

There's no answer about anything stopping me in the resulting hexagram, except line 3 it may be saying about some growing pains or transformation which I'm actually going trough.
Though the rest look positive to me.
Any insight appreciated.

hex 42
INCREASE. It furthers one
To undertake something.
It furthers one to cross the great water.

line 1​

It furthers one to accomplish great deeds.
Supreme good fortune. No blame.

line 3​

One is enriched through unfortunate events.
No blame, if you are sincere
And walk in the middle,
And report with a seal to the prince.

hex 53​

DEVELOPMENT. The maiden
Is given in marriage.
Good fortune.
Perseverance furthers.

 

[Matali]

Hello,
Indeed there is nothing that stops you : hexagram 42 "It is advantageous to undertake something. It is advantageous to cross the great waters", just like the council of line 1.
I think the I Ching's advice is to look into the matter and undertake because you will definitely meet the prince of line 3 "No blame if you are sincere, let you walk in the middle and make the prince a report with a seal"... This line 3 evokes indeed setbacks, everything will not be done in a day, just like the hexagram 53, step by step. Cool

 

[redoleander]

42.1.3 The willingness to love and lose and experience the full spectrum of what loving another person, or seeking a loving relationship, entails. It will take time, some will be great, some very disappointing. I think it’s encouraging in that it doesn’t really imply there’s a block, it just time to get out and try.

 

[psychonaut613]

53 step by step you will find someone to 42 increase you. I believe as you have never dated 53 means literally a step at a time, first meet some guys, then progress to dates, then kissing, then the touchy feely stuff and finally relationship, one foot in front of the other

 

[WanderingRaven]

Anatio,

I feel for you, having been similarly reticent in matters of love. A few things jumped out at me, as I was reading your post, that may be helpful.

You mentioned "I really don't make any effort to meet someone."

I went over to the DeKorne page for the hexagram, which provides different translations for the Yi. I've found that sometimes, one translation or another will contain part of a meaning, which, when combined, gives a more full understanding.

"

The Image​

Legge: Wind over thunder -- the image of Increase. When the superior man perceives good, he moves toward it; when he perceives his faults, he eliminates them.

Wilhelm/Baynes: Wind and thunder: the image of Increase. Thus the superior man: if he sees good, he imitates it; if he has faults, he rids himself of them."

This seems to be clear and good advice when it comes to romance: if you see a romantic opportunity that appeals to you, with someone who is compatible, pursue it, and take steps to make it possible. Likewise, if you notice a flaw in the way you are behaving, you can take action to change that behavior.

"Line 1 Blofeld: The time is favorable for undertaking great works -- sublime good fortune and no error!"

This reinforces that message of taking action to pursue romance.

"Line-3

Legge: The third line, magnetic, shows increase given to its subject by means of what is evil, so that she shall be led to good, and be without blame. Let her be sincere and pursue the path of the Mean, so shall she secure the recognition of the ruler, like an officer who announces herself to her prince by the symbol of her rank."

I see this as saying "you may make mistakes, or act in the wrong way, while pursuing a relationship. If this happens, be honest with the other person, admit your mistake, and you can learn from this and grow without guilt.

Hope this helps. May you find the love that is right for you

-WR

 

[marybluesky]

Hello,

42.1 sounds always like an advice to me: Now is a good time to start.

You have asked about what stops you, so I'd say: not starting a romance, not going through hard times, so stopping the gradual process.

 

[anatio]

After this initial reading about love I went on a date.
Everything felt so good, he was romantic and asked for a second date twice but I said not knowing. He didn't text after the date and got me thinking if it's because of me not knowing, maybe he changed his mind or it was tactful question to go after him I really don't know. I knew that he was not gonna text and it was kinda over.But I was in a position to keep wondering. Few days later I asked him how's he doing and hinted that I want to go on a second date but he didn't respond. I'm really curious and asked Yi to show me an image of what happened between me and him 26 unchanging.

 

[diamant]

an image of what happened between me and him 26 unchanging
He's a big, free-roaming animal.
Once he saw you weren't easy he was gone.

 

[redoleander]

26 UC sounds like not being compatible. Too much to navigate, for both of you. He is probably difficult and you were too ‘difficult’ for him in that his alluding to a second date in order to get more from you during the first one didn’t work. That’s good for you though. It’s good learning. People sometimes promise a lot in order to get what they want and don’t follow through. This sounds like a 42.3 experience; you can learn a lot from this to go on dates and enjoy yourself to the fullest, but not think much about the future until someone has shown you more clear behavior over time. For what it’s worth, it takes six months minimum to know what someone’s actually like for real. When you meet someone on a date, you meet their best representative! What else is there takes time to reveal. I’m sorry the date was disappointing but I’m really proud of you for going! You followed the advice of your reading and I think 53 resulting let you know it will take time. This is the type of practice that will get you someone better in the end.

I once read an entry about 26UC that said you might think someone mysterious but they’re actually just a terrible communicator, etc and I think that idea can apply here. Unavailability makes people seem much more appealing then they are and sometimes people work that to their advantage.