Asking the same Q few times - which one is valid?

[Mylife]

Hi everyone, I need some help understanding the “rule” about consulting the I Ching. Because I think I did an error and I m just getting crazy here for the past week or so.

I think I fall in the trap of asking the same Q many time at the same moment and not getting anywhere. I think I did it out of not quickly understanding the answer of the 1st and 2nd answer. Or due to doubts or anxiety.

I had a recent situation where I asked the 1st Q but I didn’t understand the answer entirely. However, after several days of reading, it seemed to be a good answer for my situation.

Then I asked the same Q again hoping to understand the answer better but I didn’t. I got lost even more. However, here again after few days of reading it seemed to be a good answer for my situation.

I asked the same Q 3rd time (hahaha crazy I know) and then I got an answer which seems to contradict the first 2 answers. Which means is not a positive answer for my situation.

All 3 answers can be applied as an answer to my situation but not sure anymore which one is the correct answer I should follow.

In your opinion which one is valid that I need to consider as an insight?

Perhaps everyone falls in this trap sometimes for various reasons. But what’s the oracle rule?
I hear that at some point the oracle will refuse to answer to you if you ask same thing several times.
But what doesn’t it mean by “refusing to answer”? You will still get an hexagram so that’s an answer.

I appreciate your help

 

[Mylife]

Also another tip I think I need is about “either or” questions.
Can we ask Q like “Shall I do either this or that?”

Or do you think is best that I ask one Q per each situation. One Q for “this” and one Q for “that”?

What do you advise is best for a Beginning like me?

Thank you

 

[Liselle]

First and foremost, I advise Hilary's Beginners' course, if you haven't taken it yet (it's free). Parts of it you already know, like how to cast a reading, but you could skim those sections to make sure you catch all the tidbits, and then spend more time on things you need help with, like "Choosing questions."

Once you're done with that, consider the Foundations course. This is much more detailed and in-depth. It's not free, but you can get it in different ways:

• Join Change Circle. Once you're a Change Circle member, Foundations (and many other materials) are included in the membership.
• Buy Foundations separately. (There are three options for that.)
• Sign up to be notified the next time Hilary teaches Foundations as a live class.

 

[Liselle]

Briefly about your questions, though:

• You should never ask an either/or question (and yes/no ones aren't great, either). Most of the time it'd be impossible to know which one Yi's answering. Ask one question at a time - what you said: 'One Q for “this” and one Q for “that”'
  
  
• There isn't a rule for how many questions you're "allowed" to ask, but I see your point.
  
  Ideally we should all ask one question, and work with it until we understand it. That is possible to do. Roll it around enough in your mind, spend enough time with it, and usually you'll start to understand. Or at the very least absorb it, so you can recognize it when things happen in real life. (Sometimes that's what a reading is - "Here's some advice for when this situation plays out." Of course you won't be able to understand it in a concrete way until it plays out.) Maybe "absorb" is a better word than "understand," sometimes.
  
  In practice, we're human and many of us get anxious and cast more readings when we don't understand the first one. (I am definitely part of "we." I've gotten better at not doing this as I've learned more, but it still happens.)
  
  The most important thing then is to realize readings are a conversation. Think about conversations with other people. If you ask a friend for advice and don't understand it, she won't just repeat the same thing. She'll try to explain, or compare it to something, or suggest you talk to someone else, or go off on a tangent, or advise you to sleep on it, or countless other things that happen in conversations. Similar things happen in readings, only it's more confusing because Yi doesn't speak normal language.
  
  You're right that sometimes Yi will stop cooperating. You'll still get a reading if you throw coins, but what it says might sound different in some way - for instance what you said about a 3rd reading contradicting the first two. Yi might have changed the subject and is suggesting you take a break, or some such. Remind yourself this might happen, keep it in mind.

 

[Trojina]

(As this is not a shared reading moved to Exploring Divination)

 

[Mylife]

Yes probably I should do the course and learn more

Ask one question at a time - what you said: 'One Q for “this” and one Q for “that”'

Thank you for confirming this.

The most important thing then is to realize readings are a conversation.

Very nice way to look at. Could be like a reading with a I Ching master. Very nice way to look at it. I like it

You're right that sometimes Yi will stop cooperating. You'll still get a reading if you throw coins, but what it says might sound different in some way - for instance what you said about a 3rd reading contradicting the first two. Yi might have changed the subject and is suggesting you take a break, or some such. Remind yourself this might happen, keep it in mind.

So basically if I ask 5 times and the 5th answer starts to feel different than the first ones could be that the I Ching is telling me to stop because it doesn’t want to cooperate anymore?!
For example 4 answers seems positive and the 5th is negative or not really linked to my Q.

I am trying to learn what would be the turning point when I should realise the I Ching is telling me to “backoff”

 

[Liselle]

So basically if I ask 5 times and the 5th answer starts to feel different than the first ones could be that the I Ching is telling me to stop because it doesn’t want to cooperate anymore?!
For example 4 answers seems positive and the 5th is negative or not really linked to my Q.

I am trying to learn what would be the turning point when I should realise the I Ching is telling me to “backoff”

I misspoke a little, sorry. It's not always, only, that Yi is telling you rudely to go away. It can do that, of course . But taking a break can be quite kindly advice. Something to break the cycle of agitation.

It doesn't always mean "stop" at all, rudely or kindly. But something has changed in the conversation; Yi has changed tack in some way. Yi may have spent 4 readings re-stating the advice or the explanation, but if that isn't working it might stop answering the question directly and try something else. What exactly that is will depend on what the different-sounding reading actually says.

I think what might make sense is:

• First step: notice and acknowledge that something feels different. Pause.
• Remind yourself this is probably not Yi contradicting itself. It might not be answering your question directly anymore.
• Look at the different-sounding reading with that in mind. "Alright, this might not literally be an answer to my question. What else could it mean? What does it say by itself? Where might the conversation have gone?"

It's impossible to be definite about any of this. Yi is pretty infinitely malleable. We can't make a flowchart.

I think the important thing is try not to panic when you don't understand what's going on. That's really hard to do if you have an urgent problem. But at the very least, try to realize that panic and its cousins won't help you anyway. (Have you ever found that panic helps? I'd guess not.)

This is embarrassing, but there have been times I've done readings after readings (in a panic), and only stopped because I was exhausted. Oftentimes then little whispers would show up in my head; I'd remember little bits of the readings. Pay attention to those - go write them down. Don't necessarily dive back into the readings right that second, just let the whispers accumulate. When you feel more settled or less tired, then go back to the readings, especially the first ones and the ones with the whispers. Things will often start to make more sense. Rinse, repeat.