Compassion and Hexagram 29 UC

[Seeker0970]

Hello All,

I am learning so much reading these postings on this site.

My question to the Yi is, "How can I develop compassion for other people to the point where I'm coming from love and understanding?"

Answer: 29 unchanging, Repeating Chasms

I don't mean it in the romantic sense; I mean it in the dispassionate, detached sense. The query is in relation to two or three nasty coworkers whom I can't really avoid who say underhanded, mean things to me sometimes to get a reaction. (I know. I sound like such a victim, but I'm really being challenged in the interpersonal skills department here lately!)

My interpretation of this reading is that this is an unpleasant experience I will have to go through again and again to "get." I've been sober for almost six months, so the emotional side of things is coming back to life.

Any thoughts? I seem to be getting a lot of UC casts, including 29, which comes up often. Thanks.

 

[steve]

This means i believe that this is a huge challenge and not easy, sometimes a very bad experience, work place bullying is a very bad situation, i have experienced myself. I had friend recently that recieved 20 000 dollars in compensation for a situation that was happening. You are going to need every skill you have, I would be talking to management and getting it sorted maybe. Its a really hard issue though, I would be telling them ( depending on where you work) that they need to stop this or you will be filing complaint, this will then tell them that their jobs could be in hanging in the balance, hitting someone in the pocket can be a pretty strong signal.

I jsut replied to someone else in relation to hex 29, I think of it as being in underground caves and you are trying weave to the surface with out drowning in a lake or falling down a chasm so you need to be very careful as you are saying you are battling your own personal demons, which i know of the ones you are dealing with, they are very powerful. Yes your emotions are very high as drugs and alchohol mask them. However this doesnt mean you need to accept how these clowns are acting. You dont need to show comapssion for them, they could be in fact challenging your sobriety, so be careful thats why the Yi is yelling at you do something, dont fool yourself with the situation

Steve

In general you really need to work this out as this is putting you in a dark place.

 

[Seeker0970]

Hi Steve, thank you so much for this interpretation. I believe you are right in your take that this is challenging my sobriety in fact a couple of times that has been the target of the backhanded remarks. A lot of awareness comes to the surface after quitting drink--along with a lot of feelings. Previously I allowed people to take me through the paces because I felt I didn't deserve respect because I was not respecting myself. Now I'm faced with seeing the real them, and they aren't nice people, along with the very challenging chasms I fall into emotionally. I really appreciate your strong warning as well. I think for starters I will in fact disassociate myself from them as they don't really seem to be the ilk I want to surround myself with. Management in fact is also part of this lot I am describing; they're the types who feign cordiality when they're really just trying to get a spike in. I work with many emotionally immature, power hungry, passive aggressive people. However I also work with some who are either neutral or very positive. So really I need compassion for myself and need to protect myself! Thanks again. I value your insight very much.

 

[steve]

Well if management is involved thats worse, not sure what country your in, but you need to sort this out, I know what I would be doing.

Maybe you could ask some more questions as the situation sounds complex.

Steve

 

[Seeker0970]

Next question

I'm in the US.

I think my best defense now is indeed to stand up for myself yet in small ways. I asked for further insight into my best course of action and received 15 unchanging. I interpret this to mean acting in line with higher principles such as truth, so that when these or other denigrating comments are made, I take corrective action toward that person in the moment. The shift here is that I've abided other people's comments and now I don't. If I'm seeing this wrong, please provide input. I get this hexagram a lot in this situation, along with 36!

 

[Seeker0970]

Update.

The repeating nature of this experience of 29 with my coworkers finally revealed to me that I was caught up in a dysfunctional dynamic that I had been blind to -- until after so many repetitions of going through the same pain, I got it. These people are poisonous and unhappy. It wasn't anything I was doing or seeing wrong, except that I was accepting the maltreatment. Because I got this 29 as unchanging, the confusion didn't last long. I doubt I will be bothered by them again. I was taking it personally when it wasn't about anything but a sick dynamic. I've cut them off as much as possible.

 

[Seeker0970]

Further update as things here continue to clarify. I only stayed in the 29 space for as long as I still identified with being at the mercy of these people's manipulations. It took a lot of overcoming fear and a lot of guts to break away from that identification. Turns out that I'm just not the person I used to be and the pain was coming from the realization that I couldn't deal with still being seen as that old person. I've gotten so much from reading things on this forum that have helped me with numerous situations like this lately. Thanks all.