Do I really love this man?

[erre_kz]

I asked this question because I am very confused and I cannot understand if what I feel is an authentic feeling or if instead it is a feeling amplified by an idealization and by my "love for love itself". I think the answer is a mix of the two components, however I wanted to have a look inside myself ..

38.1.2.3.5.6> 31 was the answer.
Yi's answer makes me think that there is indeed a contrast within me, that I read my feelings in a certain way but then I realize that perhaps the correct way to read them is another, and vice versa from scratch. And certainly 31 makes me think that I am attracted to this person who exerts an influence on me, but above all on a mental level, 31 gives me the idea of ​​that component of idealization that is a source of attraction, inspiration, etc. ..

 

[Freedda]

erre_kz:

First, I'll say, who am I to give you relationship advice? I mean ... really, but since you've asked, I'd suggest to take it as advice only from a distant source, and not as the gospel. That said ...

One school of Yi understanding/interpretation looks at the moving lines as representing places where things are perhaps exaggerate, lit-up, overblown ...

So here, you have five moving lines (1.2.3.5.6), and given that, I think, hmmm, you have an awful lot of things going on here, maybe too many irons in the fire or balls being juggled. So, yes, there might be a call for caution ....

Some names for this hexagram are 'Estrangement' and 'Not Acting as One' - when I look at the two 3-line figures that make up this hexagram, you have trigram Fire above, and the trigram Lake below: so they are moving in different directions (fire upwards; lake down) so they are distant or feel estranged from one another.

With the moving lines the clarity of Fire could now seem too bright and hot, (like romance often feels, at least at the beginning), and perhaps it's blinding you to what might really be going on?

The moving lines of Lake could mean that it's usual sense of Joy has become more of an obsession, and co-dependence instead of an inter-dependence.
But it's perhaps not that uncommon for us to feel these things at the start of an intense relationship, but we often have to get to a place that moves beyond blinding passion and sensual addiction to a place of - and here's where the related hexagram 31 comes in - a place of Reciprocity, perhaps to a place that is more heartfelt.

Relationships start in all sorts of different and odd ways - sometimes with seemingly miss-matched people and under less than ideal circumstances, but that in itself does not mean things will end badly.

So, perhaps the advice here is to look for this reciprocity, this give-and-take, to see what's there: is there mutual kindness perhaps, or respect, or interest (all of which can be present alongside hot, burnin' love). And also to consider, do you have a sense of joy or happiness even in the less-intense moments (perhaps the joy that comes from a still heart)? These all might tell you alot of what the potential is here.

And of course, being a minor-league Yi-ster, I'd appreicate any feedback - if this was good or bad advice, or how things worked out.

Best, D.

 

[heatwave]

I don't know if this is helpful because I've never had this exact reading, but I've recorded having received hexagram 38 in my journal literally only in regards to men and relationship questions. I've never had so many moving lines, but basically there were irreconcilable differences between me and each of them.

I've asked the question in various ways at various times with various people, but ultimately the takeaway I have gotten from it is don't force anything and feelings aren't facts. Allow things to unfold naturally without going down an emotional rabbit hole. In my experience, our paths have always diverged for the best.

As far as 31 goes, I've received this about my intuition being right, almost predictive. I think if I'd gotten this reading I would have read it as my intuition is telling me we are "mutually aliened."

Again, no idea if this is helpful at all but thought I'd share some personal experiences with 38.

 

[rosada]

Play it as a brother-sister relationship and see how it opens up.

38.1.2
You feel very comfortable being yourselves around each other. You come and go as you please and say what's on your mind.
38.3.5
Old karmic patterns may come up. Be aware of not responding in ways that recreate family dramas.
38.6
If you can avoid projecting too many fears and fantasies on him I think you'll come to recognize a true kindred spirit.

 

[marybluesky]

Hello erre_kz!

What an interesting question! Before going to the cast, I want to discuss it a bit. I think we never can say for sure if we love someone for themselves or just project a need, a thirst: it's a fusion. A projection that is too much based on illusion leads to disappointment; however even the most selfless, descended loves won't form if nothing inside us "colors" the reality.

Do I really love this man?38.1.2.3.5.6> 31

He's been an Stranger, or you were feeling like a Stranger(38), then you met and now are Attracted (31) to him.
38.1 talks about lost horse and hateful people- how did you feel in your fist meeting? Had you just lost a love interest? Or been among people you didn't like?
In 38.2 you meet a master in a narrow street- despite the less than ideal conditions this man brings something precious into your life.
38.3 indicates a difficult situation that finishes well.
Initial troubles are left behind in 38.5 and people get intimate.
38.6 is about one who doesn't trust the suitor at first, then he does, and good fortune furthers.

If I am to read the only unchanging line- which is a method when five lines of first hexagram change: "Liu: Isolated owing to opposition, he meets a strong man and they associate sincerely. Even though there is danger, no blame. "

Your hesitation, then attraction is depicted in the cast anyway we read it. Do you really love that man? I don't know how you define the love, but great things are ahead after trusting your feelings for this attractive stranger.

Good Luck!

 

[rosada]

I thought Opposition was a description of two siblings. How do you get "stranger" from 38?

 

[marybluesky]

I thought Opposition was a description of two siblings. How do you get "stranger" from 38?

Because of its name: estrangement, alienation.

 

[Trojina]

I thought Opposition was a description of two siblings. How do you get "stranger" from 38?

38 is not a description of 2 siblings, where did you get that from ?

 

[Trojina]

Li and Dui possibly, the daughter trigrams ?

 

[rosada]

Hilary: "With an inner state of Opposing, you contain mutually contradictory impulses - like two siblings under one roof."

Wilhelm: "This hexagram is composed of the trigrams Li above, flame, which burns upward, and Tui below, the lake, which seeps downward. These two movements are in direct contrast. furthermore, Li is the second daughter and Tui the youngest daughter, and although they live in the same house they belong to different men; hence their wills are not the same but are divergently directed."

 

[erre_kz]

I want to thank you all for your help in understanding my reading and for your inputs.
Some time passed, and I think today I have a sincere feeling of affection for this man, I can't help to feel it. But at the same time I feel estranged from him, as indicated by 38. I feel that he doesn't and can't understand me, and sure I can't understand him. I feel we are similar in some respects, but we are opposite at the same time, and not complementary because there's always this feeling of not understanding each other, lots of quarrels and hurts, even if involuntary.
So I decided to cut the bond.