First time post here.

[Hannah236]

Dear Members

I've been a lurker for a long time and have gained so much from everyone on this site.

I am in a very difficult situation and am thinking of taking time out from my marriage, to give myself space to think and to see if staying with this man is what I want for the rest of my life.

I have been thinking about this for a few years now so it is not a snap decision. I've finally set the wheels in motion and I then asked the i-ching for its opinion. I got hexagram 63 lines 3 and 5 changing to Hexagram 24. This is the second time I've received 63 with regards to this topic. I feel this is a positive reading, but I would be grateful if more experienced members could confirm. I'm a little confused by line 3.

With grateful thanks in advance for your time. :bows:

 

[Tim K]

Looking at the text of 63, Legge:
Intimates progress and success in small matters.
There will be advantage in being firm and correct.
There has been good fortune in the beginning; there may be disorder in the end.

I think that it refers to the state of your marriage, the growing separation between you two.
h24 speaks of that 'space and freedom' you mention. So basically Yi confirms your feelings about all this, that it will give you some freedom back, time to think, being on your own, with line 3 just showing that you've thought about it for '3 years' literally, and you are tired.

At line 3 you are facing the water/river/difficulties ahead, and by line 5 - the middle of the crisis - I think you will get the salvation you need.
.5 hints that it won't take you a long time to sort this out, no need to burn the bridges and go all the way.
Try something simple and easy - short trip/vacation maybe .. visit your parents/relatives - just an idea.

 

[rosada]

Hello Hannah and welcome!

I think the IC is encouraging you that a trial separation could be very useful in helping you get back on track (24) with your life.
63.3 Reads like there are some real issues that aren't going to go away unless you deal with them.
63.5 Makes me think the problems are not insurmountable, that some small sincere effort could make a big difference.

 

[Hannah236]

Thank you so very much Ashteroid and Rosada for your insight - I am going to act on it and maybe not go away for so long, just long enough to get some objectivity. A million thanks. I feel much better now. Thank you, thank you. :bows:

 

[peter2610]

A book which I have used many times in examining thought processes and psychological dynamics is The Taoist I Ching by Liu I Ming. The book is devoted almost entirely to the understanding of each hexagram in terms of its psychological structure and I have found it to be unerringly accurate.
Hex 63, Settled, is primarily concerned with the preservation of settlement and the forestalling of dangerous unsettling. The settled mind is seen as a mind possessing strength and clarity, an unsettled mind is seen as weak and unclear. In the West we pursue unsettled searching with an almost religious zeal, always imagining that happiness lies just beyond the next horizon. In Eastern religions it is acknowledged that peace and fulfilment emerge from a settled mind/lifestyle and the preservation of a settled mind is recognised as having paramount importance.
In his introduction to Hex.63 Ming includes the following passage: "Forestalling danger involves being careful outwardly, not acting in any way that would be improper, not doing anything that would be unjust, living according to one's basic state and not wishing for anything else. Once one can nurture illumination inwardly, one can also ward off danger outwardly.”
Ming is arguing that when in a settled state the danger one faces lies in not taking care regarding the intrusion of external influences, if one can become aware that peace and fulfilment are governed by internal balance one can “nurture illumination inwardly” and develop a robust defence against unsettling influences.

3rd yang: The Emperor attacks the Barbarians and conquers them after three years. Do not employ inferior people.
The Barbarians are the intrusive thoughts and desires that torment your inner peace and balanced awareness, producing an unsettled mind. Three years indicates a gradual process in making your settlement robust but be careful, “Do not employ inferior people” - what you are seeking is a balanced inner Peace, not an impenetrable fortress.

5th yang: Slaughtering an ox in the neighbourhood to the east is not as good as the ceremony in the neighbourhood to the west, really receiving the blessing.
Once the mind is calmly settled careful observation must be maintained in order to obviate any emerging thoughts on this issue (the neighbourhood to the East - yang). In guarding the mind against any such intrusive thoughts you are protecting your nurturing yin qualities (neighbourhood to the West - yin). “By emptiness one can be fulfilled.” - Ming

Resultant hexagram - Hex 24 Return - Return, turn back from your intended course.

Parallel Nuclear Progression: (64,2,4,6 -2) - Persevere and discipline the Devil’s Country.