Hexagram 31.1.3.6 changing to 25 in a neglectful (?) relationship

[curiousdiviner]

Hi, I was feeling strong sense of neglect by my boyfriend and drew this combination but the info about romantic partnerships and these hexagrams seems to be conflicting. Some of them are basically saying just step out and see what happens, some people are suggesting turn the relationship into a childlike joy etc. and I am confused. Also does 31 changing to 25 basically mean, I should basically change 31 to 25 in my own life or is this basically a portrayal of the situation? I am very confused.

 

[Trojina]

It's no use just saying 31>25 without saying what the change lines are as they figure in your answer.

It is 31.1.3.6>25

It also isn't clear what your question is? Are you asking about staying or leaving or what?

There is no fixed meaning in any answer it will fit your question and as you haven't told us your question I can't see how to apply the answer.

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[curiousdiviner]

It's no use just saying 31>25 without saying what the change lines are as they figure in your answer.

It is 31.1.3.6>25

It also isn't clear what your question is? Are you asking about staying or leaving or what?

There is no fixed meaning in any answer it will fit your question and as you haven't told us your question I can't see how to apply the answer.

Tips on how to post a reading below

How to get the most from sharing a reading

There are some lovely people here who'll help you understand your reading. Here's how you can make it easier for them to help you: Share... some background and context for your reading - enough for people to understand what it's about. the question you asked, word for word. the answer Yi gave...

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Hello dear Trojina,

thank you for your reply. I asled what should be my course of action in this relationship.

 

[Trojina]

Overall it seems to me there's a strong suggestion you re-find your own emotional independence. If you look at the translations, what the I Ching actually says (not commentaries from various websites) you have 31, Mutual Influence/Attraction, the way people impact on one another and receive one another. We are all pushed and pulled about by our interactions with others whether romantic or not and we have to make a balance between being receptive to them and becoming their puppet or becoming lost because our whole world gravitates around them. You've gone into too much dependence in line 3. You're holding on for dear life and you may be feeling very driven by the need to stay connected. This line also has a strong sexual component, the gripping is done with the thighs and so this attachment has sort of gone beyond your conscious control, it's like being hooked on a drug.

Because of this I think any intentions or declarations you make about leaving or moving on are just words, they don't go very deep (31.6) Also line 1 shows your intentions to break free aren't very strong (31.1).

I'm seeing the 25 here as you not really recognising how caught up you've gotten. 25 can be an innocence, a lack of intent, an ability to go with the flow without overthinking. In this cast there's probably a number of ways to see the 25 in this context. One could see it simply as a disentanglement from all that heavy stuff in 31 but I think I see it as you being almost too disengaged from the recognition that you're actually somewhat emotionally enslaved here. It just feels like you could say all sorts of things about what you're going to do but you're quite hooked on this guy but in a way that is now bad for you. You need to work towards letting go a bit, remembering the days where you felt fine before you even knew him, when it didn't matter to you if he was nice to you or not. You probably felt a lot freer then. That's your direction I think, you need to go in the direction of feeling okay with your life whatever he's up to. That might involve leaving him or it might involve you just making some changes, noticing your well being has become way too dependent on his behaviour.


I don't think you can let this drift and take it as it comes (25) any more. I think you need to exercise your will power with the feelings you have in this relationship, like you would with cakes or cigarettes or alcohol. It's not healthy for you how it is now. Change patterns are 22 and 47 - you don't need to consider these but for me it's an added layer pointing to the fact you need to go a bit deeper into your self and ask yourself questions about what's happened to you here rather than live each day as it comes without looking too deeply.

 

[my_key]

Hi curiousdiviner

31 <> 25
Your best course of action would be to steer a path of Mutual Influence (31) through engaging in all aspects of the relationship Without Falsehood (25).

Good Luck