Hexagram 4.2.5.6>8 in regards to love

[lalaluna]

Hi all,

I recently asked the Yi Jing if my romantic interest has reciprocal feelings of love for me and received hexagrams 4>8, with lines 2, 5, and 6 changing.

A bit of background:

He's currently in between jobs and places, working on himself and healing from some emotional trauma from his past.

Recently I have been forthright about my feelings for him, open and honest about my hopes and intentions, and patient and nurturing with him as he navigates this phase of life.

He has been hot and cold--seemingly happy to accept my love when he needs it but unable to affirm or return the same love for me on a consistent basis.

We've been in a cycle of pulling each other in then pushing each other away.

I'm not sure what to make of the push and pull dynamic.

Is he using my feelings to benefit his needs for intimacy, or does he actually have reciprocal feelings of love that he isn't yet ready to acknowledge due to personal baggage we're both working through?

Just looking for outside insight and clarity from those of you more well versed in the ways of the Yi Jing than this girl

 

[Liselle]

"Reciprocal feelings of love" could be hexagram 8, I think. Someone who Doesn't Know is Seeking Union.

Lines 2 and 5 seem to endorse being patient with the young learner who's trying to work things out. Yi seems to agree with what you've been doing.

Line 6 - don't know about this one. Maybe try to find some middle ground? Don't strike out at his behavior, but don't be a doormat, either. No idea how that might work out practically.

 

[Liselle]

Maybe there's a way to lessen the push and pull in some sort-of more passive way. Line 6 sort of seems like that, maybe. "No harvest in acting like an outlaw, Harvest in resisting outlawry."

Resistance without acting in kind, or something. Reminds me of dampening vibrations. You can't do it by trying to pull or push in the opposite direction, that would be impossible. But if you just hold your hand there it stops.

Again no idea how to apply that. It might be the wrong idea altogether.

 

[The Hermit]

This reading

Hi all,

I recently asked the Yi Jing if my romantic interest has reciprocal feelings of love for me and received hexagrams 4>8, with lines 2, 5, and 6 changing.

A bit of background:

He's currently in between jobs and places, working on himself and healing from some emotional trauma from his past.

Recently I have been forthright about my feelings for him, open and honest about my hopes and intentions, and patient and nurturing with him as he navigates this phase of life.

He has been hot and cold--seemingly happy to accept my love when he needs it but unable to affirm or return the same love for me on a consistent basis.

We've been in a cycle of pulling each other in then pushing each other away.

I'm not sure what to make of the push and pull dynamic.

Is he using my feelings to benefit his needs for intimacy, or does he actually have reciprocal feelings of love that he isn't yet ready to acknowledge due to personal baggage we're both working through?

Just looking for outside insight and clarity from those of you more well versed in the ways of the Yi Jing than this girl

Must be difficult to let go of the hot/cold treatment, so much certainty hidden there. If somebody would treat me like that, I would focus and identify my own parental figure who probably taught me to accept such hell and then reinforce my boundaries.

 

[my_key]

I recently asked the Yi Jing if my romantic interest has reciprocal feelings of love for me and received hexagrams 4>8, with lines 2, 5, and 6 changing.

Hi lalaluna

4: 2.5.6 <> 8

8 (Seeking Union) imagines the situation with respect to your partners feelings as if she is walking towards a new place of kinship following a change of perspective. You are similarly enwrapped in this too.

4 (Childhood) advocates that people do their very best to walk their talk even though there may be a lack of emotional maturity preventing them from doing so. Repeating behaviours over and over out of ignorance does not bring you a satisfactory answer.

4.2 - By all means walk towards her with an open heart, showing her your flexibility, however there may well be aspects of hers and your behaviours that need to be strongly addressed or even to be stripped away completely.

4.5 - Accepting the benefits that come from a humble dispersion of that which is not working it may well lead to you both seeing things differently.

4.6 - It is vital for the relationship that old negative behaviours and mental processes are wisely addressed. There has to be give and take and a renegotiation of how you both act within the relationship. Both of you acting out your old dramas will not bode well.

... or it might mean something completely different for you.

Good Luck