Hexagram 49.3 > 17 Should I continue with this Forgiveness Prayer?

[Skywatcher]

Hello forum!

I recently found a prayer of forgiveness on Youtube (it's not Ho'oponopono) and saw all the positive comments about it.

I've been doing it since November and I should do it for 90 days.
I've been going through a mental transformation this year and I've come to understand a lot of things I've been experiencing.
I don't want to expose myself, but in short, I understood that a lot of things that happened in my life are not my fault or my parents', but I don't want to depend on them financially anymore and I don't want them to depend on me emotionally anymore.
So I came across this prayer and decided to do it, and my goal is to heal and then, I could find a job (I don't want to work homeoffice due to my health anymore). But after a month I feel that living with my parents is more and more difficult.
I still totally depend on them financially and this is a bad situation as I live with them.
So I asked myself if this prayer is really doing me good.

I asked the I Ching if should continue, if this is good to me, and I got Hex 49.3 > 17.

Hexagram 49, Radical Change

How can you break the mould?
How must the form change to express the essence?

Oracle
'Radical change.
On your own day, there is truth and confidence.
From the source, creating success, constancy bears fruit.
Regrets vanish.'

Changing Lines
Line 3
'Setting out to bring order means a pitfall,
Constancy means danger.
As words of radical change draw near three times,
There is truth and confidence.'

Hexagram 17, Following

How are things flowing, and how can you move with them?
Where are you being nudged and guided?

I think the Hexagram 49 is pretty good.... but not the third line!
The Legge translation says:

The third line, undivided, shows that action taken by its subject will be evil. Though he be firm and correct, his position is perilous. If the change he contemplates have been three time fully discussed, he will be believed in.

I think is curious that says "three times" because the prayer must be done in 3 months.
But I think the Line 3 is not encouraging me to continue. My interpretation is that I am not ready for a change.

Does anybody have some experience about this hex?

Any insight is appreciated!

 

[rosada]

49. Revolution gives guidance for making changes, particularly changes that allow you to be more true to yourself. Line 3 is always a crucial line as it describes the difficult meeting of the inner world and the outer world - particularly situations where our higher self would like to have things heavenly and happy but the lower self has to live life on earth with harsh reality. So when it comes to making changes line three points out the conflict of making changes versus staying with the old ways, and recommends negotiating to arrive at a workable solution.

49.3
STARTING BRINGS MISFORTUNE
You would like to not have to be dependent on your folks but you realize you’re not in a position to just head out on your own.
PERSEVERANCE BRINGS DANGER.
Yet you know it’s also not good to just continue enduring with things as they are.
WHEN TALK OF REVOLUTION HAS GONE AROUND THREE TIMES ONE MAY COMMIT HIMSELF AND MEN WILL BELIEVE HIM.
Therefore the IC is recommending discussing goals and it seems that when you’ve done this several times the parents will come to recognize your sincerity and you will be able to come up with a way of being that all can 17. Follow along with. (I’m assuming this line is saying discuss with your folks, although perhaps it means think things through carefully on your own until you come up with a workable plan.)

So I’m not seeing these hexagrams as commenting on whether you should or should not continue the prayer but maybe more like telling you how this prayer is helping clear your mind so you can have these important conversations with your folks without a lot of emotional baggage from the past. When you have been able to forgive the past it’s possible to move forward into a new future.
===

It also occurs to me that you were assuming you would see some changes and improvement by now but maybe nothing changes until you complete the full 3 months. Meanwhile I don’t see anything here that would say you ought not do the prayers. Perhaps you would get value from asking the IC “What effect should I expect from doing this prayer for 3 months?”

 

[Trojina]

This sounds like something you really do need help with, it's a painful situation

a lot of things that happened in my life are not my fault or my parents', but I don't want to depend on them financially anymore and I don't want them to depend on me emotionally anymore.

But to answer your question...I see you have used Hilary's translation but Legge's commentary. Legge's commentary is a little misleading here with talk of 'evil' IMO and if you are using Hilary's translation her commentary would be better to go by than his.

Translation =actual words of Yi. Commentary=someone's ideas about it.

Hilary's translation

Line 3
'Setting out to bring order means a pitfall,
Constancy means danger.
As words of radical change draw near three times,
There is truth and confidence.'

I think we have to take this answer literally don't we with the 'words of radical change' these words for you here is the prayer of forgiveness you found on Youtube. This isn't a radical change that happens overnight, the words need time to go round but as you pointed out

I think is curious that says "three times" because the prayer must be done in 3 months.
But I think the Line 3 is not encouraging me to continue. My interpretation is that I am not ready for a change.

I think it is relevant that the line mentions '3 times' and the time for the prayer is 3 months and I do absolutely think it is telling you to continue, literally. When it says 'setting out to bring order, pitfall' it means if you try to soon to implement changes before the need for change has been fully absorbed and integrated by you (and those around you) then it won't work. But if you keep on going towards your goal letting these prayer words go around for the three months then 'truth and confidence' appears.

Also bear in mind this line can be literal in actually discussing things three times (or more) with others. If you want to make a change in your circumstances for example and your parents or others aren't hearing you or aren't on board it takes time and several times of raising issues before they see you're right.

So with this line

Don't expect immediate changes to come about from this prayer
Don't try to put your world right quite yet your time will come
Keep on praying using the Youtube prayer and/or other prayers which can be as direct as you like.

You might get tired of it always being about forgiveness when you actually want your freedom and independence so I'd suggest praying for those too.


Prayer is a direct communication with God which doesn't rely on formula or a technique in which there's a knack to getting 'results'. However there are different kinds of prayers I guess, different ways of approach yet still ultimately direct communication and understanding and response is surely what you want. Apart from the youtube prayer you might simply open up and asking for what you need help with and watch for how that help or solution reveals itself. It's not a question of such prayer as that 'working' or 'not working' because it's not like a spell.


Also as a side note as this line is so often about actual discussion or letting people know your intention you could perhaps notice openings for letting your family know what you want/intend to do if that's possible which it may not be. In general 49.3 is very good for making changes it's just they do need to be thoroughly thought through and prepared for. The warning in the line is if you try to make changes before you are ready it won't work. The prayer you are using is making you ready I imagine. I don't think this answer is telling you to stop - unless you don't like doing it in which case you could try prayer a different way maybe.

 

[my_key]

I asked the I Ching if should continue, if this is good to me, and I got Hex 49.3 > 17.

In my experience anything that moves us towards forgiveness of self or others is a good practice to embrace. However, don't expect the ride to be a smooth one, a consistent one, a short one.

17 wraps the situation around your question up in an essence of naturalness and attraction. Almost like it is inevitable that you would at some point walk this shadowy path, and now is the right time to do this. It is beneficial to paint this new picture, but not in a regimented colour by numbers fashion.

49 advocates that best practice when you are embracing radical change is to keep an eye on what is happening inside and outside you and to regulate your usage accordingly. Remain flexible.There might be seasons within the 90 day season. The overall season of 90 days may not be best suited for you, so again regulate the frequency or length of your practice or even stop for short periods. You will know what is right for you as your journey progresses. Remember the path to forgiveness doesn't have to be a race nor a track to be rushed along.

49.3: is a call to you to walk steadfastly along this threshold stay with what comes up for you, rather than look to step over it too soon. You may be tempted to overstep a mark into a land of chastising yourself or others rather than fully embracing the emotional roller coaster or hearing out the 'voices of the past' that inhabit your inner world. Be aware of this and guard against it as much as you can.

 

[Skywatcher]

Dear Rosada, Trojina and My key,

Thank you so much for stopping by and leaving these deepful insights! It means a lot to me.
I have been meditating on each answer.

But to answer your question...I see you have used Hilary's translation but Legge's commentary. Legge's commentary is a little misleading here with talk of 'evil' IMO and if you are using Hilary's translation her commentary would be better to go by than his.

Translation =actual words of Yi. Commentary=someone's ideas about it.

Thank you for make it clear!

I believe this is a deep change that cannot happen overnight. I'm trying to respect the necessary time while not being stagnant.
There are several stages and I'm trying to embrace each one with love and patience.
I'm REALLY impressed how I Ching is talking to me.

I followed Rosada's advice and asked the question, "What effect should I expect from doing this prayer for 3 months?"
I got HEX 11.3.6 > 41.

The Hillary's translation:

Hexagram 11, Flow
How will you work with this extraordinary potential?
How can you channel the flow of energy to create harmony?
Changing Lines
Line 3
'There is no level ground without a slope,
No going out without a return.
Constancy in hardship is no mistake.
Do not sorrow about its truth.
In eating and drinking there is blessing.'

Line 6
'The bulwarks fall back into the moat – don't use the army.
From your own city, declaring the mandate.
Constancy means shame.'

Hexagram 41, Decreasing
Why do you want to make such an offering?
How much is truly asked of you?
Could this be simpler?
'Decreasing: there is truth and confidence.
From the source, good fortune.
Not a mistake, there can be constancy.
Fruitful to have a direction to go.
How to use this?
Two simple baskets may be used for the offering.'

The early Chinese character for 'Decreasing' shows a hand with a vessel: decreasing, you pour out what you have in offering. You focus your faith and hope on something higher than your everyday life, and sacrifice lower things to this. When you do so with an undivided heart, it opens the flow of good fortune, and your life becomes lighter and simpler.

There is no obligation here. I'll let things flow. And if necessary, I'll take breaks, as my_key said.

The overall season of 90 days may not be best suited for you, so again regulate the frequency or length of your practice or even stop for short periods.

Thank you so much!

 

[Skywatcher]

An update on this topic after I finished the 3 month period.

It was impressive how this cast (49.3 > 17) described my situation. After the prayer I felt as if my entire internal structure had fallen apart and now I am trying to create a new one, brick by brick to start a new phase of my life.

There was a huge internal shift, and painful at first, in my way of thinking about everything. I was suddenly able to understand things that I couldn't be able to before.
I skipped a few days of prayer when I thought it was necessary, I did meditation and read self-help books, but I still had positive results

 

[rosada]

Do you feel to share what the prayer was?

 

[Skywatcher]

Hi, Rosada!
Sure! But I have to translate it because is not originally in English, so please disregard the spelling errors

The author name is "Cristina Cairo". Here is it:

This prayer of forgiveness must be said for your biological parents even if you didn't know them, because our unconscious "blames" those who brought us to Earth.
You must pray a day for your father and the other day for your mother. Saying: "Father who brought me to life..." or "Mother who brought me to life..." because your unconscious carries the "natal memory" of the time of pregnancy and will produce deep forgiveness. It's important to say this prayer even if you think you have nothing to forgive. Know that if you are sick, without prosperity, unhappy in love or attract unpleasant situations, it is a consequence in the roots (parents) in your heart. We don't always remember what made us suffer in childhood, but the unconscious knows.

PRAYER

I forgive you, please forgive me.
You were never to blame.
I was never to blame either.
I forgive you, forgive me, please.
Life teaches us through discord...
and I learned to love you and let you go from my mind.
You need to live your lessons and so do I.
I forgive you... forgive me in the name of God.
Now, go be happy, so I can be happy too.
May God protect you and forgive our worlds.
The sorrows disappeared from my heart and there is only Light and Peace in my life.
I want you happy, smiling, wherever you are...
It's so good to let go, stop resisting, and let new feelings flow!
I forgave you from the bottom of my soul, because I know you never did anything wrong, but because you believed it was the best way to be happy...
Forgive me for having harbored hatred and hurt for so long in my heart. I didn't know how good it felt to forgive and let go; I didn't know how good it felt to let go of what never belonged to me.
Now I know that we can only be happy when we let life go so that we can follow our dreams and our own mistakes.
I no longer want to control anything or anyone. Therefore, I ask that you forgive me and release me too, so that your heart may be filled with love, just like mine. Thank you very much!

 

[rosada]

Powerful!
Thank you!