If I accept invitation how will it affect our relationship? 15>11

[Grandma]

My son hasn't spoken to me for 3 years. He know asked through my daughter if we would come to his house (stay at hotel on him) for Christmas. He hasn't and it appears he doesn't plan on communicating with me unless I am in his presence and will make small talk I guess. I asked how accepting his invite (he's married also) would effect our relationship?
The answer was 15.1.2>11
15 modesty
1st line from wilhelm says be unassuming and make no demands or stipulations so therefore eliminate resistance.
2nd line an modest attitude of mind is a source of good fortune. It gives a possibility of exerting a lasting influence which no one can interfere.
I'm not sure exactly what modesty means, maybe humble?
Idk
But the answer could be linking back to my reasonable to me discomfort of being treated like a second class citizen and not to complain about that. It could be saying go and behave "modestly" and outside agents (my sisters) cannot harm the relationship in the future as it will start to attain some peace and stability. Also I am the parent (I hold a high position iow) so if I behave modestly I will be noticed and if I am in low position (the general way he treats me) I cannot be ignored.
Leads to 11 peace
The small departs ( the crappy way we relate to each other?)
The great approaches (healthy/ healthier relationship between us?)
When the good elements of societ occupy a central position and are in control the evil elements come under their influence and change for the better.
Quotes and paraphrasing from wilhelm
So that what I think that I should be modest unassuming uncomplaining pleasant remorseful? And this will lead to attitude adjustments from him in the future. But for now I won't have any outward status in the situation? I think that's the advice.

 

[ginnie]

Often when we ask how to behave with another, the I Ching answers with hexagram 15, because nothing surpasses a humble attitude. I think you have interpreted the I Ching correctly.

 

[Grandma]

Thank you Ginnie
That's good to know about hex 15
I will try to keep that in mind.

 

[Grandma]

Of course there is another wrinkle here
My son and his wife are suggesting we go dine out Christmas Eve and go to a movie.
I am very broke and even the expense of gas money to get there and tipping at the hotel is money I hadn't planned on spending this month.
It sounds fun to do those things but I can't afford them, I assume its on them but I feel awkward about it.
Line 1 of 15 said not to put forth any claims so maybe I should just go with the flow and not say anything.
I am not in conversation with my son just texting his wife so I can't say anything to him and I feel embarrassed cause he in the past judgede for lack of finances I also just want to go along with what they want to do. Should I say something (text) to her about my concerns? On the other hand 15 says I will be on the side of the lowly. does 15 in general mean not to make waves in general.

 

[ginnie]

Well, no, hex 15 does not mean to not make waves. In this instance, I think you need to speak up now, before you get there. It would be best for you to bring up the subject in a modest way, just as you did in posting here on this forum. Just be straightforward and honest about your money situation.

 

[Grandma]

Thank you Ginnie.
So I asked a few questions and different scenarios
Finally I think I hit in the correct one
Should I pay for dinner?
53.1.5>22
Line 1 I would have to pay my share of the trip expenses in the future so my daughter sounds she might grumble a little about that. Also I am surrounded by danger... Yeah financially I must be careful so I do have to juggle thing and my financial difficulties have made me not spend so much on other gifts ( kept me from being too hasty spending) and his progress is successful (looks like I won't overspend)

Line 5 I don't know who the deceitful people are
But
In the end nothing can hinder her.
I don't think it's going to cause me future financial difficulties by paying.
22 g. Whinicup
Though his gifts are meager
They are beautiful
And he is accepted

So even the small gifts I did buy will be appreciated also besides buying dinner.
I think that sounds good.