Potential Romantic Partner? Hexagram 2, no changing lines!!!

[journey888]

I've been having nothing but closed doors with dating locally in the Southeastern Wyoming, Northern Colorado USA area. I began reaching out, at first, just for the heck of it, to guys around the world. Nothing that impressive except one guy who lives in Manila, Philippines. We've actually been writing and even talking on the phone for weeks now, and he's actually told me how much he'd really like to be "courted" by me. I told him I appreciate our friendship and I think he's an absolutely good looking and adorable guy, but me living in the USA and him in the Philippines would be quite an undertaking for us to ever realistically be a couple though I know many Filipinos have married foreigners, and there's been a lot of success stories. I've even told him that while the odds don't look good, you never know what Fate will do. The way the doors have been closing on me locally, it's got me wondering if I will have to reach further out to find someone special.

I decided to throw coins for a reading on what my potential future is with this guy, and got six consecutive broken lines without any changing lines.

Okay, I-ching experts, what do you think I'm being told?

Thanks for your insights!!!!!

 

[redoleander]

For me personally, Hex 2 UC hadn’t led much of anywhere. It’s usually telling me if I have to push to hard then that’s not it. If you can be more receptive and allow someone to court you or come to you in that situation, I think that’s more of the suggestion.

However it could also simply be saying it’s too soon to tell or to just take it very slow and see how it develops. 2 is very open and receptive. It’s calm and reflective and wise; usually not telling you to hurry much of anywhere. I would definitely listen to what others think too because, as you know and will see, others will have different experiences and perhaps see something I don’t.

 

[strawberry_blood]

Hi @journey888, in a nutshell - I agree with @redoleander, this is not the right time to push if you feel the doors (The Way) are (is) closing locally to you. There is a warning that you may be inviting misfortune if you are pushing against the current at this time, and the Phillipino dude sounds like such a case (this is just running off what the advice of hex 2 UC is and what you have mentioned above re: feeling the doors to dating are currently closed, but you keep knocking).

For a bit of an in-depth breakdown, here an excerpt form my current fave Yi handbook by Kim Anh Lim (you might find it useful, check out especially the last 2 paragraphs, they seem to be speaking to your concerns re: the dating situation): https://www.google.co.uk/books/edition/Practical_Guide_to_the_I_Ching/IFlEbcbWK7QC?hl=en&gbpv=1&dq=inauthor:"Kim-Anh+Lim"&printsec=frontcover




Now, from my personal perspective (not the Yi):

1) Please don't take it the wrong way but I can't believe you can't find a single dude in the whole of the US (at least) to talk to, let alone in your area. It's a huge country (I'm a Russian so can relate). I currently live in the UK (a teensy small island in comparison to either), and have had two serious relationships that started on Tinder. But online dating does require you approach it very strategically, and I'm happy to share with you privately what has worked for me (I also work in e-commerce, so product merchandising and strategic online shopping are my strengths, and the early stages of meeting people online basically boil down to this ).

2) Another one - and please don't take this wrongly either, I'm sharing what I have in the hope this may help, this is no blanket generalisation or attack on any nationality etc. I have been swindled in the past by a long-distance relationship that lasted a year. I did not get swindled financially at least (there are stories of women who have), it simply turned out the fella had been living with a woman all along. I was devastated at the time but it certainly taught me what to test for and to avoid relationships across the ocean as a rule. In some other cases, since you are an American, you have to remember that unfortunately your citizenship is an asset, especially to people from poorer countries. Sorry. A friend of mine has married an American guy and I can tell you I'm 99% sure it was for the passport, although she will not admit it but I know her well enough and can tell. So I am expecting she will probably ditch him in another year or so once she's got permanent status. Jus' sayin'.

The Yi kinda seemed to warn you of failure/getting into an unfavourable situation if you keep pushing, BUT - the advice offered by hex 2 (last paragraph) is to "renew yourself" - so I think reviewing how you position yourself on dating websites is the 1st logical step in this context.

Hope this has helped!

 

[journey888]

Hi @journey888, in a nutshell - I agree with @redoleander, this is not the right time to push if you feel the doors (The Way) are (is) closing locally to you. There is a warning that you may be inviting misfortune if you are pushing against the current at this time, and the Phillipino dude sounds like such a case (this is just running off what the advice of hex 2 UC is and what you have mentioned above re: feeling the doors to dating are currently closed, but you keep knocking).

For a bit of an in-depth breakdown, here an excerpt form my current fave Yi handbook by Kim Anh Lim (you might find it useful, check out especially the last 2 paragraphs, they seem to be speaking to your concerns re: the dating situation): https://www.google.co.uk/books/edition/Practical_Guide_to_the_I_Ching/IFlEbcbWK7QC?hl=en&gbpv=1&dq=inauthor:"Kim-Anh+Lim"&printsec=frontcover


View attachment 3990

Now, from my personal perspective (not the Yi):

1) Please don't take it the wrong way but I can't believe you can't find a single dude in the whole of the US (at least) to talk to, let alone in your area. It's a huge country (I'm a Russian so can relate). I currently live in the UK (a teensy small island in comparison to either), and have had two serious relationships that started on Tinder. But online dating does require you approach it very strategically, and I'm happy to share with you privately what has worked for me (I also work in e-commerce, so product merchandising and strategic online shopping are my strengths, and the early stages of meeting people online basically boil down to this ).

2) Another one - and please don't take this wrongly either, I'm sharing what I have in the hope this may help, this is no blanket generalisation or attack on any nationality etc. I have been swindled in the past by a long-distance relationship that lasted a year. I did not get swindled financially at least (there are stories of women who have), it simply turned out the fella had been living with a woman all along. I was devastated at the time but it certainly taught me what to test for and to avoid relationships across the ocean as a rule. In some other cases, since you are an American, you have to remember that unfortunately your citizenship is an asset, especially to people from poorer countries. Sorry. A friend of mine has married an American guy and I can tell you I'm 99% sure it was for the passport, although she will not admit it but I know her well enough and can tell. So I am expecting she will probably ditch him in another year or so once she's got permanent status. Jus' sayin'.

The Yi kinda seemed to warn you of failure/getting into an unfavourable situation if you keep pushing, BUT - the advice offered by hex 2 (last paragraph) is to "renew yourself" - so I think reviewing how you position yourself on dating websites is the 1st logical step in this context.

Hope this has helped!

Thank you so much for your advice!!! I appreciate
it!!! What did you mean by this:

- so I think reviewing how you position yourself on dating websites is the 1st logical step in this context.

Please advise and thanks again for your council.

Thanks!

 

[strawberry_blood]

Thank you so much for your advice!!! I appreciate
it!!! What did you mean by this:

- so I think reviewing how you position yourself on dating websites is the 1st logical step in this context.

Please advise and thanks again for your council.

Thanks!

Hey @journey888 - no worries, happy to help when I can!

I meant polish up your profile to make sure it attracts the attention of the right audience (same as with any online product sales, only this time the product is you), plus make sure you're on the "happening" sites -some can be a bit slow, it's the case of testing a few at the same time and ditching the ones that don't work. I can give you more detailed tips if you're interested (at least what worked for me), but this is the advice in a nutshell.

 

[Trojina]

For a bit of an in-depth breakdown, here an excerpt form my current fave Yi handbook by Kim Anh Lim (you might find it useful, check out especially the last 2 paragraphs, they seem to be speaking to your concerns re: the dating situation): https://www.google.co.uk/books/edition/Practical_Guide_to_the_I_Ching/IFlEbcbWK7QC?hl=en&gbpv=1&dq=inauthor:"Kim-Anh+Lim"&printsec=frontcover

A word of warning re this book, I have it too. There is no translation of the the I Ching in it all, it's all commentary.

Translation is the actual words of the I Ching translated.
Commentary is someone's ideas about what the text means but it is not the text.

Whilst commentaries are helpful they also narrow fields of meaning down considerably. That's unavoidable for anyone writing any kind of commentary. They narrow the meaning down into the author's perceptions which is fine but not only can one lose meaning if relying upon commentaries rather than Yi's words one can also add in stuff from the commentary that isn't in the I Ching text at all.

Here I'd say an add on was the idea that hexagram 2 is all about renewal just because in the last paragraph of the commentary she says, quoting you

The Yi kinda seemed to warn you of failure/getting into an unfavourable situation if you keep pushing, BUT - the advice offered by hex 2 (last paragraph) is to "renew yourself"

That is the advice of the author not the advice of Yi...although to be fair I don't think she means it as advice. She writes '...this attitude will allow you to renew yourself..' which isn't an instruction to renew yourself exactly.

I wouldn't say there was anything in hexagram 2 about renewing yourself....in terms of what Yi actually says I just go to wiki, Hilary's translation

'Earth.
Creating success from the source, harvest in the constancy of a mare.
A noble one has a direction to go.
At first: confusion. Later: gains a lord.
Fruitful in the southwest, gaining partners.
In the northeast, losing partners.
Peaceful constancy brings good fortune.'

I can write a commentary on that, everyone does when they write about it, but the above is the translation, the words of Yi.


All I'm saying is watch for the danger of taking the words in someone's commentary and thinking those are Yi's words, that can get misleading. It's always best, no matter how good the commentary to go back to Yi.

If you see renewal in the answer that's fine, your take, but be wary of taking commentary, anybody's commentary as the answer in place of what Yi is saying. Of course often the commentary is right for a situation but equally it can throw you way off.

 

[Trojina]

I've been having nothing but closed doors with dating locally in the Southeastern Wyoming, Northern Colorado USA area. I began reaching out, at first, just for the heck of it, to guys around the world. Nothing that impressive except one guy who lives in Manila, Philippines. We've actually been writing and even talking on the phone for weeks now, and he's actually told me how much he'd really like to be "courted" by me. I told him I appreciate our friendship and I think he's an absolutely good looking and adorable guy, but me living in the USA and him in the Philippines would be quite an undertaking for us to ever realistically be a couple though I know many Filipinos have married foreigners, and there's been a lot of success stories. I've even told him that while the odds don't look good, you never know what Fate will do. The way the doors have been closing on me locally, it's got me wondering if I will have to reach further out to find someone special.

I decided to throw coins for a reading on what my potential future is with this guy, and got six consecutive broken lines without any changing lines.

Okay, I-ching experts, what do you think I'm being told?

Thanks for your insights!!!!!

You're asking about potential future with the guy, this specific guy right? You've got a very open answer that it's hard to know what to do with and so actually the relationship might be quite hard to know what to do with. In hexagram 2 the earth is open and ready to give whatever we decide to plant, there's no limits of how much the earth can sustain, it is endlessly fertile.....but it does need fertilising for anything to happen

Yi says

'Earth.
Creating success from the source, harvest in the constancy of a mare.
A noble one has a direction to go.
At first: confusion. Later: gains a lord.
Fruitful in the southwest, gaining partners.
In the northeast, losing partners.
Peaceful constancy brings good fortune.'

There's confusion with no fertilising power, no direction given, no hexagram 1 basically. 1 and 2 need one another to bring this forth to fruition.

'Where's the leader here?' that is the question?


An example; if I had hexagram 2 for a night out with a group of friends I might see it as the whole town is ours, there's no limits, everywhere will accept us, it's an open field. But without direction of some kind we might end up staying home. Earth is inert, when there is no directive to movement it stays still. So I think you might reach an impasse in this relationship where everything is still possible but nothing is actually happening unless initiative comes from somewhere.


You said

. I've even told him that while the odds don't look good, you never know what Fate will do.

That's a very very hexagram 2ish statement, passive, waiting for Fate but in this instance I think Fate would need a shove in one direction or the other to get anywhere.


2uc can be a lovely answer, it is like endless potential to be realised with no limits as to where one might go. But this can easily turn into the field remaining fallow so to speak. Good news is it looks like you could potentially make something of it but how much initiative do you want to take here?

He sounds like hexagram 2 himself when he says

We've actually been writing and even talking on the phone for weeks now, and he's actually told me how much he'd really like to be "courted" by me

If he wants to be courted and you want fate to step in you are both being hexagram 2 and so I wonder if anything will actually take shape between you?


You even have the word 'potential' in your title - the whole thing is total hexagram 2. What would it take to move on from being potential and do you want to actively court him the way he wants or do you prefer to receive direction yourself?

 

[moss elk]

A big message in 2:
Do not take the initiative,
do not try to lead or direct this.

 

[journey888]

You're asking about potential future with the guy, this specific guy right? You've got a very open answer that it's hard to know what to do with and so actually the relationship might be quite hard to know what to do with. In hexagram 2 the earth is open and ready to give whatever we decide to plant, there's no limits of how much the earth can sustain, it is endlessly fertile.....but it does need fertilising for anything to happen

Yi says

'Earth.
Creating success from the source, harvest in the constancy of a mare.
A noble one has a direction to go.
At first: confusion. Later: gains a lord.
Fruitful in the southwest, gaining partners.
In the northeast, losing partners.
Peaceful constancy brings good fortune.'

There's confusion with no fertilising power, no direction given, no hexagram 1 basically. 1 and 2 need one another to bring this forth to fruition.

'Where's the leader here?' that is the question?


An example; if I had hexagram 2 for a night out with a group of friends I might see it as the whole town is ours, there's no limits, everywhere will accept us, it's an open field. But without direction of some kind we might end up staying home. Earth is inert, when there is no directive to movement it stays still. So I think you might reach an impasse in this relationship where everything is still possible but nothing is actually happening unless initiative comes from somewhere.


You said

That's a very very hexagram 2ish statement, passive, waiting for Fate but in this instance I think Fate would need a shove in one direction or the other to get anywhere.


2uc can be a lovely answer, it is like endless potential to be realised with no limits as to where one might go. But this can easily turn into the field remaining fallow so to speak. Good news is it looks like you could potentially make something of it but how much initiative do you want to take here?

He sounds like hexagram 2 himself when he says



If he wants to be courted and you want fate to step in you are both being hexagram 2 and so I wonder if anything will actually take shape between you?


You even have the word 'potential' in your title - the whole thing is total hexagram 2. What would it take to move on from being potential and do you want to actively court him the way he wants or do you prefer to receive direction yourself?

Thanks for giving me a lot to ponder!!! I appreciate your thoughtful answer.

 

[journey888]

A big message in 2:
Do not take the initiative,
do not try to lead or direct this.

Thanks for the answer!

 

[journey888]

A word of warning re this book, I have it too. There is no translation of the the I Ching in it all, it's all commentary.

Translation is the actual words of the I Ching translated.
Commentary is someone's ideas about what the text means but it is not the text.

Whilst commentaries are helpful they also narrow fields of meaning down considerably. That's unavoidable for anyone writing any kind of commentary. They narrow the meaning down into the author's perceptions which is fine but not only can one lose meaning if relying upon commentaries rather than Yi's words one can also add in stuff from the commentary that isn't in the I Ching text at all.

Here I'd say an add on was the idea that hexagram 2 is all about renewal just because in the last paragraph of the commentary she says, quoting you



That is the advice of the author not the advice of Yi...although to be fair I don't think she means it as advice. She writes '...this attitude will allow you to renew yourself..' which isn't an instruction to renew yourself exactly.

I wouldn't say there was anything in hexagram 2 about renewing yourself....in terms of what Yi actually says I just go to wiki, Hilary's translation

'Earth.
Creating success from the source, harvest in the constancy of a mare.
A noble one has a direction to go.
At first: confusion. Later: gains a lord.
Fruitful in the southwest, gaining partners.
In the northeast, losing partners.
Peaceful constancy brings good fortune.'

I can write a commentary on that, everyone does when they write about it, but the above is the translation, the words of Yi.


All I'm saying is watch for the danger of taking the words in someone's commentary and thinking those are Yi's words, that can get misleading. It's always best, no matter how good the commentary to go back to Yi.

If you see renewal in the answer that's fine, your take, but be wary of taking commentary, anybody's commentary as the answer in place of what Yi is saying. Of course often the commentary is right for a situation but equally it can throw you way off.

Thanks for the thoughtful answer!

 

[post-snow]

I've been having nothing but closed doors with dating locally in the Southeastern Wyoming, Northern Colorado USA area. I began reaching out, at first, just for the heck of it, to guys around the world. Nothing that impressive except one guy who lives in Manila, Philippines. We've actually been writing and even talking on the phone for weeks now, and he's actually told me how much he'd really like to be "courted" by me. I told him I appreciate our friendship and I think he's an absolutely good looking and adorable guy, but me living in the USA and him in the Philippines would be quite an undertaking for us to ever realistically be a couple though I know many Filipinos have married foreigners, and there's been a lot of success stories. I've even told him that while the odds don't look good, you never know what Fate will do. The way the doors have been closing on me locally, it's got me wondering if I will have to reach further out to find someone special.

I decided to throw coins for a reading on what my potential future is with this guy, and got six consecutive broken lines without any changing lines.

Okay, I-ching experts, what do you think I'm being told?

Thanks for your insights!!!!!

for me, 2 is about being feminine, ie being courted, not courting a man.- but it is just my impression, i am just a user.

 

[post-snow]

Hi @journey888, in a nutshell - I agree with @redoleander, this is not the right time to push if you feel the doors (The Way) are (is) closing locally to you. There is a warning that you may be inviting misfortune if you are pushing against the current at this time, and the Phillipino dude sounds like such a case (this is just running off what the advice of hex 2 UC is and what you have mentioned above re: feeling the doors to dating are currently closed, but you keep knocking).

For a bit of an in-depth breakdown, here an excerpt form my current fave Yi handbook by Kim Anh Lim (you might find it useful, check out especially the last 2 paragraphs, they seem to be speaking to your concerns re: the dating situation): https://www.google.co.uk/books/edition/Practical_Guide_to_the_I_Ching/IFlEbcbWK7QC?hl=en&gbpv=1&dq=inauthor:"Kim-Anh+Lim"&printsec=frontcover


View attachment 3990

Now, from my personal perspective (not the Yi):

1) Please don't take it the wrong way but I can't believe you can't find a single dude in the whole of the US (at least) to talk to, let alone in your area. It's a huge country (I'm a Russian so can relate). I currently live in the UK (a teensy small island in comparison to either), and have had two serious relationships that started on Tinder. But online dating does require you approach it very strategically, and I'm happy to share with you privately what has worked for me (I also work in e-commerce, so product merchandising and strategic online shopping are my strengths, and the early stages of meeting people online basically boil down to this ).

2) Another one - and please don't take this wrongly either, I'm sharing what I have in the hope this may help, this is no blanket generalisation or attack on any nationality etc. I have been swindled in the past by a long-distance relationship that lasted a year. I did not get swindled financially at least (there are stories of women who have), it simply turned out the fella had been living with a woman all along. I was devastated at the time but it certainly taught me what to test for and to avoid relationships across the ocean as a rule. In some other cases, since you are an American, you have to remember that unfortunately your citizenship is an asset, especially to people from poorer countries. Sorry. A friend of mine has married an American guy and I can tell you I'm 99% sure it was for the passport, although she will not admit it but I know her well enough and can tell. So I am expecting she will probably ditch him in another year or so once she's got permanent status. Jus' sayin'.

The Yi kinda seemed to warn you of failure/getting into an unfavourable situation if you keep pushing, BUT - the advice offered by hex 2 (last paragraph) is to "renew yourself" - so I think reviewing how you position yourself on dating websites is the 1st logical step in this context.

Hope this has helped!

i really like the book you are mentioning!

 

[yarrow77]

I’ve had Hex 2 come up when I’m asking a relationship or a job decision question.
I Ching seems to be saying:
. spend time alone with myself to get ‘re-oriented’ - meditate, journaling, mandala/art, etc.
. inner work to clarify what is important to ME, before going onward
. open my mind to other alternatives, perhaps a new path towards my goal
. PAUSE and reflect. Wait and see before jumping in
. gain some objectivity around my question/issue for MYSELF, not necessarily to please someone else

There’s an old saying among meditators: “Don’t just DO something, SIT there.”
Quote from a friend: “Don’t look for love, love looks for you.”
and another; “Your vibe attracts your tribe.”

Also, I have asked for clarity from the I Ching by asking another question, but my experience is that the I Ching is holding up a mirror to me, and I Ching’s answer is vague.

All the best on your journey!

 

[moss elk]

There’s an old saying among meditators: “Don’t just DO something, SIT there.”

Don't forget this one.

One meditating monk leans over to another monk and says, "Are you also not thinking about what I'm not thinking about?"