Reconciliation Possible? 39.1 > 63

[Cathalina]

Hi everyone.

My long term serious relationship just ended not too long ago. At first my ex and I were very close but then he suddenly became distant (about a week ago) and I asked about reconciliation. I got the hex that means 'waiting' and the response was to learn from my mistakes and not actively try to fix the relationship but rather fix myself and then a reconciliation would be very likely. My ex also told me that right now he was too hurt to get back together and thought time apart would do us good and during this time in which we would remain friends he would see if I REALLY was going to work on myself and we would revisit getting back together then (if he moved on first he would let me know when it was a definite no). Then I found out that he had gotten back together with his ex girlfriend whom he lived with before he met me before he told me that. This came as a complete shock to me and it forced me to change my stance and plans. I honestly believe he is a good person and he is really hurting and confused, I don't think he meant to string me along, I think he didn't tell me because he himself wasn't sure about going through with his ex or returning to me. I obviously can't be friends with him for the time being because I honestly don't want to interfere with their relationship. He doesn't deny he still has strong feelings for me, as I do for him, and when we are together it manifests itself physically. Also, I know that if we remain friends it won't be possible for me to move on. So I started no contact.

But a part of me is holding on to the hope of a possibility to reconcile.I am realizing my mistakes and am seriously fully committed to correcting them, for my self first and foremost. And I really regret losing him. I know it may not happen because he is in a relationship now but based on how he went about with returning to his ex, I honestly don't feel like he did it for the right reasons. I know the I ching is NOT a fortune telling device but based on everything that has led us to where we are now I asked the I ching that if my ex and I spend some time apart now (while I work on myself) can there be a possibility of a reconciliation between us.

The answer was 39 (Obstruction) with line 1 and changing to 63 (After Completion).

I really need some insight. What do you think it means? Is it telling me what it was telling me before, that in time there might be a chance after obstructions are removed (i.e. my mistakes, if his relationship doesn't work out, etc) but that there will be a wait and it will be hard. Or does it seem like it is telling me it is finalized because of the obstruction?

Thank you in advance for your help.

 

[kash]

Hi there,

tough situation to be in, but I think you are doing the right thing by staying away for now. I don't think it is necessarily telling you that there is no chance. This is what Wilhelm says about this line:

Six at the beginning means:
Going leads to obstructions,
Coming meets with praise.

When one encounters an obstruction, the important thing is to reflect on
how best to deal with it. When threatened with danger, one should not strive
blindly to go ahead, for this only leads to complications. The correct thing is,
on the contrary, to retreat for the time being, not in order to give up the
struggle but to await the right moment for action.

So basically I see it as saying take a step back, work on yourself and don't deal with this issue right now.

 

[blue_angel]

Hi,

I find your answer very nice. It seems as a mirror of what you asked,

39- you have obstacles to overcome

Line 1- work on yourself, because it is not the right timing to be with him, and you must wait.

Then 63- you will be able to cross the great river.

So, is it possible to reconcile in the future, I would say this says yes its possible. Is it a for sure yes, no. But it does seem, if you really work on enhancing yourself, there will be light at the end of the tunnel. Another words, work on yourself, and good will happen, you will get stronger, and be in the proper position to be in a relationship, with him or someone better. Kash's take on it is also similar and good. Best wishes!

Blue_Angel

 

[Cathalina]

Thank you Kash, thank you Blue Angel.

This has taken a huge toll on me. The guilt over the break up, the betrayal on his part, and accepting that he won't be part of my life anymore after one year of love, memories, and plans, At least not right now and perhaps not even in the future but for now I really should accept the possibility that he might not be in my future either so if it doesn't happen I won't be disappointed. But I can't sleep, as tiered as my body is, even if I try to still my mind. I can't eat, it makes me feel like throwing up. I am tempted to ask the I ching more about how to re-centering myself but really it has already told me what I need to do. It can't do the work for me.

I really appreciate the I ching, and you. It tells me exactly what I need to know. Work on myself - nothing but GOOD can come from that. And it gives me closure so I can take it in small doses, one day at a time, until eventually everything is okay.

 

[nAstWr]

Any update?
I asked if I will have a relationship in 2017 and yi answered 39.1/63 too.

 

[Believe]

I am curious too. Any updates?

I got a 3.3 to 63 for relationship.
And got 39.1 to 63 for job.