relationship help

[alev]

Thank you all for help on my recent thread on modesty, now I have unfortunately another situation on my hands that I need help with. This involves my boyfriend who recently left me for another girl and just decided to come back to me. I am obviously being very cautious but I do love him and want to work things out. I am just having major trust issues going on inside me. I feel insecure bout my position (being a sucker) and feel like he could very well do this again.
I asked the I ching is he going to leave me again for another girl? 40.1.4-->19
it seems the iching thinks so? I am the big toe?
Is he here to stay for good (meaning has he found what he wants in me)?40.6-->64
does this talk about him removing me for good (am I now the hawk?) or it is a "bull's eye" meaning this is what he wants?
is he dating around behind my back? 6.3-->44
I am at a loss with this but the 44 rings loud alarm bells for me
and I am probably beating this to death but I asked am i the only one he wants to be with now? 32 unchanging, if he considers me "the one" 53.6-->39, and if he loves me and got 42.1.2-->4
I feel like some are good sign but the other readings are throwing me off and the hex 4 in the last reading...am I being ignorant?, Can anyone look at this picture of readings and tell me honestly if this looks bad as I think. I know I have jealousy issues anyways that I am trying to work on and don't want to voice to him just yet so I don't know if these fears are all in my head or not. any help is appreciated...

 

[elias]

1. Don't ask yes/no questions.

2. Slow. Down. Ask a question, look through three or four or five or more interpretations. Sleep on it. If the answer isn't clear, ask for more information. Stay on one issue until you feel a resolution.

Seeing #4 often indicates that you're pressing for an easy answer, or a preferred answer, rather than contemplating what's been offered to you. As a good teacher, IC expects you to bring some mental effort to these responses, rather than having it all handed to you.

 

[alev]

well, thank you for taking the time to reply however, I almost ALWAYS ask yes or no questions and have found the I ching does respond well to these questions and the vast majority of the time am able to get the message from the reading. I decided to post this batch of readings because I felt the answers were such a mixed bag (in my biased eyes) and yes, I am very emotional over the issue so I probably do need to slow down (easier said then done). I am definately not looking for an "easy answer" or "preferred answer" either, I am willing to accept bad omens from the readings to help me make the best decision for my life. This is after all, the reason I've asked the questions in the first place. That being said, I do understand the appearance of hex 4 signifying that I am just not getting it! Trouble is, I don't get it and my heart is so torn right now I was hoping to get a brutally honest, unbiased, objective opinion on the readings.
Again, thank you for taking the time to read through my post and listen to my plight

 

[gene]

Alev

The real question you need to ask yourself is, "Do I have an inner connection with this man?" If you do, then as the first line commentary says, (hexagram 40) The hindrance is past, deliverance has come. If you do not, then as line four commentary says, "must free yourself with chance aquaintances with whom he (she) has no inner connection? The first and fourth line do connect but they are in their wrong places. Hence the I Ching throws the question back on you. You must intuit the situation with this one thing in mind. Do you have an inner connection. I suspect, but cannot insure, that the sixth line is him, not you. It says, He must be forcibly removed. I cannot concur completely with this, however. It is beyond my understanding. Line three of Six carries the same theme in the sense of deciding wether this is truly your possession. You must listen to your heart.

Gene

 

[alev]

Gene, i came back here a few days ago and saw your post and could not believe how insightful and thoughtful it was. It made a lot of sense and I took my time calm myself before asking. I know in my own heart that I feel a strong connection with this man, he is the man I want to marry without a doubt. But I understand the implications of what you are saying as well, an inner connection must exist and be felt by both parties to support a lasting bond. I definately see that in the hex 6 line 3 reading now, I can't believe I didn't catch that to begin with, it seems so obvious now! So knowing how I feel in my heart I asked the questions:
Is there an inner connection between us? hex 46 unchanging
does he feel the same inner connection with me as I do with him? hex 29 unchanging
and lastly, because this is very important to me, Is he willing and able to offer me now the commited relationship I need? hex 55 line 4 changing to 36

I am a bit stumped with the first two but overall I think i feel much at ease with these castings. I am interpreting 46 to mean that it is a lasting inner connection that is pushing upwards step by step in a solid way. Am I right with this? I think that sounds like a solid bond between two people even though not as obvious an answer if I'd receive one of the more typical "relationship hexes" But I think it shows something is there and is growing even more than what it is now
I am hesitant to think to positively about hex 29 in the context of the question I asked. I asked if he had felt this connection because I know that sometimes we can have a strong bonds with people yet not necessarily be aware of the connection or... I know he wants me that is why he wants me back, and the attraction is unbelievable but was trying to clarify I guess if this is merely a superficial thing or am i just his "safety net" if other options do no work out for him. I don't know, maybe it was a poor question to ask. The judgement only says IF you are sincere...
however, my last reading does leave me hopeful and makes me think I am doing the right thing giving him another chance and staying with him. I really resonated with the explanation given in one translation that says:
"Here the darkness is already decreasing, therefore interrelated elements come together. here too the complement must be found – the necessary wisdom to complement joy of action. Then everything will go well."

interrelated elements coming together sounds much like the elements I need for this relationship (commitment!) coming together to make this work.
Maybe I am a fool but in case it is not already obvious, I am going to stay with him and work things out