Relationship question: 22.3 (husband) and 40.4 (colleague)

[ellejaytee]

Hi all,
My first post here and I'd really appreciate your advice.
I am in a situation where I need to make a decision about my commitment to my marriage. I asked about our future and received 22.3. This seems to be telling me that this situation is not as it seems. I'm feeling that the foundation is not strong and solid, but there are a lot of really pleasing, nice, "glistening" things on top of it- a beautiful house and material possessions, but these don't indeed nourish me.

At the same time, I am very attracted to a colleague, and although nothing is really possible there, I have never ever felt so drawn to another person in my life. I asked about that future and received 40.4. I am interpreting it as the need to let go of judgment, expectations, control, and just trust that I will end up in a place where I have what I need?

The reason I have posted is that on the surface, I would have expected to receive the readings the other way around! ie: that I should trust my husband more, and release the past, the negative experiences etc. and that my colleague is the "shiny" distraction that I should leave behind.

I would really appreciate comments/ inputs around my interpretation, or how you would read this situation, given your deeper knowledge?

Many thanks! Much appreciated!

 

[Trojina]

In a sense there's nothing here to ask about or rather you aren't really asking about anything concrete. I've read the post a few times and the question just keeps disappearing, maybe that's the 22.3, maybe 22.3 is a comment on your mindset right now ?


I mean there's nothing going on with the colleague and you don't know if there ever will be so there's no real imperative for ending your marriage is there ?

40 says if you have something to do then do it and if you don't then return to normal business as usual. I think 40.4 has to do with simplification. There doesn't seem to be any moves coming from the colleague, you said he's not available so isn't your commitment to the marriage the same as it always was ?


I think maybe 22.3 shows you very much on the surface of your own question. The question is a fascinating diversion, an enjoyable one perhaps but do you have any particular destination as to what you will be doing with this dream ?

Funny you also used the word 'surface' here, a word very connected to 22

The reason I have posted is that on the surface, I would have expected to receive the readings the other way around! ie: that I should trust my husband more, and release the past, the negative experiences etc. and that my colleague is the "shiny" distraction that I should leave behind.

I don't think at this point in time there is any real or hard decision you need to take, I wonder with line 3 whether you are creating that whole thing yourself. Supposing nothing will ever happen with your colleague well then why would you leave your husband ? I just get this feeling this is much more in your head than something you will actually take action over. I don't mean you are a fantasist it's just for some reason I notice I can't get hold of this question, that feels very 22.3 and I think the 22.3 is your whole perception of the marriage and colleague but that isn't really connected to what's actually there. Perhaps for now you can excuse yourself of the need to make decisions and let it go for a while.

 

[ellejaytee]

Thankyou so much Trojina, this is a really helpful reply! I think you could be right that my focus is on the wrong thing (the surface) and perhaps I need to let my thinking go, and see what happens. The two issues really are separate and the only thing connecting them is me! Much better to work on myself and what I want, rather than daydream!

Thankyou again xx

T