relationship question

[shefa]

i recently ended a relationship and now i am having some second thoughts. i turned to the yi and would welcome your perspective and interpretations:

what is the best approach for me to take with this relationship for my own well-being? -- 35 unchanging

what out come if I do not pursue this relationship further? -- 33 with 4 and 5 changing to 52

-thank you

 

[willowfox]

"what is the best approach for me to take with this relationship for my own well-being? -- 35 unchanging"

This is now a time of progress for you, you are out of a relationship and this allows you to make progress on your own. Now is the time to find your own inner values and live by them, to find peace. If you try to go back to the relationship, you will not find happiness, so take no notice of what others in your circle say, just go about your own business and concentrate on what you want to achieve, you are independent now.

"what out come if I do not pursue this relationship further? -- 33 with 4 and 5 changing to 52"

Hex 33.4, 5 these two lines are about leaving the relationship, which you have now done, but they advice you to stick to your decision and in no way be influenced into going back to the relationship. It says quite clearly stay away from the old relationship.

Hex 52 is about keeping still, keeping still as in not going back to the relationship, keeping still as in not worrying about the past. Time to forget about the past and live for the present and don't think about the future, just settle down and find peace of mind, keep calm and centered, then everything will sort itself out in due course.

 

[shefa]

hi willowfox and others,

thank you for the response. here is where i get stuck when it comes to yi interpretations: i believe the WAY i ask the question is very relevant to HOW the answer should be interpreted. do you agree? do others agree?

i always thought that 35 was about sex and passion - and so when i get that answer in response to the question as i worded it - what is the BEST APPROACH for me to take regarding this relationship- i didn't ask for feedback about having broken up - one of my interpretations talks about male-female compatibility - you see why i am confused.

although regarding lines 4 and 5 with 33, i agree that it is clear that a withdrawal is successful. so could this mean that if i follow through on this breakup that it will be successful, but that if i don't we are compatible?

more help, please.

-thank you

 

[asci_blue]

I'm with Willowfox on this. You've decided what you're going to do in regards to the relation now you must proceed with your decision.

 

[shefa]

thanks. i hear you and i appreciate the help. i would like to ask how you see 35 about me only and not about the relationship, espeically when 35 is about relationship. unless there is some indication that it is about a new relationship?

 

[shefa]

also, the state of my mind when i asked the question was more like, "what should i do, there is so much good here" even though yes, i had already decided to brake. obviously he doesn't want that. maybe i'll ask another question to help me relax about all this.

 

[willowfox]

thanks. i hear you and i appreciate the help. i would like to ask how you see 35 about me only and not about the relationship, espeically when 35 is about relationship. unless there is some indication that it is about a new relationship?

The question was, what you should do about the ex relationship, the best approach to take for your own well being and the IC has given you Hex 35 progress. Progress can only be made now by being independent and self reliant, not stuck in some dead end relationship.

Of course it is entirely up to you whether you want to return to the relationship or be independent and make some progress with your life.

 

[hilary]

Hexagram 35... progress, enjoying the gifts you have been given and making the most out of them you possibly can. As an unchanging hexagram perhaps it turns the question back to you: where is your 'gift of horses' in this situation? What really has the potential to multiply and become rich and wonderful?

The second reading is about retreating (from the relationship) to safeguard your true self and find inner stability. Not remotely easy when you have formed a strong attachment, but 'good fortune' all the same. So looking at the two readings together, it seems as though your best and most beautiful horses might be found in 'loving retreat', in your own resources. Good fortune for your greater self, even if it feels disastrous from a 'smaller' point of view.

Does that make some sense?