Roommate relationship

[anatio]

I've been thinking about the relationship with my roommate, because sometimes I get these weird vibes but can't put a finger on it. Generally speaking we're in good terms, but lately I decided to pull away to gain a better perspective and examine my attitude and behavior but also the whole situation and realized that I was more into maintaining the relationship than my roommate. I wonder what the I Ching says.

1. Can I trust my roommate? 61.5 > 41
2. How should I behave towards my roommate? 16.1.2.3 > 34

 

[diamant]

Can I trust my roommate? 61.5 > 41
No. If you trust this person, you will lose out or get hurt (41).

How should I behave towards my roommate? 16.1.2.3 > 34
Strange answer.
Being enthusiastic, and unstable, and indecisive, causes bullying?
So don't be enthusiastic, unstable, and indecisive? Not sure on this one.

 

[grassgrowing]

1. Can I trust my roommate? 61.5 > 41

Yes, so long as your roommate can trust you as well.
"When one inspires confidence, then one binds. Without fault." (LiSe 61.5)
This is about "Binding" one to one's own cause, but not through force. Inspiring confidence in your roommate will strengthen or "Bind" the relationship, though only if you put forth your best effort with sincerity and compassion behind it. If you at all distrust them already, even dull people will be able to pick up on this element and will quickly develop distrust for you in return. Everything from animals to the invisible spirits which surround us pick up on what we put out. Humans, while obscured by passion and attachment, have this same innate sense which guides their decisions. In short terms, if you desire an improvement in the quality of the relationship, you will need to be completely sincere about your intentions.

2. How should I behave towards my roommate? 16.1.2.3 > 34

Rely on your intuition to sense the "World Music". To eliminate any discordant elements, we have to put effort into playing along with the tune of others. At the same time, these bouts of enthusiastic, springtime action do sometimes lead to pitfalls.
"Known for the weaving of images. pitfall." (LiSe 16.1)
While you should be sincere in this situation, be cautious of acting without thinking. Take this as an advisory to rely especially on your intuition and observations. Do not act without thinking carefully. In other words, don't bring up your concerns about trust directly. It would be better to carefully select the right time and place than to rush in and tackle this entire subject in one go. Perhaps it is better to gradually change your behavior towards this person than to ever approach them directly about your concerns. Are you weaving too many images to deceive yourself and others?
"Shielded between rocks. Not to the end of the day. divination auspicious." (LiSe 16.2)
You might not to be as guarded about this as you first suspected. It is best to rely on your intuition, but examine all situations as multi-faceted. The Yi's hexagrams have countless approaches. To cut to the center of the diamond of truth, we have to approach the labyrinthine structures of our life in a way that is firm & resolute but also allowing for compromise. Wait for the right time. Listen and observe.
"Big-eyed weaving of images: regret. Hesitation brings regret." (LiSe 16.3)
It is best to be quiet in this situation and not speak directly about your lack of trust or your concerns. Carefully and quietly change behaviors to improve the situation. If it can be improved, it will be accomplished through sincere but subtle change.

Other Considerations
This situation might be about decreasing some excess (41) or yielding to the laws of the universe while maintaining your bravery (34). All interactions, both human and non-human, contain an energy or essence. Who must decrease what behavior here? Is there excess spending or too much of something else? Is someone not yielding to the natural flow of things? If the right room is made for an improvement in this situation, the improvement may come from above (41.5) seemingly out of nowhere. It might also involve rectifying any internal conflicts or anxieties (34.2) you have over this situation to improve your own confidence. If vigorous action to change the situation is required, it is better to pick the time and the place to "capture" the situation rather than attain your aims through overt means (34.3). You must provide a sufficient foundation for heaven to release its blessing (34.1).

Your ability to transform this situation depends on a combination of overcoming internal doubts and dedicating vigor without going overboard. Tap into the same subtleties which directed you to ask the Yi. Bring your internal mechanisms into order before deciding on the level of action required to rectify any external problems here.

 

[danadanadana]

I've been thinking about the relationship with my roommate, because sometimes I get these weird vibes but can't put a finger on it. Generally speaking we're in good terms, but lately I decided to pull away to gain a better perspective and examine my attitude and behavior but also the whole situation and realized that I was more into maintaining the relationship than my roommate. I wonder what the I Ching says.

1. Can I trust my roommate? 61.5 > 41

Hexagram 61 - Inner Truth - you went within to examine questions you had about your roommate. This is a wise and worthy effort!

Line 5 - when you put yourself at the center of your world everything falls into place around you, in this way you won't ever feel that your roommate is less into maintaining the relationship, or that you are secondary, or less than in any way.

Changing to Hexagram 41 - There is a time to be generous and give to others but only when it feels right, if you begin to feel things are out of balance then examine you feelings and try to resolve things.

 

[anatio]

Thanks everyone for replying and sorry for responding late.
Update. Neither of us made a move to improve the relationship. We only communicated strictly about the payments around the home, nothing more. It was very tense.
We weren't talking like the old days and laughing. It turned out, the landlord asked her to move out to make room for another person.

 

[redoleander]

It’s interesting because 61.5 has meant this for my before; that some kind of moving on will occur. It’s not really about things staying as they are even though I could see interpreting it as “boundaries” but for me it’s always been about leaving or someone else leaving. I guess maybe it was saying the trust issue isn’t relevant, it’s about the moving forward that was about to occur?

 

[anatio]

It’s interesting because 61.5 has meant this for my before; that some kind of moving on will occur. It’s not really about things staying as they are even though I could see interpreting it as “boundaries” but for me it’s always been about leaving or someone else leaving. I guess maybe it was saying the trust issue isn’t relevant, it’s about the moving forward that was about to occur?

Yes, it makes sense. Taking your interpretation, and from todays perspective, I realize I wanted some kind of moving forward.