Sad Heart Needs Help

[yly2pg1]

If you both are at the starting point of your relationship, most probably you do not have to worry too much. There may be some hardships at first due to the constraints and responsibilities that follow. Things will get better later when both side get used to it, with more ease and joy.

 

[learner]

Dear Anonymous,

"Men bound in fellowship first weep and lament,
But afterward they laugh.
After great struggles they succeed in meeting"

I think that the fifth line image is self-explanatory. Difficulties have to be overcome, problems have to be dealt with, obstacles have to be removed. By doing so, you can have the relationship that you want.

If you have not read the commentary in Wilhelm's translation, you might enjoy it.

"Life leads the thoughtful man on a path of many windings.
Now the course is checked, now it runs straight again.
Here winged thoughts may pour freely forth in words,
There the heavy burden of knowledge must be shut away in silence.
But when two people are at one in the inmost hearts,
They shatter even the strength of iron or of bronze.
And when two people understand each other in their inmost hearts,
Their words are sweet and strong, like the fragrance of orchids."

All the best,
Mirian

 

[cal val]

Hi Anonymous...

*tight hug* I just got this one this weekend when I asked the Yi if I'm really going to remarry in this lifetime. But this is one I get periodically in recent years.

Hold on dear Anonymous. The Yi really likes your loved one for you. This is a good relationship that they'd like to see make it through turbulent times. Your loved one is probably going through something difficult right now... the Yi's not saying what. The Yi is only telling you your loved one is indeed precious and to hold on.

Love,

Val

 

[pam]

Val,

That is indeed a good line to throw - and I'm glad you have also been getting it in regard to you remarrying....makes me happy for you. In fact, that is the first good news of my day. I spent the day frustrated over my son's lack of progress in school and his apparent indifference to it. I was so bummed over his problem with physics that I refused to get up this morning and make a trade that unfortunately would have been a huge winner - $2.00 up on the day. Then when I did get up and pack his lunch, I was leafing through his binder and found someone else's physics homework. His walk to school friend was already standing in the living room waiting so I didn't confront him - now when BBall practice is over I have to have a talk with him. He just never seemed like the type of kid to cheat - he is actually pretty sweet and honest. Some days I just don't know how to approach this school thing without alienating him completely. I can't ignore the cheating thing (some girl I don't know gave him her paper apparently). Yet, everytime I think I have made some progress with him, he backslides into middle-of-the-road grades and "I don't have any homework" excuses.

Ugh. I never had these problems with the older two. Why now?

Sorry to take over this stream - Anonymous got a good throw for her love interest - I think things will work out very well for her.

love, Pam

 

[cal val]

Hi Pam...

I'm so sorry to hear you're having problems with your son. I have a mantra I used to chant when my daughter was growing up that helped get me safely through the rough times. And I'm sharing it with you in hopes you might find comfort in it.

"Just because she's a teen does not qualify it as justifiable homicide so don't do it.
Just because she's a teen does not qualify it as justifiable homicide so don't do it.
Just because she's a teen does not qualify it as justifiable homicide so don't do it."

Thanks so much for the warm and caring response to my own 13.5. It's funny, but the reason I asked the Yi if I'm REALLY going to remarry in this lifetime because THEIR chant lately has been 54.4... so I just sort of said... "Reaaaalllly???"

Love,

Val

 

[pam]

Val,

Well, sort of good news - as soon as he got home I asked him how school was and then told him (with no attitude, just a question) that I had seen another girl's homework in his physics binder and he said without hesitation and looking right at me, "oh, that was Jennifer's - Mr. X let us do our homework in class and she had forgotten her binder Friday so she asked if I would hang onto it cause it was raining." This, of course, could have been a lie, but my lie detector mind was indicating 'truth' so I let it go. At least if he was lying he is now put on notice that I pay attention to stuff like that and will be extremely upset if it is true. I honestly think, though, that he was telling the truth. He didn't even act upset that I had looked in his binder or sound like he was covering up. He just went on to the next subject - a problem with French vowels, and the fact that he was starving and it was still two hours before dinner.

So thanks for the wonderful mantra. And I think the Yi is definitely telling you to hang in there - someone great is coming for you. Also - caught the pic of your beautiful grandson - such a doll. My own little guys are now 2 (this month) and 2-1/2 months. The older one sings me the ABC song on the phone and tells me "grandma pam, I love you" in the sweetest voice. I saw them in August but I sure wish we lived closer. Pretty soon your little guy will talk enough to be telling you that on the phone. It's such a great feeling - and I won't have to manage his teenage rebellion ever - I can just show up and take him out for dinner and spoil him with whatever the new version of teenage 'must have an ipod' will be by then!

love, Pam

 

[cal val]

Pam...

Happy happy joy joy. So he'll live to produce yet another grandchild (or more) for you to spoil after all! (I hope you can appreciate my rather dry sense of humor.)

Yet another picture of my one and only (17 months now)...

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Anonymous...

Is Sad heart a happy or at least hopeful heart yet?

Love,

Val