What is the best way to overcome my fear of love? 60.5 changing to 19

[leepdx]

I have been going through a slow transformation and am facing many unpleasant truths about myself and my past choices. I have spent most of my life choosing incompatible partners because I was so glad someone wanted me. But this compromise of heart has become a burden and I know I can't continue in this way if I want to experience a loving relationship. The Yi seems clear that I must be more discriminating but I am confused by 19 as the resulting hexagram as I asked a question about myself and it seems to discuss another person. There is a man I would like to get to know but I feel the need to cleanse my heart before getting involved with someone again. Interestingly when I first asked about this man awhile ago I received 51.2.4 changing to 19, so clearly 19 is meaningful. Any insights would be much appreciated. Many thanks.

 

[Trojina]

All is well and in balance with 60.5. 19 is not the resulting hexagram as in 'the future' it is the setting of the question. I can't for the life of me imagine why you'd worry about this answer and with one line moving that line is very important.

19 is not talking about another person It is the nearing of something. By the look of it the nearing of emotional balance


60.5 generally says you are in control of your emotions, balanced, you got your **** together. I think you have already achieved what you set out to in emotional terms. Yi is saying you are not afraid of love, that in fact you are well balanced.

 

[leepdx]

Thank you for the helpful perspective, being honest with myself about love relationships has been a long process maybe all the soul searching has me seeing things in the hazy light of dawn.

 

[jzy369]

...19 is not the resulting hexagram as in 'the future' it is the setting of the question. ...

Thanks for clarify this point. Several books says the last one is the "result" and I frequently find that a bit awkward. Setting of the question is much better, I will start using it.

Leepdx, in the original Chinese text, hex 19 contains wording about "re-evaluate the progress in August, and it will be a tough hurdle to cross". Hex 20 is associated with August, so August symbolizes a critical time down the road. Maybe this text applies in your situation.

 

[Trojina]

here is a blog post of Hilary's on that old 'relating hexagram conundrum' http://onlineclarity.co.uk/answers/2013/06/01/the-old-resulting-hexagram-conundrum/

 

[leepdx]

Thank you jzy369 for the new look at the eighth month which always sounds so ominous, reevaluation sounds much more manageable. And Trojina for the educational link.

 

[bradford]

step up. no cleansing heart first. just learn as you go.