Clarity,
Office 17622,
PO Box 6945,
London.
W1A 6US
United Kingdom
Phone/ Voicemail:
+44 (0)20 3287 3053 (UK)
+1 (561) 459-4758 (US).
I asked the I ching "Why are my relationships tumultous, and will it improve?"
27.2.4 -->38
I then asked, what can he provide in the relationship?
16.4-->2.
Then I don't see why our relationship is so rocky. We're both libras so I know peace means alot.. and I always envision some other scenario with him, but it's not working. It's as if I and him, or either one of us really likes the rockiness.
Willow, her first question was a general one I think, and not about the guy or present relationship in particular.
I think ones relationship to the self is the most important one
* I think that we're not one personality, but multiple personalities, shifting 'I's that take turns coming to the fore and claiming the 'I' for a while before another one occupies the 'I' chair. That's why a person can be calm and happy one moment and in tears the next; confused one moment and enraged the next; scared one moment and laughing the next (Hex 51). I used to think I was one person with different mental states; now I believe I'm actually a number of personalities which take turns being 'I'.
* I also think that it's not so much one's relationship with oneself that's important, as getting to know the different personalities in me - how they work, what triggers them, how they operate when they're active, how often they're activated, how I can deal with them, how to weaken them if they're problematic, how to encourage them and sustain them if they're useful - that sort of thing. In a word, self-knowledge.
* I think self-knowledge is important for two reasons. For one thing, if you know yourself better, sometimes small afflictions dry up and blow away on their own. This has happened with me. Sometimes you have to put work into it though, and train yourself to change attitudes and behaviors, but for the intermediate stuff, it can work if you're willing to put in the effort and if you get the help of like-minded people. Support is so important. But for some things, you can't change. It's important to recognize that.
If you come to know something about yourself that you can't change, there's two things. One, stop wasting your time trying to change or beating yourself up for it - accept it in other words. A friend of mine went through a series of DISASTROUS relationships and concluded in the end that relationship is not good for her, and not for her in this lifetime. She's happier now. Two, it's possible I believe to develop a new dimension of being in oneself at a higher level of consciousness than you're at now. (I think this is an idea you don't like much, but I really believe it. Maybe I believe it because I NEED to believe it, so if you don't like it much, please don't trash it too enthusiastically lol.) At a higher level of consciousness, the stuff that bothered you and hurt before doesn't bother you or hurt so much now.
dontcha think, maybe we just need to close our eyes a bit more often
When faced with a task I am uncertain of I've been known to command, "Will the part of me that knows how to do this please take control!"
Clarity,
Office 17622,
PO Box 6945,
London.
W1A 6US
United Kingdom
Phone/ Voicemail:
+44 (0)20 3287 3053 (UK)
+1 (561) 459-4758 (US).