Good morning good people,

I have a final court hearing tomorrow and had a sleepless night struggling with this question.

I have heard dreadful stories about X' s behaviour. They come from a reliable source although X' s involvement as perpetrator or just a witness is a grey area. His previous behaviour makes his character doubtful.

I want my son to have a father but what kind of influence would he be.

I asked Should X have access to Y. Hexagram 9.2.3.6 to 3

9 to 3 would suggest it's difficult even doing small things.

Line 2 It's good to withdraw
Line 3 Communication is non existent
Line 6 I have grieved over this and have some peace in it. If I push things will get ugly. Things are coming to a head. Am I the noble one? If so my decisions will come to no good. I think the judge is the noble one. And his decisions will lead to no good.

I'm not finding much guidance in this...

So I asked What attitude should I have towards X? And got hexagram 28.2.4 to 39

I should recognise my extreme emotions are causing an impasse. Line 2 Good relations Line 4 Keep the faith and I will find a solution.

Faith I guess. Is all I need. Settle myself and go through this.

It's so hard to see the forest here. I hope I'm seeing this right. Are there warnings here that I'm missing? Am I right to be concerned? Or are my emotions going to ultimately hurt my son.

Any thoughts or views would be most welcome. I'm quite strong so you can be sure I won't take offence or be defensive.

Thank you in advance and God Bless.

Hi there

Out the two questions I like the second one as you are asking, what you can do about the situation. Or more what is in your control. Sometimes the Yi gives us answers that make no sense at the time. I find that at least like when things are going well then you get what kind of appears a negative answer or if things are not going so well then you may get a positive response. I have often wondered why this is so. It actually makes sense as when things are going well, really you should be storing your nuts for the winter, or when things seem dark, you need sound advice to get you on track. I believe this is the case here.

28 obviously is a good analogy of your state of mind here, 28 is to me in general the weight of the world or feels like that however line 2 when i have asked business questions is a renewal its actually quite positive, new shoots on an old tree, something possibly surprising and fresh, and line 4 seems to back it up that i believe in staying positive. 39 I am not altogether sure maybe only you know what it means exactly it could either be the background to the whole situation or it may in this case be a positive thing where its like your protection.
39 to me is like a big boulder on a pathway in the bush. So it could be in fact by some how attempting to look at this in a fresh way and line 4 staying positive you will be protected.

Time and time again the Yi tells us that we cant control the actions of others and it is very wise advice as situations with others in this context are really apart of life. In general I think the advice is dont let this drag you down. Keep in mind life is short and maybe you shouldnt keep dwelling in a negative way.

I would be asking " how do I stay positive" as that I think maybe the hard part.
It's no wonder you received 28 as this has been on ongoing battle of sorts. It may be a nice thought he maybe sick of it as well. However I dont know that,

So chin up soldier I guess

Steve

steve said:

It actually makes sense as when things are going well, really you should be storing your nuts for the winter, or when things seem dark, you need sound advice to get you on track. I believe this is the case here.
Steve

Click to expand...

Hi Steve
Hexagram 9.2.3.6 3 Should X have access to Y

Thank you for your reply. In future I'll look to ask questions within my control. I think you are right, I've been given an answer to suit my need, to soothe me, which is lovely. I've thought about it a bit today. I generally read three lines in a continuum so Line 6 is telling me clearly, I've won the battle, lay low, don't get cocky. Adversity is on the rise and if I go in negative I'll lose the war.

steve said:

28 obviously is a good analogy of your state of mind here, 28 is to me in general the weight of the world or feels like that however line 2 when i have asked business questions is a renewal its actually quite positive, new shoots on an old tree, something possibly surprising and fresh, and line 4 seems to back it up that i believe in staying positive. 39 I am not altogether sure maybe only you know what it means exactly it could either be the background to the whole situation or it may in this case be a positive thing where its like your protection.
39 to me is like a big boulder on a pathway in the bush. So it could be in fact by some how attempting to look at this in a fresh way and line 4 staying positive you will be protected.
Steve

Click to expand...

Hexagram 28.2.4 39 What attitude should I have towards X

It's strange that instead of saying what attitude I should have 28 certainly does reflect my state of mind I still have issues but you're right I need to go in there looking for those new shoots in Line 2. It's a steep hill to think anything might actually grow after the last couple of years lol.

He actually text and asked if I'd like to go to dinner and a movie the three of us... I'm unsure I could be trusted with my utensils across from him truly I do need to be more positive but I think going out with him would have led to the humiliation in Line 4. So you're right I need to be positive but stand firm in my on guidance, firm in my character. Surely we will be protected.

Thanks Steve, You've helped me flesh quite a bit more out of that. 39 is probably talking about the impasse my emotions have built, he hasn't rung our son since January. It's been a relief and I guess going back into communication with him and this situation is a huge boulder I don't want to face. It's my responsibility though and as overwhelming as it is, I have to.

What's in my control? Don't drag out the negative and focus on what makes me positive. Excellent advice. I'm desperately trying to stay positive, I'm reading The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer and making an effort in guided meditations. Tbh as this date has come closer the fear has started to overtake me.

Thank you so much for taking the time to respond. My perspective is clearer, I feel I have a better handle on where I need to be internally and my best approach.

Have a great week!!!

Just in response. I went to court today and X didn't show up.

It went in my favour. I have day to day care. He has supervised access, with and when I arrange it.

I've asked him to start his phone calls again and then I will sort visits. I've also asked him to be fair regarding our sons inheritance.

So I'm hoping all goes well from here with him and in the meantime I can refocus on us and moving forward positively.

When asking How does he feel about himself. I got hexagram 18.3. Amazing iching.

Thats great news, I actually drew 9.6 today as well. haha, yea i took this as extremely lucky. I was asking about my business. We are actually in a similar situation, getting this business to the position it is has been long and drawn out. I have basically been disciplining the devils country. At times it has been really hard.
I believe I am going to pretty successful shortly. I took 9.6 as relax you have done all you can for now and yes it kind of feels like winning a war.

Interesting
Steve