new member, but I visited this forum for some years now. I worked my whole life, move to another country worked again. Now I am not at full retirement age and there is a package offer to retire for a lump sum, about half a year worth of pay. I have no pension but will have SS. Each day since this packaged arrived I wake up and tell myself this is an opportunity to just go and figure out who am I, what i want, and do what i want...,. without being defined by my job. My best friends ,from way back, congratulate me,,,, Then I think how much I will miss the morning challenge and daily work (I am an engineer) I have grand kids I want to leave them something/money for school too. I am also afraid I will be poor and although I do not look for material things in life, I am still uneasy with poverty at old age. My work is v. v.stressfull, maybe because i put too much pressure on myself. I like it and is still too much. I feel like locomotive heading the concrete wall. never had time to go to physicals find out if I am ok. Hope you did not fall asleep...Otherwise I do nto look acceptable anymore,,,washing the hair only everyother day,, still wear make-up but gained 30 lbs (also my father died a couple of years ago, so that may be from that). I asked my three girls if anyone needs me to help with kids (they live far away), and they politely said no. I wear same clothes each day at work, almost:? I have two pairs of pants and 5 shirts;one for Monday, ,,,,,). I do not need anyone's validation, do not work for that, feel I can still turn the world around, probably delusional. So I could take the severance packet and go work somewhere else, but my husband is still working in this town we live, and I think I do not want to go alone in the world (still debating on this one). I have some projects unfinished that will keep me busy.. but the bottom line: life is not infinite, have to detach and go, if ever... I also asked for a top engineering job a while ago and i did not get it so it looks like no future for me here; I still feel my life is missing something (and that is not love, no longer capable of that),,,or just be lazy and spend by myself, although I am always worrying about family.So I asked today (I ask daily, but today from another angle): what should be my priorities when I am making this decision. What should be on my short list. (The decision - if I lost you - is: to take the retirement package or not).My take is I ching is telling me to simplify and focus on the basics. Simplify the process of thought, or simplify the list to essentials, or find greater inner meaning and less social, formal expressions. or retire off the grid and simplify everything to bare bone. My interpretation does not help me much, i want a little more guidance a little "sign". I am invested in every little and major thing of my life, and not happy. I need to focus on the short list. What could be the energy of the white horse for? Or what partnership is there, my friends are on other continents, family scattered too. what can be the matrimonial ally? news of some sort?sixth line - my take is death, as the end of all lines, the end of all struggles and what can be more simple than that.Iam not ready for that line of thought. or a second level of simplification at the end of first round of simplifying.?should i have asked a different question:?and the relating hex speaks of giving up the job and follow other paths for spiritual or material enrichment? or is this wishful thinking? or forget my dreams and stay in the job for ever and for material gain:?. or is it telling me to beauty myself, my inner self to get allies where i am now, so stay employed but clean up your act?any help appreciated. Thanks

Hi Stars22,

The answer truly lies within you, however I can give you my experience with the same reading:

I was waiting for an inheritance after my mother, with whom I'd been living, passed away (55). I couldn't see how things would all work out due to many complications (but they did) (22.4) and in the meantime my life was upended to the point of bare, stark simplicity within and without, dealing with core issues and until I found a permanent place to live (22.6).

Similarly, you have the retirement package (55) with many questions about how things will work out (but they could) (22.4) and concerns about how much you will have to simplify things in order to live (22.6).

The good news for me was that after about a year things did work out and have gotten better ever since. I wouldn't say it would be easy for you if you took the retirement package, especially not with 22.6, but I have a feeling just from reading your post that with your creative ability, you'd be able to adjust, build new relationships, and discover new meaning in your days. Considering the life you describe now, it sounds like it might be of great personal benefit to you for the years to come. It would be totally understandable, however, if you wanted to wait it out.

what should be my priorities when I am making this decision (to take the retirement package or not).
What should be on my short list.
22.4.6. > 55

22.4 is something like out of a fairy tale. Something flamboyant and beautiful. Something too good to be true. I believe this refers to the pay package. It's only half a year's pay, and yet you're wondering if this small amount can really turn your whole life around. You applied for another job and didn't get it - job markets around the world are truly harsh indeed. And you have no pension. Also you have no concrete plan for what exactly you'd like to do. And last but not least, you have the absolutely normal feeling that leaving your husband to go out alone into the unknown would be a bad idea. All in all, this pay package is an empty show which does not lead anywhere good in my opinion.

22.6 is something plain and simple, without any adornments. The bare essentials. In China white is also the colour of mourning.

55 speaks of many opportunities still lying ahead. So perhaps if you do take the pay package, you will still have opportunities to remedy the situation later. You will feel sad, as 55 mentions, but you will somehow survive further.

All in all if this was my answer I just wouldn't go ahead.